The Woes and Joys of being obsessed with Names

General Name Discussion
1

[name_u]Baby[/name_u] names- such a fun but hard obsession! Nobody gets it. [name_f]My[/name_f] rude family tunes me out whenever I mention names. As a teen girl, I can’t e be caught looking at a baby name book. I always get the urge to randomly write down names. I always feel like someone is looking iver my shoulder. I wish people would just accept that I love names. I wish they would listen and under stand. I’m obsessed the way one person might be with their favorite TV series. [name_m]Even[/name_m] when I’m an adult, having kids would not be an option(long story, i just can’t) I must resort to using my favorite names for fictions.

I must repress the urge to groan when people name their kid something trendy or just… ugh.

I’m not inti history, origins, meaning, etc. [name_m]Just[/name_m] the sounds and spellings. I have a hard time telling my parents amd friends. They’ll never get it.

Does anyone else feels this way?

2

Sometimes I do. Luckily my friends are actually really great about it. I showed them my book of names (with all my faves etc.), and they were really interested in it. But I’d like to talk about names all the time, and I know they won’t (I can talk about anything I like for hours).

[name_f]My[/name_f] family doesn’t know about it (although I think my mum’s seen me on Nameberry), and I don’t really want them to know, especially not my dad’s side of the family (they clearly have a very set name style). Maybe my mum, but even then, I’m pretty sure she’s not into names. Sometimes I think if I at least had a sister, or someone in my family around my age I was close to, but I don’t.

It also really annoys me that I don’t have the guts to go buy a baby name book. If there was another teen or adult or someone who would go with me, I would, but it’s just weird as a teen, especially as I’m really shy and awkward.

But I should be meeting some new people (my age) over the next few weeks, so maybe by some miracle there’ll be someone as into names as me, who’s confident enough to admit it first (as if). I just feel a bit likes it’s extra difficult as a teen, and I don’t write or anything, so there’s not her reason to collect names now except for future babies. I’m going to have kids at some point, but I think being 16 and not ever having had a boyfriend (let alone now) looks like I’m planning way too far ahead. It’s fine on Nameberry of course, but I’m slightly paranoid it must look a bit odd to non name nerds.

Sorry, I’ve rambled so much, and gone completely off topic.

3

@myosotis: Buy them online. That’s what I did. [name_f]My[/name_f] mom didn’t really care that I was buying a name book. She just wanted me to pay her back. :stuck_out_tongue:

4

Yeah, it’s kind of awkward, because you worry people will think you’re baby crazy. Because what’s the point of looking up names if you have nobody to name, right? I just have always (mostly) kept it to myself, I will comment on names now and again in conversation but it’s not like people know about my word docs - it’s a semi-private hobby for me.

[name_f]My[/name_f] sisters-in-law did get me an Icelandic name etymology book (it is not a baby-name book) for [name_u]Christmas[/name_u], though, and as far as they know we have no immediate plans to reproduce (we do, but they don’t know about it) so some people know I am ‘interested in names’. I’m interested in all etymology, though, and languages in general. There’s definitely some overlap. I have never wanted to look at a baby-name book, all the info is on the internet, right? So I guess if I were you, I just wouldn’t tell my family or friends, like why do they need to know?

Either way, probably try not to take it so seriously. ‘Obsession’ is a pretty strong word.

5

@southern.maple, I would, but my mum is one of the few people who doesn’t have a credit or debit card (or any means of paying for anything online). And it would be way too awkward with my dad. :stuck_out_tongue:

6

I know what you mean: I remember people used to think I was incredibly strange when I whipped out my name book to make lists during school hours. They thought I was extremely clucky and baby crazy, when I just love names. It helped me kick butt in English, [name_m]History[/name_m] and [name_m]Art[/name_m] though, because I knew about the meaning and background of names, as well as their most famous bearers, so I had a good idea of their origin and background (religious, etc.).

