'This is it' name moment

I wanna ask you – do you believe, that when you’re looking for the perfect name for your baby, you have to browse the names until the moment, when you literally feel, that this is it!
[name_u]Or[/name_u] maybe you prefer to create name lists and then you strike off the ones you don’t like that much…
If you believe in the ‘it moment’, or you’ve already experienced it, I wanna ask you, what if weeks, months pass and this moment never comes? Would you force yourself to choose a name you don’t 100% love and try to grow into loving it later?

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I narrowed it down to 3-4 names. I asked friends/family what their favorite name was.

I found myself disappointed when a specific name wasn’t picked or elated when that name was picked.

I was surprised that this was how I found the right names… I thought I would have a “this is it” moment.

I think I would “settle” on a name if I had issues picking a name with a partner or if trying to find the “right” name was causing too much stress and anguish. I just know so many parents who did feel like they “settled” and grew to love the name on their child.


We sort of had a “This is it!” moment with our DD, but it wasn’t necessarily a pure eureka moment. We had been bouncing names back and forth names and hadn’t really found one we both loved when my husband suggested [name_f]Ada[/name_f]. We both loved it, but initially, I wanted to find a longer name for [name_f]Ada[/name_f] to be a nickname for. When I couldn’t find a longer name I liked for [name_f]Ada[/name_f], I said “Eh, just [name_f]Ada[/name_f] is good!” Now I’m really really glad that we went that route because I love her name so much, and I can’t imagine calling her anything else.

Now that we’re trying for #2, I feel like I have almost had that moment with a boy name, but since we’re not pregnant yet I’m hesitant to say it’s the one. Hopefully when we do get pregnant, it will clearly be a “this is it” moment.

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I do think, at least for me, that there is that “this it it moment.” I definitely had that moment when my husband and I decided to go with the name [name_f]Bria[/name_f] [name_u]Saige[/name_u]; it just felt right!


Aww, I love that!!:heart_eyes:

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Nope we didn’t with our first, I had a name I felt was ‘it’ but my husband didn’t love it. So we found a compromise that we both liked and could work with the nickname I loved, and now I can’t imagine her being named anything else


I don’t particularly believe in “this is it!” because I’ve felt that way about a handful of names over the years and eventually I change my mind / get bored / find something I “love more”.

We have a long list and a short list that are forever changing. Perhaps I’ll feel more “this is it” when I’m looking at a little human that I have to label… shrug

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I definitely had a “this is it” moment with my first. The second I saw her name on a list, I knew it was the one. We actually came across our dd2’s name after deciding on dd1’s name. We were considering it for her middle name but we decided we really loved it and would hold onto it in case we had another girl. So glad we did!

With dd2, about 2 weeks before she was born, I had it in my head we should switch her name to [name_u]Briar[/name_u]. So glad my dh told me I was hormonal because he was right. :joy: her name is perfect for her and I was crazy to think [name_u]Briar[/name_u] would suit her better.


We definitely had a “This is it!” moment with our first daughter. We had no names on our list that we really loved and just stumbled on her name and knew it was right. With this pregnancy, we had a list of 4 names we liked a lot and could feasibly see ourselves using, so we figured we’d just take the list with us to the hospital and figure out which name seemed to fit since none of them were sticking out to us over the others. It wasn’t until we altered the spelling just slightly of one of the names on our list and mentioned it to a friend (and saw her enthusiastic reaction) that we realized we actually really liked that one too. So, we did have a “this is it!” moment with our second daughter too, but it was much more subtle and took longer than the first time. That being said, if we never felt that, we would have chosen one of the names on our list. Our daughter would have to have a name whether we had the “this is it!” moment or not, so yes, we would have chosen a name and learned to love it.

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I think it depends. So with my first born we were quite set on a name and then about 4 months into the pregnancy a name came to me in a dream. It was really vivid and overwhelming for me to not ignore and I told my partner and he instantly liked it too. So that was our ‘this is the name!’ moment. It felt right and after that, no other names were contemplated because we were very much set on his name. His middle name was more straightforward because I wanted to name my son or daughter ( my first child after my mum of whom I am close to) so it was going to be either [name_u]George[/name_u] or [name_f]Georgia[/name_f] after [name_f]Georgina[/name_f]. Well he was a boy so his middle was [name_u]George[/name_u] and it was a bonus because the middle name really fit nicely with his first name.

