What if I never find the "right" name?

I’m 38 weeks pregnant with our second child, first girl. We can’t decide on a name. It wasn’t this difficult with our son. I don’t know what to do. I’ve looked at thousands and thousands of names. My name is [name_f]Danica[/name_f], and I’ve only ever met one other [name_f]Danica[/name_f] in real life. I like that my name is unique. I’d love for our daughter to not have to share her name with someone else in her class. Any ideas?

What is your son’s name? Names that remind me of [name_f]Danica[/name_f] in popularity:


There’s no way to guarantee that your daughter won’t share her name with a classmate. This summer I was in a class with THREE Fallons, and that name was falling out of the top 1000 in the years they were born. In the meantime, my name is [name_f]Emily[/name_f] and I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve had a class with another [name_f]Emily[/name_f]. My advice would be to throw popularity concerns out the window. [name_u]Unique[/name_u] isn’t always a good thing, especially when it’s causing unnecessary stress.

I agree with southern maple! My son had a class with 3 or 4 [name_m]Julian[/name_m]'s in it-I had no idea [name_m]Julian[/name_m] was so popular! There were NO [name_u]Aidan[/name_u]'s/[name_u]Jayden[/name_u]/[name_u]Hayden[/name_u]'s in that class! You just never know so go with what you love!

You will find a name…bc eventually you just kind of have to call baby something;) I’m not sure your style, but there are tons of beautiful uncommon names to choose from!

Good luck!

@scandimom, I presume to think I have felt very similarly to you.
The thought ‘What if I never find that name?’ crossed my mind so often.
The difference in our situation is that I was trying to rename myself. I still suffer occasional but quite severe stress episodes associated with my former ‘unique’ name, after 9 years - last week was the latest after six months and 12 months before that.
So apologies, over to ‘your’ question. There are plenty of beautiful names, but which one will bring that special feeling?
A name that brought the comments - ‘I haven’t heard that name before’ and mostly- ‘Its lovely.’
A name that gets compliments and a name that is unique - well I had only every heard of 4 people -1 in my country ( a young boy), & 2 overseas. My experience showed me -I thought- ‘I need a name people like’-‘I need a name that makes me unique.’ I heard the neediness.
The uniqueness of names (and of situations where our names remained unusual) can change overnight virtually, as pointed out by previous Berries. The search can be all in vain if the name becomes super popular.
I am now due with baby #1(daughter) in [name_u]December[/name_u]. I wanted that special feeling for her too. About [name_u]July[/name_u] we found a name, its not unique - nor is it overused at this time.
But, I really really love the name as does DH (it is a joint choice)
Finding a name you love will be with you forever, I don’t think you have to feel you have to compromise.
Basics: don’t stress; believe you will find a name you really love & that will bring a sure, stronger feeling, & there’s quite a chance it will stay unusual but it won’t matter.
[name_f]Antigone[/name_f], [name_f]Andromache[/name_f], [name_f]Amoret[/name_f], [name_f]Melisende[/name_f] ([name_f]Queen[/name_f] of Jerusalem),
Dionysia, [name_u]Doone[/name_u] or just follow Nameberry and you might be swept away as was I, by the names Berries unearth.
My very best wishes & apologies for wordiness.

What is your son’s name? What is your general style? Any other considerations in addition to a unique or uncommon name?

Thank you everyone! We’re still considering a few names, and I keep hoping I’ll have a special feeling about one of the names once she’s born. I think part of the stress is that I [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] my son [name_u]Dane[/name_u]'s name. It has family significance, it’s not popular and I love the sound of it. I knew when I found it that’s what I wanted to name my son. I haven’t had that same experience this time. We are considering [name_f]Grace[/name_f] and [name_f]Isabel[/name_f] (both too popular for my taste but it’s what I like). A close third is [name_f]Noelle[/name_f].

I’ve had that feeling before and it is truly awful. I’ve been close to tears, thinking I’d name my baby something I didn’t really love because I was running out of time before my DD.

Like other people have said, unique isn’t always going to guarantee your kid is the only ‘…’ in their class. My name’s [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f] and I never had a class with a [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f] till high school (even even then we were the one ones in the whole school). But [name_f]Bronte[/name_f] for some reason was the name of every second student I came across haha and it’s not even that popular. My step daughter is currently in a class with four [name_f]Esther[/name_f]'s. Who knew [name_f]Esther[/name_f] was so popular!

I’d focus more on finding a name that you [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] and pushing the unique factor to the side for a bit.

