This is exactly how I’m playin it, for now. I guess I’ll forgo the vacation home on [name]Vashon[/name].
After reading everyone’s story, I feel very lucky that so far I have no real physical obstacles to pregnancy, that I know of. Knock on wood! I feel for all you ladies who have been doing this for a long time. I can only imagine that it would be really disappointing to keep getting your hopes up every month. I hope you all get your positives really soon!
@Poppy528 I understand how you feel! I wonder all the time if I am doing the right thing by having children. My family has a severe history of mental illness and I am prone to depression and have been since childhood. I wonder if it’s fair to bring a child into that environment, with such a high risk of passing whatever genetic predisposition to the “crazies” I may have. I just keep telling myself that if it was not mental illness, it could be something else I passed along. No one is perfect and everyone inherits both good and bad from their parents. I have had everything under control for a while and luckily I have been able to forgo meds. I find that I can control my emotions with excercise and diet. If I don’t excercise, though, I get extremely depressed and anxious very quickly. It’s like a switch that gets turned on and until I force myself to excercise I feel that life is impossible and nothing will ever be good or happy again. I am especially freaked by the possibilty of post partum depression. It just scares me to think about it! I guess I’m just putting the cart before the horse. I have to get pregnant first!
Since I am just at the very beginning of TTC I have not learned very much about the different methods and types of aids that enhance fertility. The only thing that I have been using is some Wondfo ovulation test strips that a friend gave me. She swears that she got pregnant after using these the first month. I think it was probably luck, but it can’t hurt to try, right? I have also been taking folic acid.
I think it is perfectly normal-- and very mature-- to spend some time introspecting about reproduction if you have a condition that is at least partially genetic. But here’s the way I look at it-- you, currently, are living with that condition (whatever it may be). [name]Do[/name] you feel that life is not worth living? If the alternative were non-existence, which do you think your baby would choose?
Incidentally there are certainly conditions / diseases that, for me at least, could tip the balance towards non-existence. I firmly believe there ARE fates worse than death.
@poppy and violetindigo, I understand your concerns about the possibility of passing on physical or mental illnesses to your children. But look at it this way. If your parents had known that you would each have the physical or mental struggles that you have, do you think that they should have just decided not to give you life? [name]Do[/name] your struggles make life not worth living? I don’t mean to belittle your struggles in any way! I too have struggled with depression, anxiety, and a host of other problems. I too worry about passing on these troubles to my kids. But there is so much more to life than these problems. To bring a child into the world is to give him or her the full experience of LIFE, with all of its love, laughter, holidays, vacations, birthday parties, family, friends… You might pass on your sicknesses, and your child, as a teenager, might hate you for it for a while. But it balances out–no, it MORE than balances out–by all of the amazing things you can offer to a child. [name]Don[/name]'t consider yourselves poor candidates for reproducing just because you have problems. Darwinian ideology led to the Holocaust, because people believed that only the “best” deserved to live. But we have all learned from that colossal mistake. It is not possible for you to bring a life into this world that is not worth living. If you decide not to have children for any reason, that is completely your prerogative; if it would put your health at risk, or if you believe that your health would disable you from safely raising a child, that is completely understandable. But I don’t believe that you should let these fears that you’ve expressed about passing on poor genetics stop you from having a baby. 
[name]EDIT[/name]: [name]Blade[/name] posted while I was writing mine; I didn’t mean to copy her!
Violetindigo, thank you for sharing your story. It’s easier to stay strong if you know you’re not alone.
You ladies have already been very comforting and loving. My OPK gave me a happy face this morning so we’ll see what happens in 2 weeks or so!
hugs to you of you struggling with health issues - they make mine seem so small in comparison.
I have been feeling sluggish, achy, tender and nauseous all day. I’m convinced that it’s because my Mother-in-[name]Law[/name] got all of us sick over the weekend. My sister is convinced that our miracle has happened.
Having only been pregnant once before, 5 years ago, my only symptoms then were exhaustion and tender breasts. While I have both of those… it could just as easily be PMS.
