The issue is the names I want for my kids. I like short names. I like certain boys’ names for girls. And I think the legal name you have on your ID should match the name you are called every day because it makes more sense. Other people believe that the names I like are too nickname-y, or improper for a legal name. I disagree b/c I am surrounded, professionally, by people who go by Kate, Jules, Sam (all females); they DON’T see themselves as Katherine, Juliet, or Samantha and they never use those names. What is your opinion?
WDYT? Let me give you examples
Girls:
[name_f]Juliana[/name_f] [name_f]Holly[/name_f] nn [name_u]Jules[/name_u]…OR [name_u]Jules[/name_u] [name_f]Holly[/name_f]
[name_f]Jocelyn[/name_f] [name_f]Beth[/name_f] nn [name_u]Joss[/name_u]…OR [name_u]Joss[/name_u] [name_f]Beth[/name_f]
[name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] [name_u]Darcy[/name_u] nn [name_f]Bess[/name_f]…OR [name_f]Bess[/name_f] [name_u]Darcy[/name_u]
Boys:
[name_m]Vincent[/name_m] [name_m]Bastian[/name_m] nn [name_m]Vin[/name_m]…OR [name_m]Vin[/name_m] [name_m]Bastian[/name_m]…OR [name_m]Vin[/name_m] [name_m]Bas[/name_m]
[name_m]Nikolai[/name_m] [name_m]Lennix[/name_m] nn [name_u]Nico[/name_u]…OR [name_u]Nico[/name_u] [name_m]Lennix[/name_m]
[name_m]Jason[/name_m] [name_m]Laszlo[/name_m] nn [name_u]Jace[/name_u]…OR [name_u]Jace[/name_u] [name_m]Laszlo[/name_m]
For me it kind of depends on the name. I like [name_u]Jules[/name_u] better than [name_f]Juliana[/name_f] but you never know what the personality will be, esp over time, so I feel like a longer name [name_f]Juliana[/name_f] gives more options. On the other hand I actually like [name_u]Joss[/name_u] [name_f]Beth[/name_f]. For the boys, [name_m]Vin[/name_m] feels incomplete to me. But I know a [name_u]Nico[/name_u] and a [name_u]Jace[/name_u] so those seem fine.
[name_f]Juliana[/name_f] [name_f]Holly[/name_f] nn [name_u]Jules[/name_u]
[name_u]Joss[/name_u] [name_f]Beth[/name_f]
[name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] [name_u]Darcy[/name_u] nn [name_f]Bess[/name_f]
[name_m]Vincent[/name_m] [name_m]Bastian[/name_m] nn [name_m]Vin[/name_m]
[name_u]Nico[/name_u] [name_m]Lennix[/name_m]
[name_u]Jace[/name_u] [name_m]Laszlo[/name_m]
I think it depends on the personality of the child/future adult. That’s why I like long, serious, CV names, and nicknames are optional. I detest my name because it’s a diminutive (though not usually thought of as such). I’ll probably change it to something long and pretentious eventually.
I agree with you. Personally, I don’t see why it can’t go both ways. Someone may have their full name as [name_f]Juliana[/name_f] on the CV, but only like to be called [name_u]Jules[/name_u], and that’s fine, so I don’t see why you can’t have [name_u]Jules[/name_u] on your CV, and be called [name_f]Juliana[/name_f].
I’m another that would prefer the longer name. I don’t mind nickname-y type names, but I like that there are usually more options to pick from with the longer “version”.
Using your example: [name_f]Juliana[/name_f] [name_f]Holly[/name_f] nn [name_u]Jules[/name_u]…OR [name_u]Jules[/name_u] [name_f]Holly[/name_f]. [name_u]Jules[/name_u] could still end up going by [name_u]Juli[/name_u]. [name_f]Juliana[/name_f] might eventually prefer going by [name_u]Juli[/name_u], [name_f]Lia[/name_f], [name_f]Ana[/name_f], or the full [name_f]Juliana[/name_f] over the nn. Some kids even end up getting nicknames that aren’t directly related to their fn, although I often see this more in friendships between guys.
I certainly think you need a longer name, it looks much more professional [name_f]IMO[/name_f], and it is nice to give your child the choice! I really like the full name [name_f]Juliana[/name_f]. I think you could get away with just “[name_u]Nico[/name_u]” though.
I would nearly always use the name that you are going to call the child on the birth certificate. Why put [name_f]Katherine[/name_f] when [name_f]Kate[/name_f] is the name you love and is what you will be calling her? I just don’t get this ‘rule’ that states that you have to have a ‘full’ name. Obviously things like [name_m]Chuck[/name_m] or [name_f]Bebe[/name_f] would not be suitable but most short names will be fine. People need to get over the CV scare and just name their babies what they love.
For me it’s not about the resume but about intentionally limiting your child and forcing them to live with a cutesy/childish name. There are some that are established and can be mature enough for an adult (e.g. [name_m]Liam[/name_m], [name_f]Mae[/name_f], [name_m]Jack[/name_m]). These are a far cry from [name_f]Ellie[/name_f], [name_u]Billy[/name_u], [name_f]Katie[/name_f], etc.
