I’m not a mom/mom-to-be and i also dont want this to sound judging but i was quite shocker. The readon im posting this is because i dont know if im over-reacting or not.
Today I saw a boy walking home from school alone. I know him very well he is a close family friend, Iv knew him since he was a baby. Anyway, today when I was walking home, I saw him and I stopped to say hi. I looked around to see if I could see his mum I asked him where his mum was. He said in the house, I was a little confused but didnt say anything. He said bye and off he went, I shouted after him and said does he want me to walk him home he shouted no then ran away.
I felt guilty for letting him run home alone but then I thought WHY is he aloud to go home by himself.
Ok this shocked my because the boy is seven. And to get home he needs to cross a extremely busy road. Cars come from five different directions and after that its a five min walk to his house, with a less busy road.
Am I over-reacting? Is 7 old enough to walk home from school? What age do or will your children walk to school?
I was 11 when I went to school myself, I did have to get on the bus but one stop later my cousin would get on. And we would you let you child do this?
I am not a mother but I know I never walked home at the age. My parents would either pick me up or walk home with me. I think 7 is a little young especially in a dangerous street like the one you described. I think middle school would be a good time to allow kids to walk home by their self.
I personally think that is really, really young to be walking anywhere by yourself especially with such a busy road. I’m not a mom or anything yet either, but I do have younger siblings and I’m an aunt. Us kids weren’t allowed to walk alone in the store until we were around 13 or so, let alone cross the road. Was my mom overprotective? Some may say that and can say that if they wish. However, my stepdad is a cop, and he worked so many missing children cases or any case involving children, so he knew the dangers and they acted accordingly. My kids won’t be walking alone to school. [name_u]Ever[/name_u]. If we live close enough for me to drive them, then that’s what we will do. Otherwise if they can walk, it will be with other people at least one older teen, or myself/husband.
It’s not worth the risk. Look at cases such as [name_m]Etan[/name_m] Patz? The first day he was allowed to walk to school by himself, he disappeared and was killed. [name_m]Plenty[/name_m] of kids take the subway or walk alone and nothing happens, but i wouldn’t want to take that chance.
I walked to and from school alone at 6. Then again, my school was a block from our house and we knew all the neighbours. (If you walked out the door to the corner, you could see the school.) Almost all the kids in our neighbourhood did the same. I don’t have kids yet, but for my own children, it would depend on how far the school is. Our closest school at present is probably a 20 minute walk, so I wouldn’t let a child walk that far until s/he was a bit older and more mature.
I was left responsible for younger children at age 6. However, my mother had emotional issues/mental illness, and got paranoid about leaving my sister and me alone when we were older, so stuck me w/a babysitter at 12, even though I babysat regularly. As to walking, we always lived in decent neighborhoods without much traffic, so the weather/distance was a much bigger issue. 1/3 of a mile to the busstop and we were on our own w/heavy books, instruments and near blizzard conditions at times.
I just wanted to comment real quick. I’m not a mom, but there’s an elementary school (K-2) in my neighborhood and the accompanying elementary school (3-5) is just outside my neighborhood and across one of the busiest roads in town. I see little ones walking home by themselves all the time. The elementary school that’s 3rd-5th grade has a crossing guard that gets the kids safely across the road and into our neighborhood. After that it’s no problem. As for the kindergarten-2nd grade school, most walkers have a parent that meets them at the school or somewhere along the way. I have seen a few kids walking home alone, but again, the school is inside our neighborhood.
Is there a crossing guard or a crosswalk to help him get across the road? Or is he just playing Frogger?
Seriously? Yeah, I wouldn’t let a seven-year-old cross a major road unsupervised.
Just to clarify… I wouldn’t be worried about abduction. I’d be worried about him getting hit by a car. The busy road I was talking about in my previous response is a two-lane. When you say five different directions, I’m imagining the interstate. I wouldn’t let a seven-year-old walk across the interstate on his own. I wouldn’t even walk across the interstate on my own. I wouldn’t walk across an interstate at all.
I would allow my kids to walk home at grade 2 age, of course not if it was a very far distance or sketchy neighborhood or busy traffic. Hopefully also with a partner, and not completely alone. My brother used to walk home from school alone when he was about 8, because I was just a baby and my mother was pregnant again and exhausted. Its not a bad thing - it teaches them some independence and makes them feel like they are responsible and you trust them. I think parents these days are overprotective of their children. Obviously this boy even though he is seven, has learned about what to do if a stranger talks to him (obviously you might not be a stranger but he might not have recognized you or known you well enough to trust you) - he did the right thing, he shouted NO and ran home. My only concern would be the traffic but hopefully he is walking home when lots of other kids are walking home too & other adults are probably around.
Now my dad used to take the bus alone through downtown Vancouver when he was 6. That is nuts.
I was walking 2 km to school, through a residential neighborhood at age 5. There were lots of kids, two crossing guards at the busier streets and no real traffic or sketchy neighborhoods. I’m from a small place and it seemed and seems now, to be normal.