Part of me is desperate to believe my sister, but the majority of me just thinks that I am just succumbing to this nasty ick going around. T -5 days until we know who’s right. ([name]Cross[/name] your fingers that it’s not me.)
@grecianern, the stomach bug typically only lasts about 24 hours, so if your symptoms persist much longer than a day, you’ll have good reason to hope. [name]Hope[/name] you get your [name]New[/name] Year’s miracle!
Thanks Alzora!
I actually slept 14 hours after I got home friday night… waking up every 2 hours on the :45s… 11:45, 1:45 and so on until morning. I was “just this side of nauseous” (my new term) again [name]Saturday[/name] night, with the achy feeling. Again briefly on [name]Sunday[/name] night with a little dizziness - though [name]Sunday[/name] cleared up a lot faster than the 2 previous nights. It’s just a waiting game I guess.
I am not wasting a test this month until I am officially late. So… [name]Wednesday[/name] after work. 
This is a fantastic post! I have loved reading everyones stories, although I really feel for everyone with health issues. I am keeping my fingers crossed for ALL of you that you get positive news this year, hopefully sooner than later.
We are trying for a baby too. We started ttc in [name]December[/name] 2012 and we are waiting for the period to show (or not). We already have one son, born in 2011, he is almost 2. I fell pregnant for the second time at the beginning of 2012, but had a miscarriage, sadly, in [name]March[/name] 2012. My other half and I are getting married in [name]April[/name] so I am hoping to be expecting by then. I have Post [name]Natal[/name] Depression, and an Underactive Thyroid, both of which I am on medication for. So, hopefully it won’t be too difficult third time around. My first pregnancy was so straightforward and I had no health issues. This time I have the Depression and Thyroid condition to put up with, but keeping positive. you never know what the future will bring, and even if I cannot have another baby, I have been so blessed with my son, and I am eternally grateful for him. He is completely healthy and happy and handsome! I am one very proud mummy.
Hoping you are all blessed in 2013 too! Good luck xxx
[name]Welcome[/name] aboard, [name]Hala[/name]! I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling with the depression and thyroid issues. I’ve read that post-partum depression can be really tough and scary, so I’m glad to hear that it’s being treated. Hoping that passes for you soon and you get a sibling for your son.
@Grecianern, I know I shouldn’t be excited that your feelings of sickness have held on for several days, but in this case, it IS kind of exciting!
[name]Hi[/name] ladies! [name]Hala[/name] you are so brave and i’m very sorry to hear about your loss.
Thanks Alzora… but unfortunately, I was/am just sick.
My sister kept suggesting things like pneumonia, etc. and I was feeling so crappy last night. The Masochist in me won, and I took a test this morning.
NEGATIVE
Ugh. It’s so hard… and at the same time, I had a feeling that it wasn’t happening. So… a little depressed, a little sick, probably PMS-ing… maybe I should go into hiding for a few days?
Anyone know how to deal with infertility and children? My 4-yr old son is almost to the point of tears because he wants a baby so badly. And he can’t understand why everyone else gets a baby and he doesn’t. I keep telling him that we’re trying… but he sees it happening for his little daycare friends so easily. The guilt over this is almost unbearable.
Thank you for the welcome ladies PND is horrible, as you don’t feel like yourself anymore. When I’m not on medication, I am just a different person. I am not me. On medication, I’m fine. I hate being on medication though, and have tried to come off them, but I feel so terrible and I do not think it fair on my son for me to be ill like that, so I take them as I am better with him and better around him. I do hope to come off them in the future however. PND is something I would never have, our son was planned, I’m in a stable, loving relationship, I was physically healthy during the pregnancy, our baby was healthy, and I loved him so much from the moment I had the positive pregnancy test. But I still had PND. It’s a very strange thing, that.
Thank you for saying that I am brave, but I Have been very lucky. Our miscarriage was an early one, at 7 weeks. Quite natural, painless and no medical intervention was needed. It was upsetting, but it happened. We have close friends of ours who lost their son literally days before his due date. She still had to go through the birth, and then there was the funeral. It was heartbreaking. They truly are brave, for getting through that. I cannot begin to imagine what that is like.
