We’ve been having such a hard time deciding on a name for our little boy- due early [name]April[/name]. Through all of our discussions, there are 2-3 names that we feel okay about (but that don’t have us both excited), and only one name that we both [name]LOVE[/name]. The thing is, it doesn’t particularly “go” with our dd’s name (though they don’t sound “bad” together), it doesn’t flow as well with our last name as well as the others (though, again, not particularly “bad”), it has a different ethnic feel from our last name (British-y versus [name]German[/name]), and we would probably want to give it as his middle name, but then call him by it. In spite of all that, we both just like it- it makes us happy to think of calling our little boy by it.
What do you think? [name]Do[/name] we keep trying to get ourselves to like something else that “fits” our last name & dd’s name better, or just count ourselves insanely lucky that we both have the same favorite and go with it?
Also, how do folks feel about calling someone by their middle name? We have a fn/mn combo that flows well with our last name, sounds good with dd, and should suit him for the long haul (in case he chooses to go by his first name instead as he gets older). [name]How[/name] confusing is it for folks- with starting school, filling out forms, etc.- if his first name isn’t the name that he gets called?
Without knowing the name itself, it’s a bit hard to judge, but if the name ages well, you love it, and it doesn’t sound awful with your last name, I say go with it! I mean, I’m considering the name [name]Eliska[/name] for a future daughter, which is very Czech, and my surname is predominantly English/Welsh in origin. Besides, I think sometimes a very English/British name can fit well with a longer, more complicated surname. A lot of people seem to put a lot of emphasis on whether a name goes with the siblings’ names, and whether it goes with the surname, etc., and while that is nice and important, I think it’s more important to find a name you love and a name that will serve your son well throughout his life. As long as the names aren’t as different as [name]Nevaeh[/name] and [name]Arthur[/name] or something, I think you’re fine.
I agree with [name]Ash[/name] that it’s really hard to say without knowing the name, however, if you love a name and have thought it through thoroughly and it’s not offensive/rude go for it!
Personally, I think if you both love the name, use it. It doesn’t matter if it goes perfectly with your last name or your dd name, what matters is that it goes well and isn’t awful with the others.
As far as your other question, I think it’s a little confusing for other people if he goes by his middle name, but on forms, he’ll just fill it all out correctly. It’s really not that confusing though. There are 2 boys at my daycare, 2 brothers, that go exclusively by their middle names. They’re names are [name]Benjamin[/name] [name]Seth[/name] and [name]Brendan[/name] [name]Luke[/name]. In 2 years, I never knew they went by their middle names until they told me so…I think whatever you choose it’ll be okay.
People blow the importance of sibsets out of proportion. Yes, it’s lovely to have a well-matched bunch that seem destined to be siblings; but it’s more important that you have a name you love than a name that goes perfectly with your daughter’s name. I might chuckle at a very ill-matched sibset like [name]Theodore[/name] and Madisynne, but if you’re happy that’s what matters.
The flow may be an issue, but not knowing the names, I can’t say. I’d advise you against rhyming ([name]Mike[/name] [name]Pike[/name]) or anything that could sound ridiculous/embarassing ([name]Mike[/name] [name]Hawk[/name]) but something that just slurs ([name]Mike[/name] Kaplan) isn’t that bad.
I don’t like the idea of calling someone by their middle name except in very special circumstances. For example, if you want to call your son [name]Zebedee[/name] but think it’s a bit over the top for a professional environment, I’m all for [name]John[/name] [name]Zebedee[/name], called [name]Zeb[/name]. But if you have no other reason than it sounds better with a sibling’s name and the last name, I’m not sure it’s worth the trouble. But again, this is my opinion without knowing the name.