7

I know what you mean: I remember people used to think I was incredibly strange when I whipped out my name book to make lists during school hours. They thought I was extremely clucky and baby crazy, when I just love names. It helped me kick butt in English, [name_m]History[/name_m] and [name_m]Art[/name_m] though, because I knew about the meaning and background of names, as well as their most famous bearers, so I had a good idea of their origin and background (religious, etc.), as well as the root word. I am lucky that my parents and my little sister are quite interested in names, and their origins, so I have someone to talk about names with, although, even they can only take so much :).

8

Obsession may be a strong word, but I feel like I really am. I seriosuly go on Nameberry first thing kn the morning and make name lists last things before bed. I have owned an outdated magazine for about four years becauseit lists baby names. I play games just to name the characters sometimes. I spend more time on this site than kn any other.

I due fend to get very hooked on one subject for long periods of time.

9

I understand. I only “came out” as a name nerd shortly before I got pregnant because before I was worried what people would think if I went all out with name research and lists. It only seemed acceptable when it was used as a party trick of sorts, telling people what their names meant.
It all changed when I went to Military Police school, of all places. Training was winding down and we mostly spent the day cleaning our weapons or the building, and a female was sent a game in the mail where she would write her favorite names for a girl and a boy for every letter of the alphabet. I stayed up an hour past lights out helping her finish her list and suddenly I was inspired. I started my own list and spent the next day asking for help from other people while hiding it from the Drill Sergeants (if they found it, god, I can’t imagine how bad that would have gone!). Surprisingly it was mostly males who wanted to help suggest names to me, but everyone was either supportive or neutral about it except for one older male who already had kids and looked at my list and said if I named a future child any of these names s/he would be teased for life. It was probably omly because we were so bored at that point, but it made me feel confident enough to start making, revising, and researching names once I got home. I got pregnant shortly afterwards, so a lot of my family probably thinks it is just because of the baby, but now that I have released my naming beast, he will never go back into that cage!

10

To be honest, my mum always knew I liked names, because when I was about 8 or 9, I was sat on a naming site trying to find one for a baby doll, and at the time, my family had one computer, in the living room, so everyone could see it. After that, it’d be every few weeks, and I’d be spending time on ParentsConnect (I don’t think Nameberry was around then!), researching names and meanings.

The big time nerdiness didn’t come about until I was 16 though. In Parenting class (which I took in high school, as I wanted to become a teacher and work with young children), we had to do an essay assignment on 6 names (3 boys, 3 girls) we would use for a baby. [name_f]My[/name_f] classmates sort of laughed it off, picked some random names, and wrote them down, but I spent hours with my best friend, making up lists, narrowing them down, rewriting, etc, until I found my three. I believe they were [name_m]Mark[/name_m] [name_m]William[/name_m], [name_m]Thomas[/name_m] [name_m]Anthony[/name_m], Meghanne [name_f]Johannah[/name_f], [name_u]Brooklyn[/name_u] [name_f]Liberty[/name_f] and I’ve forgotten the other two. I remember the girls list getting to be about 3 handwritten pages long though. I had some really horrendous choices, but in the end, my assignment ended up being the most thoughtfully written, because I explained the naming process I went through to my teacher, and somewhere, I still have the assignment.

I didn’t fully tell my mum I was obsessed with names until about this past [name_f]September[/name_f], and she thought (and still thinks) it’s the coolest thing ever that I go through and spend hours analyzing statistics, finding out meanings, background, origins, etc, finding new names, rediscovering old names, she has actually been known to brag (which is embarrassing).

In high school, I only really had about 4 or 5 people who knew, all friends of mine, 3 of which being boys. [name_f]My[/name_f] best guy friends were really cool about it, and the one even went over my list with me, and told me his favourites (we were about 17). He actually happened to be a name nerd himself, which I thought was pretty cool (and if it weren’t for a few idiot moves on his part, we’d be dating, but that’s besides the point :wink: ). [name_f]My[/name_f] college classmates were all sort of into names though, except they all had this ‘brilliant’ idea of naming their first born baby [name_f]Nevaeh[/name_f] (seriously, nearly all 42 of them).