News update: took a pregnancy test today and it was a negative. So now awaiting Aunt F. [name]Joy[/name]. [name]Ah[/name] well. [name]Roll[/name] on next month!
[name]How[/name] is everybody else doing? Xxx
Aw man, Grecianern and [name]Hala[/name]. 
I’m sorry to hear about your disappointment. @Grecianern, I can’t offer any advice in dealing with infertility and children, as it’s something I’ve never experienced. I have a hard time dealing with the wait MYSELF, and your son is only four so it has to be so frustrating for him, and for you. What if you sat down with him and talked about how this is a very special time for it to be [name]JUST[/name] him and you. Plan special things with him–maybe day trips–that you wouldn’t be able to do with a baby, and explain to him that you want to make some fun memories of just the two of you (well include your DH on the fun!) while you wait. Make it a fun phase for him. Call it The Waiting Game and plan goofy activities that he would like for every weekend until you get your positive. [name]Do[/name] spontaneous fun things–wake him up in the middle of the night to go outside and play in the snow, or to watch a movie together in sleeping bags in the living room. Tell him that while you wait, you want to make memories that you couldn’t do with a baby in the house.
@[name]Hala[/name], your miscarriage may have been different than some other people’s experiences, but it was still a major loss to you, and you have a right to grieve over that. [name]Even[/name] though it happened early in the pregnancy, you still lost your child whom you had grown to love so much, so fast. You ARE brave to have gone through something like that, and I commend you for taking care of yourself for your son’s sake. I understand the hesitations about being on medication for long periods of time, but in this case it sounds like it is really good for you and your family. Hang in there. These weeks will fly by for you and soon you can try again.
@[name]Poppy[/name], I’m just about in my two-week wait. I’m a little irregular with ovulating, so we try to go for about five days straight each month around the time of ovulation. We will end it either today or tomorrow, and AF would come between [name]January[/name] 21-24. I’m already dreading the two-week wait. It gets harder each month. Now we are approaching my baby sister’s due date and my best friend’s due date, so I’m getting more and more emotional and restless about having my own.
Thank you for your lovely words Alzora.
I hate the two week wait it drives me nuts! Especially when you think you are having symptoms, or what you think are symptoms, then you get a negative test and the symptoms must be in your head or pms. Oh the fun of womanhood. I thought I was having symptoms, similar to my previous pregnancies and all! Xxx
I have missed so much, I want to welcome everyone that I haven’t already. So many different stories but so similar in our desire for children. I am glad I have somewhere to come to vent etc. We were to start our second round of clomid already but due to me getting sick and then having an allergic reaction the medicine my family dr gave me, I am now on a 15 day treatment of prednisone. (apprently I have a “rare” allergy to antihistamines(benadryl and ed-a-hist to be exact), who knew). I’m going to call my ob/gyn office today since af has still not shown up, today is cycle day 39 and ask if I can take provera and clomid at the same time I am taking the prednisone? If it isnt one thing it seems to be another. But I know I need to be healthy first.
[name]How[/name] is everyone else?
My cousin and his wife just announced they are pregnant with their second child(an unexpected pregnancy, they have a 10 month old), they went to fb asking name suggestions and are actually going to use the name combo I suggested if its a boy([name]Abel[/name] [name]Alexander[/name]). [name]Even[/name] though I have to admit I was a tiny bit jealous, I am extremely happy for them and super excited about the name.
Aunt [name]Flo[/name] arrived today! [name]Will[/name] be trying next month then good luck ladies, sending baby dust your way xxx
Well, so much for starting ttc this month. My SO will be out of town for work when I should be ovulating Guess we’ll have to wait till next month! Good luck, ladies
@stuffd, how frustrating! Depending on how long he’ll be out of town, you could still try this month. Sperm can live inside your body for about three days, so even if you’re able to do it up to three days before you ovulate, you would still have a fair chance.
@ hala, baby dust back to you for next cycle!! stupid aunt flo
@ stuffd, thats frustrating…but alzora is right…maybe you will still catch that egg!!