[name_m]Just[/name_m] as there are examples of people who prefer their nickname name there are the opposite. You don’t know which category your child will fall into so why not err on the side of caution? I have an uncle [name_u]Willie[/name_u], just [name_u]Willie[/name_u]. He hates that that is his name and in professional settings goes by [name_m]William[/name_m]. He is not the only adult I know with this issue. I’ve known [name_u]Christie[/name_u], [name_u]Freddie[/name_u], [name_m]Johnny[/name_m], [name_f]Lulu[/name_f], [name_f]Jennie[/name_f], [name_u]Mickey[/name_u], and more who hate their childish names
I’ve thought about this a lot, because a lot of the names that I like are nickname-y, but I will probably end up giving more full names to my children and calling them by nicknames. As an [name_u]Alexis[/name_u] who almost exclusively goes by [name_u]Lexi[/name_u], I really like having a longer name to use when I want to be a little more professional. For a while I even used it in school, only my family has always called me [name_u]Lexi[/name_u]. I can understand wanting to name your child what you’re actually going to call them, but to me it makes more sense to give them a longer name. However, none of your nicknames are too nickname-y for me, if that makes any sense… [name_u]Jules[/name_u] and [name_u]Joss[/name_u] are maybe pushing it a little for me as full names, but all of your options are better than naming your kid [name_f]Maisey[/name_f] or [name_f]Posy[/name_f] or something that is going to always sound like a little girl’s name.
Sidenote, I think boys can get away with nickname-y names more easily, because very few boy nicknames sound exclusively like something you’d be shouting at a toddler…
Anyways, I like to call myself [name_u]Mattie[/name_u] from time to time, but couldn’t stand having this name and ONLY this name all my life. [name_f]Marta[/name_f] may not be long, but is an established name and still has lots of possible nickname options which vary depending on the language. I also appreciate how international my name is, because everybody knows my name and no matter if it’s said with Spanish accent, or as English [name_f]Martha[/name_f], it’s still the same name and people recognize it so it makes it easier for me to make a connection with them (yes, just because they’re familiar with my name!).
And another point: try to introduce yourself as [name_f]Katie[/name_f] to… for example your gynecologist. Or to new class mates. Or anybody, really… and your voice sounds just a lil bit girly…
Next example: I am 22 but I look younger. People often ask me about my ID because they think I’m under 18 or something… Plus, I am small (only 163cm, so 5ft 4"). [name_f]Imagine[/name_f] how hard it was for me - all my life, when people didn’t take me seriously. If I had a nickname name I’d probably change it by now.
On top of all this, I am very serious person, a little bit introvert, with uncommon sense of humor (if with any sense of humor at all…) - and people, especially those who don’t know me very well, always ask me ‘what is it?’ or ‘why are you so sad?’ etc. They don’t get that that’s what I am. And now imagine my name is [name_u]Josie[/name_u] or something… I don’t think that cutesy nicknamey name would suit such grumpy personality. I don’t say I’m all the time like that, but it happens quite often.
Or another example. [name_f]Imagine[/name_f] a person who is big. Not fat or anything, just big. Tall, big hands and feet. Name her [name_f]Bessie[/name_f] or [name_f]Minnie[/name_f]. Not cool, huh?
[name_f]My[/name_f] point is, that although I like most of your nickname-as-first-name options, such as [name_u]Jules[/name_u] or [name_u]Jace[/name_u] (maybe because they doesn’t sound too cutesy and too nicknamey), it is usually a bad idea to name your kid a nickname name - and that’s for various reasons.
I prefer a formal name to a shortened form for the given name. That way your child has multiple options, whether to find what suits them best as an individual or to vary over time or in different settings/with different people. I like nicknames to signify familiarity and affection, using a full name when meeting new people, in the workplace, etc.
I have a (very) distant relative who’s name is [name_f]Minnie[/name_f] and she’s almost 7’ tall and my mom and I laugh every time we see a picture of her.
You may feel this way about names, but there’s no telling what your child will think about his or her name. I think it is the better thing to do to give the kid options; they may turn out to love the long form and the propriety it connotes, or they may like the short form like your coworkers do.
With that said, not all nicknames are alike. Some names can be used both as a nickname and as a full name (e.g., [name_f]Kate[/name_f], [name_f]Beth[/name_f], [name_f]Bess[/name_f], [name_u]Nico[/name_u], [name_u]Jace[/name_u], [name_u]Jules[/name_u]). Other nicknames don’t transition as well because the long form is so tied to the nickname as to be inescapable. If you named a little boy [name_m]Dave[/name_m] instead of [name_m]David[/name_m] it would create no end of hassles for him. So I think there is a way to make your personal style work for you here, but it will all come down to the actual names you select.
There’s absolutely no guarantees whatever name you pick for your child, that they are going to love it! (in fact, much greater chance that they won’t). You might choose a more formal name, and they’ll wish for a nicknamey type or choose a nickname and they’ll want a more formal name. Choosing a name that gives them “options” can in some ways make up for this. But then you risk them not liking the fact that they aren’t using their “actual” name. You can’t win! I reckon go with whatever you want and realise that no matter what you choose there’s a very high chance your child will wish you didn’t! They’ll get their turn when they have their own children.
This scenario always reminds me of clothing. I’m rather short, but not really petite or small-framed, and whenever I buy jeans or longer dresses, I find I need to have them shortened by at least an inch or two, if not more, in order for them to flatter me properly. This isn’t a big or difficult change, so I don’t mind it, especially because I know it’s a lot easier to take length away than to add it on. [name_f]My[/name_f] poor cousin (who actually has a nickname name!) is 6 feet tall and agonizes over all of the dresses that are cut too short for her, while I have the option of making them fit me.
I feel the same way about names. [name_f]My[/name_f] four-syllable, formal name looks great on resumes and name tags, but I can go by my nickname at home and with friends, and I have an even shorter nickname that my close friends use.