Question for Parents from a Nanny

Hey parentberries! So I am currently working as a nanny for a family of 3 - a 1yr old and 2 older children. The older kids are in school for most of the day so it’s just me and the 1 yr old for most of the time. They usually pay me 21 an hour when its just me and the baby and 26 when it’s all 3. I have 7+ years of experience and am certified in pediatric first aid/cpr/aed and that is just about the average salary for a nanny in the area I live in so I thought it was a fair price. They mentioned last year that they were struggling a bit to pay that though and were wondering if I would be interested in doing a nanny share so they could cut down the cost they pay but I would also be paid more. They found another family that was looking for a nanny for a 4 month old and I said I would be interested. I suggested to the mother that they could both pay me 15 an hour so that would be 6$ cheaper than what they were already paying me. Looking back I can see where my confusion comes from because the mother was like oh no we would pay you more than that - so I think she might have thought I meant in total(?!). So I was like ok awesome and these past few months I have been planning on making at least 30 with the 2 babies. Come to find out today that they are both paying me for 12 an hour each or 24 total. It was the husband that emailed me the pay schedule saying it was what they agreed on but I have no recollection of ever agreeing to that pay. I am basically doubling my work load for a 3 dollar pay increase which to me isn’t worth it. I honestly think I would have preferred lowering the cost of taking care of just the 1 baby if I knew this ahead of time.

I don’t know what to do - I know I definitely should have been more upfront about all of this earlier but I thought we were on the same page. Now I start with the new baby soon and I feel like it’s too late to say anything. [name_f]Do[/name_f] you guys think 24 an hour is fair and I should just suck it up for the next few months or should I bring it up with the parents? The first families kid is an absolute sweetheart but this new baby is a bit of a handful and I was already stressed about the work it is going to be to take care of him - I don’t want there to be any resentment between all of us but I don’t know what to do.

1 Like

First off I just wanna say that I was a nanny for about 9 years until very recently, so I’m speaking from experience. What they’re doing is absolutely not fair at all, and you need to bring it up now before it goes any farther. You never agreed to that rate, and even mentioned a rate you thought was fair, and they can’t just come up with a rate without you. [name_f]Do[/name_f] you have any communication with the new family, or only the original family you’ve been working for? I would say that you need to sit down and speak with at least one parent from each family and set up a rate that makes sense for your situation.


Thanks for getting back to me! Ya thinking over it I don’t know how none of them thought to include me in any of these talks they were apparently having. I’ve talked a bit with the new family but besides a talk where I mentioned that I would charge my full price for days that I just had their baby as opposed to the nanny share fee I haven’t discussed it with them. I’m just a bit hesitant because besides this issue the situation is very convenient for me and I don’t want to mess it up by upsetting them. I know I logically should though because you’re right that it really isn’t fair to me.

They did think to not include you. They very specifically chose not to include you so they could come up with a price that suited them and hope they could bully you into taking it. $3 extra an hour for a whole extra baby is insanely low, and they know it. Sit down and talk to them and explain that you never agreed to that price.


I honestly think the pay price is fair what I don’t find fair is not including you in on that.

1 Like

Hmm tricky one- I’ve been in similar situations. On the one hand you like the set up and don’t want to ruin it. On the other, you thought you were going to receive $30 an hour. It is hard to know whether this has been done deliberately or through a misunderstanding but I would recommend you maybe put it down in writing - including that you discussed it with the original family and there was perhaps an misunderstanding over the $15 an hour. Then when you next see the family, try to explain the situation but say you also wrote it down just to clarify in case you sound confusing and hand over the written copy. You can also forward this, or ask it to be forward if you don’t have their details, to the new family. I think you have to stand up for yourself here on the off chance it was done strategically because you will seem like an easy push over if that is the case and the next thing you know they’ll be coming home late and you won’t be getting paid overtime etc etc. I speak from experience.


I’m not a parent but I am a babysitter (sorta). [name_f]My[/name_f] advice would be to talk to the parents. 3 dollars an hour, even for an infant, is insane. Also, do you ever buy the older kids snack from your own money, or do the parents supply snack/money for snack? Because I think that if you were paying for snacks out of pocket you could almost definitely get at least a slight pay raise because that is not your job. Overall, as much as I’m sure you want to avoid conflict, I would talk to the parents and say “I would like to be being paid blank amount of money, because that is what seems fair to me”. Sorry for such a chaotic reply, but I hope it helps!