Questions -- if you've used TWO middle names

General Name Discussion
1

  1. [name]Do[/name] you use them both when you “middle name” your child, or just the first middle? (ie, “[name]Lara[/name] [name]Jane[/name]! Put down that fork and step away from the cake!” [this isn’t my conscience talking or anything, just a totally random example…])

  2. [name]Do[/name] you use them both on official forms & documents? I’m thinking most of these only have room for one middle name/initial.

  3. [name]How[/name] did you decide which middle name comes first when choosing your combos?

Here’s my dilemma… [name]Henry[/name] kind of has two middle names, one given at birth, and the second given informally (and unofficially) around age 6. Husband chose a middle name before we ever met, to honor a dear friend. As time went by and [name]Henry[/name] got older, Husband regretted not choosing a family name, so we gave him a “new” middle name to honor several dear family members, and we no longer use his official middle name… except officially. (Still with me?)

What bothers me is that [name]Henry[/name]'s “new” middle name is super traditional and common, which makes his new first-middle combo the name of a famous author. His official middle name is a little more modern & fun sounding, kind of a diminutive of a surname-turned-firstname. Think “[name]Tuck[/name]” from [name]Tucker[/name]. So we’re comparing “[name]Henry[/name] [name]John[/name]” to “[name]Henry[/name] [name]Tuck[/name],” for example. (Sorry I’m being cryptic about these, I just don’t want to put the whole thing on the internet!) I think it gives his name a little spunk, makes it less “tired.” Not to mention, it’s the name we gave him when we found out we were pregnant, he came home with it, it’s on his SS card, etc. I hate to just throw it away completely, even though he’s never called by it anymore.

So now that you have all of that info…!

If we ever legally change [name]Henry[/name]'s name (add the other middle), which middle should come first? We call him the traditional one, so I’m leaning towards that. But his official middle is already on all legal documents, so maybe it’d be easier if we kept it in first place?

Another thing: [name]Do[/name] we give [name]Baby[/name] Girl two middle names? I’d hate to “short” her by giving her only one, in case we ever get [name]Henry[/name]'s changed. I’m also struggling about the order if we came up with two middle names (we’re still working on her first name! LOL!). The names we like tend to be – like [name]Henry[/name] – “old fashioned” and even heavy sounding. I like the idea of giving her a lighter middle name to balance it out, but [name]Henry[/name] goes by the double-traditional without the second more modern name, so I’m worried about them not sounding like they belong together (I’m big on sibsets!) if she’s called something like [name]Frances[/name] [name]Plum[/name] vs [name]Frances[/name] [name]Helen[/name]. What do you think?

Oh, my goodness… if you’ve stayed with me this long, I thank you. I’m just overthinking this whole thing too much, I fear. It’s beyond ridiculous at this point. She doesn’t even have a first name so I shouldn’t be this obsessive about middles!

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80+ views and no respone? [name]Man[/name]! I knew my questions were convoluted! :rolleyes:

Maybe we should go with “[name]Bueller[/name], [name]Bueller[/name]” for the middles! LOL

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I figure you deserve a response, but I don’t have any kids, much less with two middles. However… I really like the idea oof two middles and maybe when I’m older, I will use two. I like the idea of [name]Henry[/name] [name]Tuck[/name] better than [name]Henry[/name] [name]John[/name]. [name]Henry[/name] is toned down wit [name]John[/name], but with [name]Tuck[/name], it sounds much hmm… happier! I’d also say it’d be easier, because of all the legal documents, to keep the traditional name first in the combo. Also, if [name]Henry[/name] has two middles I think your next little girl should too. Unless she has two very long names. Good luck, and this probably won’t help much, but those are just my opinions. :slight_smile:

5

I don’t have personal experience with giving children 2 middle names but the one piece of advice I can give is that if you choose to use two middle names to make sure that the three names flow well together and with your last name. In the example with [name]Henry[/name]/[name]Tucker[/name]/[name]John[/name], I would think [name]Henry[/name] [name]John[/name] [name]Tucker[/name] (1-2 syllable last name) would be good whereas [name]Henry[/name] [name]Tucker[/name] [name]John[/name] (3+ syllable last name) might sound better. I would also try to keep the number of names consistent with all your children but I have seen some families where all the boys have 2 middle names and the girls have 1 or vice versa.

