Thoughts on using a first name a friend just used as a middle?

[name_m]Just[/name_m] curious on other members thoughts on this issue. I’m currently expecting little one number 2, and have known from the start what name I’d like to use if it’s a girl. Meanwhile, a friend just had a beautiful baby girl, and it turns out her middle name is the same I had my heart set on to use as a first name. It’s a name that’s very low on the current Social Security popularity list but is still quite familiar, and far more frequently used as a middle name these days than a first. So, is it a faux pas to hold on to using this name? Our babies will be about 4-5 months apart. Though we’re not particularly close to other couple, we are very fond of them and do have the same social circle. I haven’t broached the issue with them yet, but I probably will shortly. Am I making too big a deal of this, or not enough?

Thanks so much for sharing any thoughts!

It’s not an issue at all. Unless they call their little girl by her middle name, I don’t understand why it would ever be a conflict in your social circle.

Talking to these people about using the name for yourself is purely a courtesy on your part. If they accuse you of “stealing” the name, that just sounds petty and childish. If it will clear your conscience, then go ahead, but otherwise I don’t think you need to ask permission to use any name.

I’d ask for permission simply out of courtesy but if they give you the go ahead why not. But a friendship is worth more than any name.

Absolutely not an issue. [name_m]Even[/name_m] if she had used the name as her daughters first name, she does not own the name and you have no way of knowing if the two of you or your children will even be friends in the next 5, 10 years. Good luck and congratulations!