[name_m]Hi[/name_m]! [name_m]Just[/name_m] thinking about the rules and regulations of naming. Would you use a name that belonged to someone you knew, but not as an honor?
I have a cousin named [name_f]Polly[/name_f], and I LOVE that name, and we’re pretty close, but not really naming-your-kid-after-them close. Another example, I’ve loved the name [name_f]Josephine[/name_f] nn [name_u]Jo[/name_u] forEVER, but I have a friend named Joe…
I really think it’s a case-by-case basis thing! For [name_f]Josephine[/name_f] ‘Jo’ I think it’s absolutely fine. [name_f]Josephine[/name_f] is a trendy name, people would just think you named her [name_f]Josephine[/name_f] because you liked it, and [name_u]Jo[/name_u] came as a nickname naturally. I doubt that anyone would think it had anything to do with your friend, [name_u]Joe[/name_u]!
[name_f]Polly[/name_f] is a bit different, because it’s a much more unexpected choice and direct reference… I think it’d be fine if you told your cousin about it (as in, “Hey, I really like the name [name_f]Polly[/name_f] for a kid, would it be weird for you if I used it?”) as long as you don’t mind a few others in your family assuming it was an honour.
I personally wouldn’t use names that are obviously related to relatives’ names, but that’s my only limit. [name_f]My[/name_f] favourite name for a long time was [name_m]Harvey[/name_m], and my childhood best friend is [name_u]Harry[/name_u] - I would’ve felt a little awkward about it, but been fine using it as long as I explained to him first that it was only a coincidence!
Hmm, it is a tricky one - I probably wouldn’t do it if I was close enough to the person that it could be considered an honour - and I’d also take into account if it was going to be exactly the same name or not.
So - I love the name [name_u]Dana[/name_u], but I have a good friend with that name and people would assume it was a nod to her. On the other hand, I have a cousin called [name_u]Robin[/name_u], but we’ve met a handful of times, and they’ve never really been in my life - I’d consider it, because I don’t think anyone would assume it was after said cousin.
In terms of ‘sameness’, I think [name_f]Tallulah[/name_f] ‘Lula’ would be fine, and not considered an honour to my cousin [name_f]Lucy[/name_f], but [name_m]Reuben[/name_m] ‘Rue’ feels like a no, because it’s so close to my cousin [name_u]Ruby[/name_u]?
Back to you. [name_f]Polly[/name_f] would be too much for me - you’re close enough and family enough that I feel like it might be a bit weird / considered an honour.
In terms of [name_f]Josephine[/name_f] vs [name_u]Joe[/name_u] - I think you could get away with it. [name_f]Josephine[/name_f] feels like a separate choice, and has other associations??
[name_f]My[/name_f] brain makes associations and connections too strongly to use any names I think of someone else with, unless it’s directly an honour name. It’s made my naming process really difficult! But once I associate the name with someone or something, it’s off the table. Ughhh.
I definitely agree with the other opinions, that [name_f]Polly[/name_f] is too close and people would assume. Though, [name_f]Appoline[/name_f] nn [name_f]Polly[/name_f] I wouldn’t assume as much.
Jo/Josephine I would never think was after a make [name_u]Joe[/name_u] unless he’s like your best friend or something
We have such a large family that this happens all the time. Our etiquette is just simply to inform them that we will be using their name, that way if the peraon does have a problem they have the opportunity to voice their concern.