Good luck!I hope that helps a little

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I also don’t have any children yet, but I do plan on using two mns! As for the order… I don’t know that I have an actual method to my madness–I usually just go for what I think sounds/looks better… my family names are usually shorter one-syllable names (think [name]Grace[/name], [name]Pearl[/name], [name]Jane[/name], [name]Claire[/name], [name]Kate[/name], [name]Gray[/name], [name]Beck[/name], [name]Mae[/name], etc.), so they usually work better at the end. I like the idea of keeping two fun names together at the beginning and using a name to honor family at the end.

If both of [name]Henry[/name]'s middle names are short, though, I would consider putting the more formal one last and the more spunky one first… it breaks up the classic feel of [name]Henry[/name]–and if both names are one syllable I would see if I could do something to lengthen one name to make the flow better… Like [name]Henry[/name] [name]Tucker[/name] [name]John[/name] or [name]Henry[/name] [name]Tuck[/name] [name]Jonathan[/name], instead of [name]Henry[/name] [name]Tuck[/name] [name]John[/name], kwim?

And yes, if you do change [name]Henry[/name]'s name I would definitely give your little girl two MNs, too! Finding two MNs for all my combos is just normal to me, now, lol, but I think it can be really fun. If you can’t make it work, though, I really wouldn’t worry about it. Lots of families have kids with different numbers of mns. I know one family that has two kids with 1 mn, one kid with 2 mns, and one kid with none! I don’t think it’s that big of a deal.

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hahaha this made me laugh so much! Bless your little heart for managing to put that into a cohesive paragraph!

right, well, I think if you should keep the first name and original mn as it is, then add in the new mn after then the surname. [name]Henry[/name] [name]John[/name] [name]Tuck[/name] Surname.
Although totally agree with [name]Ash[/name] above, with the whole lengthening one name to make it flow.
And, I think, depending on how many children you have depends on how many middle names. If your daughter (congratulations!!!) is the last child you have, give her two mns. If you think you are going to have three, do the same, 2 mns. Keeps it fair. However if you think you may have four, 2 could have 1 mn, and 2 could have 2 mns, in whatever order you want. However, you do not know what the future brings, so personally i would give them all 2 mns to keep it fair. xo

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I have two middle names, and haven’t ever had any issues on forms etc. When I was “middle-named” my parents used both names. Always. If someone called me just by my first two names I’d feel it was incomplete. I still get called by both middle names whenever they’re used. If I were you, I’d add the newer middle name in after the first name. Less confusion for him, So [name]Henry[/name] [name]John[/name] [name]Tuck[/name]. I like having two middle names, (especially now that my first name, [name]Sophia[/name] is SO popular) so I’d give your new baby two as well. That’s really just a personal preference, I don’t think it matters too much! My Aunt and Uncle have three kids, the first has no middle name, the second has two, and the third one. They’re in their 20s now and as far as I know there has never been any name jealousy between them!

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My husband has two middle names, and wanted his son to also have two. So he does! Sometimes I do refer to him by all three names, but not often. So far I have been able to use them on official forms and documents, sometimes however, I just use his middle initials, due to space.

My sons first two names actually honour family and the third name was simply because we liked it. I’m due with another baby in 4 weeks and if it is a boy the first two names will again honour family and the third name will be a simply because name! But this isn’t on purpose, the order of names was chosen according to what flowed best to my ear. (If I’m having a girl, all three names will be family names!) So my advice would be, if you legally change [name]Henry[/name]'s name, go with what sounds right to you.

And personally if [name]Henry[/name] has two middle names, then I think it’d be lovely for your daughter to have two middle names as well. Best of luck!

10

My son has two mn. It’s on all his forms as initials in the middle ( maybe that’s the space thing?) his third name is my last name so we have a connection. The only time I’ve had an issue was at his doctors with a fill in receptionist. She actually said," poor kid." after I tried to tell her the name 5 times as it was screwed up on his hospital papers. She seemed cranky and flakey anyway was it’s not that complicated of a name!