I think this is something that was extremely common in the past, but almost unthinkable now. I know my mom and dad were allowed to walk themselves to school as soon as they were old enough to go to school. My dad and his siblings played alone in the woods behind their house. My [name_f]MIL[/name_f] tells a story about how her mom sent her to the store alone to buy bread with the money pinned on her jacket when she was like 3 years old. And they lived in the [name_m]Bronx[/name_m]! But that’s just the way it was. People weren’t paranoid about their kids getting kidnapped. They thought it was important to teach them independence. Now, we worry and hover. I’m not saying I’m any different, though. The elementary school isn’t far from our house and there aren’t any major streets to cross, but I still don’t think I would let my daughter walk alone. Like, ever. Not because I want to coddle her. Not because I wouldn’t trust her. I’m just scared and feel like there is safety in numbers. I could imagine letting her walk with friends without an adult at that age, depending on how trustworthy I felt she and her friends were I guess. But, nope, never alone.
I was probably 8 when I first started walking home from the bus stop. However, it was less than half a mile on an empty country road where you could hear the occasional car coming from a mile away. I’d be comfortable with a fairly young child taking that walk alone.
I’m 20 and I would probably avoid crossing that road if I could!
theres no real reason a kid needs to be allowed to walk to school in the first place at any age, i’ll make whatever sacrifices i have to in order to drive them myself.
convenience isnt a reason to chance your childs life.
the only time id consider it is probably when they were in high school or old enough to drive and we didnt have a car for them. ideally there would be kids in the neighborhood they’d walk with and it wouldnt be far. i knew kids that still biked miles to school during morning traffic and it seemed ridiculous that one it took them so long and two that they basically had to take bird baths once they got there so they werent sweaty & stinky all day.
unless you want to be that parent that looks confused on the evening news asking ‘how could this happen?’ when your kid is hit by a car or abducted, why take the chance?
or even confused when the principal calls saying your kid skipped class.
sadly ‘knowing’ your neighbor doesnt mean much - lots of people new [name_u]Ariel[/name_u] Castro. living in a ‘good neighborhood’, teaching your kid ‘better’ than skipping school, all dont matter - other peoples choices are out of our control…but whether your kid walks to school alone is completely up to you.
trusting your kid has nothing to do with it. of course id trust them to walk a mile alone. but the rest of the world when every night some kid has been abused or killed?
im not particularly paranoid or worried about such things for my future children, it just seems theres only one choice.
Some of these responses are a bit dramatic. Considerably more children per year are killed in automobile accidents than by murderers. A child is way more likely to be injured or killed while you’re driving them to school than abducted and murdered. Obviously your neighbourhood, traffic conditions, etc., are factors not to be taken lightly, but it’s a bit much to assume that walking to school will lead to being abducted.
I think it depends on the child. I was allowed to walk the block from school to my grandmother’s house around seven or so but it wasn’t across busy streets. My dad used to walk a mile to kindergarten each day.
Have you heard about free range kids? (http://www.freerangekids.com/) It’s a movement to let kids have more freedom and not be as overprotective. Kids are actually safer now then they’ve ever been during any time in history. It’s exceedingly rare for a child to be abducted by a stranger. Your child is far more likely to be struck by lightning then abducted. And Maggiefromcanada is very right that they are in more danger being driven to school since so many children die each year car accidents.
I would say that it depends on the temperment of the kid, the safety of the route, and the distance. Mostly the temperment of the kid, really. I lived in LA for five years and used to see kids that age taking the subway and city bus alone to get to school all of the time.
My sister and I used to walk a mile to and from the bus stop for school. She is two years older than me, I walked with her from kindergarten on, so she was seven and I was five. I am not sure how old she was when she started walking to and from the bus stop on her own, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it was kindergarten on. We grew up in a very rural area so traffic wasn’t an issue.
My husband, son and I now live in a very neighborhood-y neighborhood. There is a school within walking distance that I hope our son gets into (its a magnet, so it’s a lottery to get in.) I would probably walk him there to start with, but depending on how level headed he is at that point, I might let him walk alone at age seven. He is not quite two now, so I can’t really tell yet if he’s going to be able to walk home alone at age seven. But definitely by nine, I would think.
Also, the article notes, “Back in the 1970s, 80 percent of British 7- and 8-year-olds were allowed to go to school unsupervised. By 1990, the percentage was 10 percent.”
I do agree many parents are overprotective now, but in the 1970s, kids also rode in cars with no car seats or seat belts and played with mercury thermometers, because parents were less aware of safety.
I might let a mature 7 year old walk a block or so to school on a very safe, quiet street if other children were around.
It’s going to depend very much on my child, the neighborhood, etc. I started walking to school at age 11. That seems like a reasonable age for most kids…but a more trusting/gullible child who might fall for a stranger’s ploys might not earn that privilege for a few more years. Or a child who has difficulty focusing and might forget to watch for traffic.
I’d say between the ages of 9-13 most children with no special needs should be able to walk to a neighborhood school alone. Kids develop at different rates. Some 7 year olds seem like virtual babies and others can run with preteens.