Alright, I imagine this is a topic everyone finds them self crossing, right? Well, I know for me it’s happened a lot lately. I feel myself going through it again with two names right now. I’ve had both on my list for atleast five years, maybe four. Both of them I heard on tv, one being a tv show and one being a movie. They both have family middle names. I keep staring at them because they’re at the end of my list and I don’t feel attached to them anymore. I just feel tired of them.
I feel like taking them off the list and then relooking at them again months later might help, but I’m not sure if that will do it. I feel like mixing some of the names up. For example, I was looking at one of my other combo’s and thought maybe putting one of those middle names with that name might be better, and finding a new middle name for the name I feel tired of. I dont really know what to do but I know I need to do something with it. What is something you do that helps when your like this?
I fell out of the names that were my top for each gender for years ([name_f]Florence[/name_f] and [name_m]Theodore[/name_m]) not long ago. I was very hesitant to take them off of my list and I was thinking on it for a good few months. Then I realised I wouldn’t actually lose anything from just taking a break from them, you know? Beyond just sentimentality, anyway. So I took a break, and that was that. Now, I’ve actually re-added them to my list in some form (my top combos now are [name_f]Flora[/name_f] [name_f]Beatrix[/name_f] [name_f]Sybil[/name_f] and [name_m]Arthur[/name_m] [name_m]Theodore[/name_m] [name_m]Jack[/name_m]).
Anyway, my advice would be to take a break, or re-work your combos (imo, combos make a massive difference on how you feel about a singular name).
I usually just remove them from the list, and if I fall in love with them again I can easily add them back in, although that’s mostly for names lower on my list. I had some time where I decided my favourite name for probably 2 or so years at the time ([name_f]Pandora[/name_f]) wasn’t the one, and I preferred another ([name_f]Lyra[/name_f]). So I did have [name_f]Lyra[/name_f] as my favourite name for a while, with [name_f]Pandora[/name_f] second, and taking a break made me realise I do really love [name_f]Pandora[/name_f], and I went back to her pretty quickly. [name_m]Even[/name_m] now I get shaky and I’m thinking of alternative girls’ names for my ideal sibset, but I’ve taken to noting down the options, and not actually altering my list. I’ve found it helps weigh up the possibilities and satisfy my curiousity a bit.
And like @[name_f]Millie[/name_f] mentioned, it’s less jarring to keep the name in the middle or in so,e form on your list. I like to think if I actually used it and regretted not putting it as a first, there’s still an option of using the middle.
Also sometimes I do find a really good combo keeps a name on my list, so revising or refreshing a combo can persuade me to leave it on.
When I’m starting to fall out of love with a name my first step is to refresh them with new, interesting combos. Then, if that doesn’t work, I’ll start looking into new nicknames or variants to spice it up a bit and the name sort of evolves. If neither of those steps work the name would be sent to ‘The [name_m]Land[/name_m] of Lost Names’, a list I maintain on my computer that’s home to all of my combos of yesteryear. I revisit it on occasion for inspiration or to bring a name back that sparks my interest again. I get attached to my names / combos and like to keep them around.
I directly remove them from my list, if I keep going back to them, I’ll just re add them.
It’s not such a big deal, and there is no space, at least imo, for names I don’t absolutely love.
If I have kids in the future, there is no way I’ll give them names I don’t love, or a name I know from previous experience that I’ll get tired of.
I loved [name_f]Lola[/name_f] for years and it was my No. 1 girls name for ages, with [name_u]Baylor[/name_u] being No. 2. I began to fall out of love with them for one reason or another and after much time and consideration, removed them from my list. I replaced [name_f]Lola[/name_f] with [name_f]Lula[/name_f] and completely got rid of [name_u]Baylor[/name_u]. I got rid of [name_m]Caden[/name_m] too and swapped it for [name_m]Caspian[/name_m]. If I ever decided that I liked them again then I’d just put them back on my list.
So about 3 years ago I got really bored with my list and names in general. I literally stopped going on name sites one day and left my list alone for about a year. When I came back and looked at my list, I fell in love with some of the names again, others I took off and knew they weren’t for me anymore. I think leaving those names alone for a bit will help greatly!
My case is a bit extreme and little different - I just wasn’t interested in any names at the time. However, I do think if you take that name off your list for a bit and try focusing the names you still adore or finding new names you do love will help. You’ll have a fresh perspective when you come back to it.
Also, I would try focusing on what you do like about your favorite names (the ones you still love) to find new ones. What is your style? Are there multiple styles you are attracted to? What about sounds? Meaning? Associations? Honoring?
This though. I’m exactly the same way with my combos I have. I’m very attached to some of them, but I have found myself moving some of my combos around and found myself falling back in love with them.
Thank you everyone for the advice! I decided to completely remove them from my master list and put them in my guilty pleasure/notlove/maybe list that I have saved on my computer. I’ve been playing with my list off and on for about a year now.
Also, I would try focusing on what you do like about your favorite names (the ones you still love) to find new ones. What is your style? Are there multiple styles you are attracted to? What about sounds? Meaning? Associations? Honoring?
I think this is solid point of view. I have been thinking of making a smaller list of the ones that I really can see being used. I have mostly a very modern classic style with naming. I think some of my names are not in that categories though, and one of them that I fell out of love was in that strange place that I find myself attracted too.
Well, realistically very few of us need even a Top 10, especially if all the names already have (family) middle names, so I usually just chuck the name even if I still think it’s beautiful, if it’s not for me anymore, what’s the use of keeping it around?!
I have tried pairing names with other middle names but usually that doesn’t do the trick either and in the end I want to love the first name, not the combo, the most.
You can always keep it on a long list and revisit it in a few months but for now, I’d just focus on other names.
I usually move the name from one of my current combos to the ‘shortlist’ just below them. Then it will either stay on the shortlist, re-appear in a combo (I re-work my combos from among my favourite names fairly often) or if the name truly loses its appeal, I’ll take it off all-together and give it a proper rest (it goes back into my mental long-list of names I like, don’t mind, loved at one time!).
I just get rid of them and on occasion, they creep back on. I don’t need to have long lists, they’re nice if I am brainstorming ideas but if I just have a top 100 and leave it at that it would stress me out so I try and keep everything minimal.