I’m glad I didn’t come off too rough. I know you very much like this name. Sometimes people ask what we think but they really only want to hear nice things, or maybe better arguments to sell their DH on it, lol. It sounds like you’re prepared to go ahead with it. I can’t be convinced, but I can’t argue with your confidence in the name despite what I’ve said, and that you are taking in perspective of a heap of approval for it. It also sounds like it won’t be too wacky in the neighborhood and school district.
It’s nice to know you have a strong opinion about this name, because I guess sometimes when we do share our honest opinions, even nicely, some people get shy of the names they like and pick something less controversial but sort of ambivalent. The child will live in reality and some of us try to represent the outside view, not just to approve or disapprove a name, but to imagine the reaction in our own communities - I think all of that information helps a parent prepare for the worst, and if they really love a name, I hope they don’t change their mind, and do consider the value of a negative opinion as just an opinion and prepare to confront that if necessary. What I don’t want is for people to choose a name they love and regret it because of all the problems they didn’t consider before their child was born, or unwittingly overlooked some kind of sound-alike that later is embarrassing to them. If you know ahead of time, you can choose to live with that potential, or you have time to find something else you love. If someone only wants to hear that they are smart and their choice is beautiful, they may be surprised when that name is a child in reality. I only hope that when I say negative things, I don’t come off as a jerk about it. I can be kind of blunt.
As far as self-esteem, eh, I don’t think I really approached that to the way you responded. Not everyone loves their name, so it wouldn’t necessarily be a self-esteem issue if she doesn’t love her name at a vulnerable and rebellious age, that it doesn’t fit her. I am of course projecting an imaginary me in that situation, but then again, I have different parents and lived in a different kind of area. [name]Primrose[/name] reminds me of my middle name and how I hated it, hated revealing it to anyone and mortified when it was discovered. That I don’t think has anything to do with self-esteem, but then I did grow to like it better. The experience shapes a person no matter what you try to offset.
Mostly, I know I’m making a lot out of nothing. Names aren’t, as much as I love them, the be all and end all of a person. We can stress each other out, sound the warning bells, try to gently steer you or someone else from some kind of disaster and construct just a resplendent combo, but I don’t think anyone’s name is a disaster, ever, or for that matter resplendent - it all averages out. It’s mostly just not what I would have done, they’ll be ok, even if you spell it Prrymrhoez. None of this is fatal!
I do think that [name]Primrose[/name] is very, very pretty, so I while my issue isn’t that I hate the name (because I don’t), it’s more of just worrying about the expectations of the name. If that’s not a concern for you, there’s nothing wrong with that, but I just thought it was something to consider.