The Third Baby

Thoughts on those from going from 2 to 3, or 3 to 4?!

I really would just love to hear from mums of threes (or more!) or people in a similar situation!!

I think at the end of the day the decision is between you and your husband. My husband and I personally decided two was our number, we have girls too. But I see nothing selfish in wanting a third child. The majority of my friends have three kids. And they seem to make it work well, so I am sure that you would
be able to too.

I do think its always smart to ask yourselves if this will cause financial issues or spread yourselves too thin emotionally, but I think that if you know that you can afford it and are wanting another baby than go for it. It’s not a decision for the rest of your family.

We have the opposite problem, we have lots of people that ask if we will try for a boy.

We have two as well (ages 3 and 1) and I have been wondering the same thing. Financially, I think we would be able to afford another but my husband worries he will be too stressed out if we have another child. I personally would love to have one or two more but wonder, since my husband isn’t super excited about the idea, if I am being selfish. My mom tells me we should stop at two, as well. (I think because she watches them while I work and doesn’t want to watch any more, haha!) Several people have told me that having three is harder because you are “outnumbered” by the kids. I think it all depends on how you handle it and how you and your husband work together in tough situations.

Only you know your financial situation, so it’s hard to answer that question. As for your other children, I think siblings are a gift. It may not always seem like that; I even have an iffy relationship with my own brother. But I love him and would never wish that I didn’t have him. I totally understand your worries about health, etc, too. Having a baby, regardless of how many you’ve had, is always scary. I think the more you have, the more you understand the risks you take with your own health and the chances of the baby’s health. Unfortunately, that’s just one of those things that you can never predict.

All in all, like the previous poster said, it is completely up to you and what you think is best for your family. I think as long as you have the means to provide a caring, stable home for your children, there is no problem with bringing another child into the world.

Thanks for your insights everyone. I have to admit I’ve been trawling the internet for the answer to a question that can probably only be found by looking at our family!

@nameplanner - yeah I wouldn’t listen to the doom and gloom stories. I’d say that 90% of my friends and family have 3 kids and they are love it just fine.

Good luck!

I think a number just feels right sometimes and if three is for you then it’s for you! My older two are twins and we knew we wanted more, after our third it just felt uneven and that 4 was the right number. Is it crazy at times? yes! But I rarely hear people regretting that third or fourth!

We have three and my husband was nervous about adding a third but she’s now almost two and I can’t imagine not sure havimg her. Her siblings adore her and while things get crazy sometimes it’s well worth it.

I now feel like you about adding a fourth. I think I want one more but am nervous at the idea too.

We have three, expecting #4.
I was nervous for 3. Something about the number not being even made me nervous. I didn’t know how I would split my time, I worried my kids wouldn’t get enough attention but you just make it work. I can’t say I spend any less time with my daughters than I did before.
It just feels natural now though, my youngest was 1 in [name_f]September[/name_f], and it just feels like he was always here. It’s crazy, because he’s crazy. The craziest and most irritatingly cheeky (yet adorable) one of my kids, and he drives me crazy sometimes but he’s family, he fits in perfectly with his sisters, who love him to bits too.

It’s definitely hard sometimes, definitely crazy most of the time, but it’s worth it!

I think this is something you and your husband have to decide for yourselves. I am one of 13 children and it has been crazy most of the time. I’ve never felt like I didn’t get attention, but that might be because I’m the second oldest as well. There is however a huge difference between 3 and 13 children, and I’m sure you would be alright if you decided to go for a third baby. The only advice I have is to try to avoid a huge age gap. I’m closest to my older brother who is three years older than me, and it feels like I don’t even know my four youngest siblings because of he age gap and the fact that we only shared a house for a short period of time.

I think you will just have to do what feels like to you guys. I wouldn’t worry too much about money. Things usually works out in the end and I much rather have a tight financial budget but have all the children I ever wanted. :slight_smile: