A fluffy pet - I guess it depends on the pet! I got a cat when I was six, and a dog when I was 9, but other animals way before then. It also depends if there are pre existing children in the family and they’re sort of “family pets“ in a way.
Would you allow your child to change their name? If they’re 16 and they have repeatedly discussed their discomfort with their birth name to you, and it’s not just a phase. Also if the change was unrelated to gender identity.
Yes, of course! I’m gonna choose my children’s names with love and care, but if they feel uncomfortable with it, my child’s happiness comes before what I want them to be called–I’m not the one who has to live with the name.
Would you allow your child to stay up to midnight on [name_u]New[/name_u] Years? At what age?
Yes!! I think all of the fun on [name_u]New[/name_u] Years is watching the countdown, and I generally don’t see a problem with allowing my child stay up until midnight once a year. I believe that children can make their own bed times and are able to tell when they are truly tired (to a certain extent), so I most likely wouldn’t even give them a bed time at a certain age. Obviously this doesn’t mean I’d let my 3 year old decide every night that they’re going to stay up until 11pm and wake up at 6 am, my young children will have times that they will need to be in bed, but once they get to 7/8 and they can confidently say “Oh, I have to get up at 7:00 am to get ready for school,” and realize what amounts of sleep they need to be fully charged during the day, then they can!
Anyway, I think I’d let my kids stay up whenever they show an interest in it! As I’ve said before it’s really only one night a year, and I don’t think it would affect them that much. However, if my child needed to be on a routine, I would be less likely to let them.
With this being said, I believe that kids need to learn natural consequences, for example, if they are determined to stay up until midnight, I’ll kindly let them know that they may wake up feeling tired and it could make them have a hard day the next day! And who knows, maybe they will be really grumpy the next day and in a year they’ll decide that they don’t like staying up until midnight on [name_u]New[/name_u] Years [name_f]Eve[/name_f]!
So yes, I would let my child stay up on [name_u]New[/name_u] Years!
Would you let your child make food in the kitchen? If so, at what age?
I’m not sure about completely unsupervised, I think it would depend on the type of food and how their cooking skills are going. Helping themselves to cereal or toast could be quite young, even 5 or 6? But supervised, my 1 and 4 year old LOVE buttering and putting spreads on toast, pushing down the button for the toaster, pushing the buttons for the coffee machine, even stirring sugar into hot coffee (to be clear they’re not the ones drinking the coffee!), helping bake cookies and scones etc… the 4 yr old will even help stir and fry the mince for a spag bol, and I’ve taught the 1 yr old how to turn on the oven for cookies (he was turning on the oven anyway copying us and trying to be a “big kid”, so I figured maybe letting him ACTUALLY help would reduce that urge).
I think teaching them to be as independent and capable as possible is what parenting is all about.
Would you let your child play computer or play station games? At what age (or what games?)
Yes, sure! I think at the age of seven-nine is fine, depending on maturity. Nothing too harsh, PG7 controlled games like Minecraft (I really like Minecraft myself!) and I would love to play with them too. I would fix on something like a 2 hour limit, although in some rain days where the child gets really bored in weekends or in special days as a prize for something I could allow more time, but with break times.
The reasonings:
I think too young children should not really play video games because it hurts their eyes (I was one of those kids who got tablets and stuff since very young and I started wearing glasses since the age of five…)
Again, playing for too long time hurts your sight and you really should not get too addicted to video games because it hurts eyes and other stuff of health
But I would not forbid them at all and I think two hours are not that few as a time for young children, so it is fine. I am young myself too so I am not sure on if I am right or not on this.
Go to school alone at middle school? Or the last years of elementary school.
It depends on how far it is from home but I think so, yes. Especially when they go to middle school I don’t want them to be embarrassed if they are the only ones not allowed to go alone. Of course it also depends on how mature the child is and if it knows how to act on certain situations (not get in car with strangers etc.)
Let the kid go alone on a bus/train for a longer distance (2-5 hours) for example to visit the grandparents? If yes at which age?
Hmm…I’d let them go on the train at 17. Probably wouldn’t allow them on the bus at all, feels riskier lol.
Would you let them go on a cruise with friends out of the country?
It depends on the destination, how long, and potentially spending how much (I do think I’d give them some money for it, but if it’s more then they have to save up to cover the cost themselves). Oh, last but not least, do I know their friends? If I’ve met them at least a couple of times and all seem responsible enough to me, yes. At 16-17 the youngest.
Go on a trip with their bf/gf (or lets friends group but you know their bf/gf is also there)?
if i trusted and knew their bf/gf probably a short trip but only if they were older than maybe 15?
have their phone in their room at night?
No. I think even adults shouldn’t have their phone in the room at night (not that we don’t totally do, but I’d like to keep them out at night).
Have sleepovers, more importantly at what age?
Sure! I grew up with rather strict parents myself so I know the frustration of not being allowed to do much. I think I’d let them have a sleepover from age 6-7. It also depends if I know the parents of the friend and if I trust them.
Stay outside (riding bikes, Go on a walk, meet friends) later than 9-10pm? At which age?
i wouldnt let them do this till they were around 16 in the winter because its darker and like 14 in the summer I wouldn’t be comfortable with that.
Sleepover at a boys house (the relationship with the boy is platonic)
Of course yes for sons. And when girls are young, sure! But not when they’re older (probably once they hit puberty) just for accountability reasons.
wear clothes that you don’t deem modest, even if they spent their own money on it?
I would be OK with it for a specific event–not the staples of a wardrobe–provided it met these critera:
What’s the youngest you’d let your child… operate a sewing machine?
when i was around 7 i had this toy sewing machine that I loved that actually worked but its was pretty harmless so for the toy as long as I knew my kid wouldn’t mess with it and I was supervising i’d say 8 but for an actual sewing machine i’d say like 13 with supervision and depending on responsibility like 14 without supervision
The youngest you would leave your child in the kitchen alone to cook a meal fully?
To be honest? I d’say 13-14. Maybe 12? I am sorry, I am a little paranoid myself, I know most people might allow them to do even younger.
Go a trip on their own with their friends in summer? Maybe they will just stay at their friend’s family’s holiday house, or they might go their own somewhere.
Yes, at 15/16 i would but I would have had to really know my child’s friend and trust them and their parents and it depends where they were going, I would probably prefer it if their friends parents went with them or I went with them
[name_m]Leave[/name_m] them home alone for an hour or more?
Depending on the child, I’d say between 8 and 12 (more if you have a rowdy kid or siblings that might fight), with mine, since she’s very reasonable and doesn’t put herself in danger, I think maybe 8 years old with a phone to contact me if I leave more than 20 min.
Embrace a different religion than you if they choose to?
(I guess it’s more of a would you accept it/support it, than allow it)
Of course! That would be fine, I would definitely help them as well, like if they were Buddhist I would drive them to a temple, buy vegetarian food etc etc
listen to music with expletives in it?
Yes.
Allow them to date someone before the age of 15?