Second child, whole different story!! We had a handful of boys names we liked and in the end we picked a name which my partner’s side of the family really liked and was encouraging. I liked the name but on the proviso that we used one of the nickname options for it, which I was really warm too. In the end the nickname I wanted never caught on, which felt disappointing.
I like the name but it didn’t really feel like we picked it because it was ‘the name’. I wish in hindsight now that I had not decided his name until I saw his face because it took a while for him to suit and grow into his name if that makes sense. ( He totally looks like his name now)
His middle name I had a change of heart with. We had picked out a middle for him which j had always loved but it just didn’t fit that well and I think I was trying to make it work. In the end, my sister suggested his middle name. ( We were bouncing names back and forth for months :joy:) and when she suggested this name we have for his middle. We were both like YES. So I guess that was a [name_f]Eureka[/name_f] moment.

Third child ( TTC) I’ve literally looked at every name under the sun and in the depths of nameberry :joy: I’ve done a full circle though and come back to the boy/girl names I love. Despite some criticism and [name_m]Luke[/name_m] warm responses. I just know they are the names that I want.

What I would say then is that basically unless you don’t have a [name_f]Eureka[/name_f] moment with the name then it’s best to go in with a handful of names when the baby is born… As it is likely that the [name_f]Eureka[/name_f] moment will be when you see their face. That’s when you know… Oh he so looks like our “” or yes she really suits the name “”"" kinda thing.
[name_f]Hope[/name_f] that all made sense.

Just to add. We have a name we are set on for a third boy. But if we have a girl, we have her first name and will be deciding her middle when we see her. So it’s kinda half and half approach on the third baby if she is a girl.

I had a “this is it!” name for my son but his dad didn’t like it so we compromised on my #2 favourite. I’m bummed I never got to use the name for him but I do wonder if I have another, that the name won’t have the “this is it!” power it did the first time. Then I’ll be sad :sweat_smile:

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We had the “this is it!” moment going through lists of names for baby girl. Hubby said “I like that!” instead of “meh” or “ok” lol. (I only read him names I liked lol). Once he said that I realized I loved the name too.

We already had an honor middle in mind for a girl, so at least we just had to find one name!

But I don’t think you have to have that kind of lightbulb moment to choose the right name for your baby, and I honestly didn’t expect to have it.

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For us, we had a this is it moment with our son’s name. We both felt it with his first name and the moment we came up with his middle names. It felt like a magic spark.

For a possible [name_u]Baby[/name_u] #2, I think we will most likely find ourselves scouring name lists until we find one we both like. We have two solid girl choices and a few “eh” boy options but nothing that screams this is it. It sounds sad and I feel guilty about it but it is just how things are working out. If we still couldn’t decide by the time the baby would be born, I know we’d just force ourselves to choose just so we could get the paperwork filed. I’m sure we’d grow to love the name in time, once we’d be able to associate it with our child :slight_smile:

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Why is #3 so hard!?! :sob:
We named our first boy right after seeing him at the 20w ultrasound. The second we debated back and forth between a couple names until he was born … but #3… We joke that his name is [name_m]Trey[/name_m] [name_u]Quentin[/name_u] as in 3rd kid/5th family member :rofl::rofl::rofl:

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With my first daughter, I had two names that I really liked and one clearly fit her. She was a foster baby so we had the benefit of knowing her little personality. We chose the name right after we got permission to pursue adoption so the decision was made in the matter of a weekend, not nine months. But the choice was clear.

For my second, I was sure I’d use a long time favorite if we had a boy. Then I had a this is it moment for a girl’s name and realized that I wasn’t as excited about the boy’s name. So I went back to the books so to speak. I made lists of boy names that went well stylistically with my daughter’s name, and my son’s name just kept popping up. It delighted me, so I kept writing it down with potential middle names and other choices. I kept coming back to that name. So it was more of a this is it process than a moment.