Recycling Names....

Hello Berries!
I recently joined this site and am loving it! Like every little girl, I would doodle potential names for my future children. Oh how my tastes have changed through the years. Thankfully, I never actually had to name a child at the age of 8,12, or 16. LOL
Now I’m married, and the DH and I occasionally discuss what we names we might bestow on our future offspring. We are waiting a while longer before we start TTC, but in the meantime, I have a few questions. Maybe one of you berries has some insight?

My husband LOVES the name [name]Christopher[/name] [name]Thomas[/name] (mn is DH given name). I like the name too. In fact, I would love the name if it had not already been used in the family. I have two brothers, one being named [name]Christopher[/name] [name]Ryan[/name]. DH has a brother as well. DH also has a cousin named [name]Christopher[/name]. AND, my sister-in-law’s brother is named [name]Christian[/name]. I just don’t think I could use it for a first or middle name given its popularity among people related directly and distantly. Yet, my husband has loved this name from his youth (who am I to know that guys think about these things when their young), and I feel like the Grinch who stole [name]Christmas[/name] when I tell him no. Any suggestions?

On that note,
[name]Both[/name] of us have fairly large extended families. On my side, there are lots of girls. Which means, several of the girl names we like, are taken. We are not a close family and rarely speak with anyone beyond our immediate siblings/parents. If we were to choose a name already in use, is that appropriate? Because we aren’t close to our relatives, I couldn’t say that I was naming my child after any particular person. In fact, I wouldn’t want to.

The DH also has quite the opinion when it comes to names. [name]Every[/name] time I mention a name, the response is No. I have gotten to the point where I ask him to give me a reason. Sometimes he does, and some of those I respect. However, it seems like 70% of what I like, he basically think sounds like a stripper name. That leaves me with “neutral” names I don’t love. Names that are solid, but nothing that says “thats my child”.
Names that we do like, are taken by one of my 15 female cousins.

Okay… sorry this was so long and rambling. If any of you have any perspective or insight, I would love to hear your thoughts.


I agree that [name]Christopher[/name] is too used in the immediate family. But it could definitely be a middle - would that help at all in feeling less like the Grinch?
For family names, I would probably avoid using a name if it were already in use by a family member that I wouldn’t want the connection to. If it’s a more distant relative that you don’t interact with it is probably ok, but I would also think about whether your siblings or parents [name]DO[/name] interact with that branch of the family because the connection between your child and the inadvertant namesake will seem stronger.
My DH is also very picky without seeming to have much reason behind his vetoes. My strategy and advice to you is to wait. Make lists of names you love, hang out on nameberry, whatever. But don’t push DH. Mention names, but don’t argue. Try to find names he does like but don’t try to talk him into your favorites. For one, you’re not pregnant yet. My experience is that my DH needed to be talking about an actual baby for the conversation to be real. Second, you already know your tastes change (and they’ll do so even more when it’s actually YOUR baby). Why push for a name that you might not even want to use yourself when the time comes?

Good luck!