Some less common names I can think of right now are:

[name_u]Billie[/name_u]-[name_f]Violet[/name_f] (fairly certain she’d probably be the only [name_u]Billie[/name_u]-[name_f]Violet[/name_f] in her class haha)
[name_f]Melody[/name_f] (I’ve never met another [name_f]Melody[/name_f] in all the years I’ve had my daughter)

Maybe something that’s very uncommon: for example, [name_f]Talisa[/name_f], [name_f]Lucine[/name_f], [name_f]Theone[/name_f], [name_f]Sonia[/name_f] (11 [name_f]Talisa[/name_f]'s born last year… slim chances.)

What is dad’s name? Obviously part of the reason you love the name [name_u]Dane[/name_u] is the similarity to your name and the beautiful family connection. So maybe you can use dads name somehow, and that is how it will become something meaningful and unique? It would make dad feel pretty honoured I would think too

Have you considered [name_f]Elsie[/name_f]? It was #386 in 2015 and is an adorable addition to [name_u]Dane[/name_u]. Other ideas for [name_u]Dane[/name_u]'s baby sister…


I tried to find names that are familiar yet but not super common. Let me know if you like any! Good luck!

I agree with other posters. There is no way to guarantee she will be the only girl with her name in her class, school, work, etc. In all honestly, if the only reason it’s keeping you away from [name_f]Grace[/name_f] and [name_f]Isabel[/name_f] it’s how many people will be in that class with the same name I would still use it. I would never not use a name that I truly love for another name that I don’t love that much just because it’s less popular. I think, in the end, it would be very easy to regret that choice. My advice would be, go with what you love.

But if you are truly concerned, you could use [name_f]Graziella[/name_f] instead [name_f]Grace[/name_f]. It’s elegant, classy, you can use [name_f]Grace[/name_f] as a nickname (or even [name_f]Ella[/name_f], if you prefer it), and it’s outside the top 1000. As for [name_f]Isabel[/name_f], it’s #149, I don’t find it that popular; but [name_f]Isobel[/name_f] it’s still outside the top 1000, if you like it.

Other suggestions:
[name_f]Catarina[/name_f] / [name_f]Caterina[/name_f]
[name_f]Tania[/name_f] / [name_f]Tatiana[/name_f]

P.S: do not stress yourself over this. You’ll find something you love :slight_smile:

My husband’s name is [name_u]Shane[/name_u] and I’m [name_f]Danica[/name_f], so [name_u]Dane[/name_u] is a compilation of our names. It was completely unintentional. We only realized the connection after I told him I liked the name [name_u]Dane[/name_u]. It is also significant because we both have Danish heritage. If we were having a boy we would name him [name_u]Finn[/name_u], for multiple significant reasons. But we’re having a girl and I can’t find anything that I like in our family tree or that ties in well. My DH likes [name_f]Greta[/name_f], [name_f]Gretchen[/name_f], [name_f]Kirsten[/name_f] and [name_f]Jill[/name_f]. I like [name_f]Grace[/name_f], [name_f]Isabel[/name_f], [name_f]Noelle[/name_f] and [name_f]Rosie[/name_f]. So we don’t agree :slight_smile:

Danica/Isabel/Grace/Noelle remind me of:
Isolde (Isolt, Yseult)
Roisin (ro-SHEEN)

Worry more about what you love. I [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] the name [name_u]Aidan[/name_u]. It has been around for centuries and started to trend at around the time my son was born. I have not once regretted using the name; it is still as wonderful sounding and looking to me as the day I first came to know it. In fact, I wanted to name my first child that but he had a last name that didn’t go well with it and so I held onto the name and waited. Choose a name that feels right for you and your child and you won’t regret how popular it becomes. I knew of, and didn’t even really know, two Ethans when I named my oldest son. It wasn’t one of my favorite names but it was his name and it belongs on him. I chose it entirely myself and still went with it! It was the right name and even that name is super popular (though I still don’t know many.) Whatever you choose, you should be able to look at your child and tell them you picked that name for them. [name_m]Don[/name_m]'t worry about what everyone else is, or isn’t, doing.

What about Lalena - it’a pronounced La Lainya

I went to school with a girl named this and I always thought it was so pretty, different but still classy.

I think it sounds perfect with [name_u]Shane[/name_u], [name_f]Danica[/name_f], [name_u]Dean[/name_u] and Lalena

When you list the names you and your husband like, I think of [name_f]Freya[/name_f]. More exotic like his names, but softer and more feminine like your picks :slight_smile: and it is similar to [name_u]Finn[/name_u]!

Good luck! You will find the right name in the end no matter what

Here are some names to consider:
Good luck with your decision.

If you’re having a hard time finding “the name” I would just make a list of potential names and then wait until she is born. Once you see her what her name should be should become more clear. Good luck!