@[name_f]Hayley[/name_f], personally I’m most worried about the stress TTC causes. I’m not so worried about the actually getting pregnant part. Going by my charting, rebounding from BC, and my family history, I’m not too worried on my part of conception as of right now, but there are two people in the equation. If we end up unable to conceive, I think I would be okay with that (eventually) once I knew that it wasn’t possible. It’s the waiting every month and getting the negative, not knowing why, having that intensely low feeling after being so hopeful. Ugh, that thought saddens me more than a doctor saying, “Sorry, but no, it won’t happen.”
I think it worries almost everyone, though… there’s always that nagging feeling of, “What if I can’t get pregnant?” Becoming a parent is such a monumental thing for most women. At least the book you read has many other chapters about getting a positive result [name_u]Silver[/name_u] lining, I guess.
Nice to meet you!
@Nannster, Best of luck come [name_f]July[/name_f]!
@ffennec, there are so many parents out there who are only children. It’s in our nature to raise children, so don’t worry too much. While not everyone has strong parental instincts, I think we catch on quickly, since it really is a necessity. The only way you’ll gain confidence with kids is to get the exposure. I have 2 younger brothers, but both are close enough in age that I don’t remember them as infants. I had never really been around babies until my cousins had kids. I’m 12/13 years younger than they are and they both had 2 girls within a 3.5 year span at the same time, so all of a sudden there were many babies in my family. With the first one, I was quite tentative, by the 3rd, I spent a lot of free time visiting just to care for the baby while my cousin could get other things done. I feel like many people have grandfathers who go through that, too. Hands-off with their own kids, but by the 2nd grandbaby, they are much more comfortable with infants.
If you’re looking for experience, I’d recommend volunteering at a childcare facility. It’s a lot less committal than deciding to work there, plus, in childcare, extra hands are usually a good thing. [name_m]Even[/name_m] volunteering in a kindergarten class is an eye-opener. The church is probably a great place to volunteer! You won’t be the only adult there, so if you’re ever feeling uncomfortable or overwhelmed, there’s someone to help you through.
@[name_f]Dany[/name_f], your perspective will be very interesting here! When I was in my late teens, I absolutely wanted nothing to do with a relationship, and everything to do with parenting. I wanted babies young, and I remember looking in to sperm banks when I was like, 18. I was single for almost all of my 20s, and thought about AI before I met my SO, as a “By the time I’m 30…” kind of thing. I will say, at 28, I have no regrets not having kids yet. I ended up leading a very different, much more rewarding life than I never imagined back in high school when I was obsessed with the thought of having kids. I do feel like I lucked out though, because had things gone differently and I had neither those experiences [name_f]NOR[/name_f] kids, I might not be so happy about it.
I know a few moms who are single parents by choice. It works definitely works for some, and I wish you luck!
@shalexis, it definitely makes me feel better too, knowing I’m not the only one thinking about it
@hayley, I started charting in [name_u]January[/name_u] and it has been an eye opener. It’s way more time and commitment than just popping a pill, but it’s interesting and I’m seeing a lot of benefits to being this in-tune with my body. Not everyone has a hard time conceiving after coming off BC, so if you’re more comfortable waiting and getting the potential overdrive, go for it! Especially if you don’t want to conceive before then. Charting is kind of fun though, and it’s nice to know the signs to expect for fertility.
whew!
Also, hi to [name_u]Devin[/name_u]! Because I felt bad leaving you out