I still hide it from a lot of people though. [name_f]My[/name_f] aunt and uncles have some idea, because of blog posts I’ve done on the [name_u]Berry[/name_u] Juice blog, but most details are kept secret. [name_f]My[/name_f] grandmother, mum, sister, best friend, and cousin are all big name nerd supporters, although, my mum only knows a few names I happen to like, my sister and best friend know the majority (my best friend knowing them all).

I currently have 3 name books in my possession, one I bought for myself for my birthday, one from my sister, and another I treated myself to. I’ve been looking into getting another, but haven’t just yet, as I’ve found that lately, the internet is actually more helpful. I also spend hours making lists, and I feel like they’re never finished. Lately I’ve taken to charting statistics too (love stats to be honest!), and I’ve even made my own little graphs with markers.

I’ve also taken to keeping a binder just for names - top 1000 lists, my favourites, statistics, middle names, etc, and it’s almost sacred - no one is allowed to touch it without my permission :stuck_out_tongue:

There’s nothing wrong with just liking names though, and, both my parents (who have a tendency to swear…a lot), have instructed me to tell anyone who gives me an odd look for having name books where to go :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye: I normally sort of ignore it, or make sure I go in with someone (like my sister) and make conversation to distract from it, or sound like I’m buying it for someone who is in fact expecting.

I’d come clean about it when you’re ready, but I really wouldn’t worry too much about what others think of you, we all have our hobbies :slight_smile:

11

I’m different from many namenerds. I do not have a favorites list, much less one by letter. [name_f]My[/name_f] name lists never last long on Nameberry, because I am always striving for something polished, something I would be proud to show thepublic. Alphabetising would be an awful experience for me, LOL.

Werid, since I have mild OCD, . Very interesting story!;

Excise my horrid typinf. [name_f]My[/name_f] tablet keyboard is AWFUL.

12

I’ll just spittle off bout how my name obsessions effected my life.

I’m 22 now, but I’ve been name obsessed since I was little,though I ever felt to hide it from my family, despite getting a few eye rolls. I used to sit at the dining room table since I was 7 and just yell all the names I could remember out into the air in shouts of “Come here [name_m]David[/name_m]!” and “Where’s [name_f]Samantha[/name_f]?” to see if I could imagine ever having kids with those names. I was the youngest with a five year age gap between me and my brother, and maybe that’s why I’ve always wanted a big family which led to me being so focused on names.

Then when I was 13 I started reading and writing A LOT, collecting journals full of names, journals full of family trees I’ve made up or embellished from [name_m]Harry[/name_m] [name_m]Potter[/name_m] characters, usually plotting out all the details of the relationships and full names and characteristics of the characters in complex diagrams, charts, and lists, before I ever started even writing the fanfic. And though I was always very vague to my family about the stories and showing them my lists and journals, I didn’t hide my obsession and sometimes they humored me, like when I was 14 and insisted I was going to name a boy [name_m]Elijah[/name_m] [name_u]James[/name_u], only I would have everyone actually pronounce the J when they said it EliJuh. Though I thankfully don’t feel that way anymore, then my parents had surprised me and backed me by saying I could name my kids whatever I wanted to, that I was the one who made that decision.

When I was 17 I went to the book store with my brother and his fiance to pick a birthday present, only to want a 10,000+ [name_u]Baby[/name_u] names book, to their uncertainty. When I insisted they just shrugged and bought it and I felt embarrassed that everyone though either I or she was pregnant. The other downfall to being obsessed with names. Everyone assuming things. I still can’t talk baby names near or around my own fiance’s family because they want grand kids and get torn between getting excited and hopping around hopeful “are you pregnant??” and the parental “You need to wait, you’re not married yet!” When all I did was hear a new name to ring up to my picky picky fiance’s attention.

[name_f]My[/name_f] oldest brothers wife actually came to me for advice, knowing how much I loved names, to help figure out how she would name her fourth child after my brother if it was (another) girl. Though aggravatingly enough my other brothers wife keeps wanting steal a few of my chosen names I’ve mentioned for her future children)

But since I never had my own family or close friends snub my love of names too much and occasionally humor me when I tossed names off them for opinions, I’ve come across a problem that has left me worried and hanging out at Nameberry now.

I spend my free time writing the same names over and over, instead of counting sheep I create fictional family trees, and eventually names start to feel burnt out. Names I loved and were determined on using before have now become old and don’t do it for me anymore, there’s rarely a name I haven’t heard or considered. And most of those just don’t do it for me. And the ones that did I’ve few and far between kept. And then out of my short list I have my fiance peering over my shoulder and putting most of them down, without wanting to really get into names or putting opinions on names past that.

So I start to feel like I’m burning myself out on names and running out of names I still enjoy. But I’d rather have spent a few years seeing if I still like a name then give it to my kid and realize a few years later I hate their name, so maybe it’s worth it?

It doesn’t help that I’ve got at least an acute form of Synesthesia. Something I only put a name to after discovering this site.

13

Yeah, definitely. I feel weird always looking for baby names since I’m a teen, and I don’t even want kids when I’m older! I remember in 5th grade I said something about old names, and my friend is just like, “Why do you always talk about names?”. [name_f]My[/name_f] sister makes fun of me when I’m looking up names. If I suggest an unusual name, she’s always like, “That’s a [name_f]Tia[/name_f] name”. Which I don’t mind, I say the same thing when she names her stuffed bear “Beary” or Dog “Dog Dog”, or her blanket “Blanky”, and her pink dog, “[name_m]Pinky[/name_m]”. I could go on and on, lol.

It’s awkward because why are we even looking up names if we aren’t looking to name a baby? It DOES make us seem “baby-obsessed”, as another said, which I really don’t like, haha. Therefore, I just keep to myself and privately look for names. If someone asks why I am looking for names it’s just “for a book” or “for sims”. Which is true sometimes, but other times it’s just for fun!

I seriously would not call my love for names an obsession, however.

14

Obsessions are part of my life. I first heard the term at age 10, my mom said I was obsessed with a cooking show. Not everyone has obsessions, and I can respect that. Myself having OCD and Aspergers tough , I’ve just always had them.

I don’t want kids either, but ii a, a writer. Sometimes I say im loking for character names.

15

I have loved names since I was 13. I posted on the [name_u]Baby[/name_u] Names World forums until they were shut down.
I mostly keep my name obsession a secret, but will gladly talk about it if I feel comfortable. It does feel like an odd hobby!

[name_u]Baby[/name_u] names either make me incredibly happy or very sad. I’m 22 and have watched all my friends marry and get pregnant while I’m still living at home getting a degree. You can say I have baby fever depression. I have good days mostly, but on the occasional bad day, I can barely think of little [name_u]Ruby[/name_u] or [name_m]Leo[/name_m] without getting a little weepy. I want to hold them and get their names embroidered on blankets.
I want my favorite name and a baby too!

But yes, I do feel similarly to you. Most people think collecting names is odd if you aren’t expecting. They just don’t get it.

16

I’m a teen and it’s definitely hard sometimes to talk names with other people. [name_f]My[/name_f] mum knows I like names but she doesn’t know just how much I love them sometimes she’ll tell me that she met someone at work with a certain name.

I’ve talked names with a few of my friends but not all of them. I just don’t think they’re as interested as me. I know all of my friends first and middle names and for some of them what they could have been called but weren’t and I evaluate the combos in my head. I’m glad that I feel that my friends won’t be they type to name their kids super popular names (I hope).

I don’t have a baby name book because I don’t have the guts to go to the bookshop and buy it or to ask my parents to buy it online. I just hope my mum get enough hints and buys me one :slight_smile:

18

No one knows I am a name nerd except you guys. :slight_smile: in my wildest dreams I never imagined an entire community of Name Nerds. I did it in secret, scribbling names in diaries, notepads, by myself. I knew it was weird. I thought I was weird. I have had crushes on names since I was like 8. I read fantasy and sci fi books and wrote down all the names. I researched the names in Greek myths, then Celtic, then Scandanavian. I had a tryst with occult names: vampire, witch, goth-y names. I created new names in class when I was bored. On the bus ride home I distracted myself by mentally creating new name combinations. Last year, I was obsessed with Bible names and lately I am obsessed with obscure Victorian names. [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] IT.