Are nicknames necessary?

I’ve noticed that a lot of berries like to pick a name based on the nickname potential or work backwards from a nickname they like to the full name.
I’m the complete opposite. I like names such as [name]Hermione[/name],[name]Torin[/name],[name]Aurelia[/name], [name]Jasper[/name] and have no intentions of shortening them.
Nothing wrong with nicknames at all,I just wondered what everyone thinks on the topic. Might even make me change my mind!

I don’t mind nicknames, but I’m not going to pick a name just because there is no nickname potential. I love [name]Luna[/name] as [name]Luna[/name], I dislike [name]LuLu[/name] and all that other stuff. [name]Luna[/name] is short enough as it is. With longer names like [name]Catherine[/name], then maybe I can see it necessary for a nn since it’s a such a long name.

nn are cute, but not necessary. I grew up with no solid nickname. I have occasionally been called D or [name]Di[/name] instead of [name]Diana[/name], but it’s very limited. I only have one friend who calls me [name]Di[/name] and a couple call me D when they’re in a hurry, but it’s not a common thing. I’m mainly [name]Diana[/name]. My sister, [name]Melissa[/name], was always [name]Melissa[/name] until high school and some friends thought it would be cool to call her [name]Mel[/name], so she got that nn later in life.

I am a nickname lover! I think the biggest reason I like names with nicknames is that I get to use more names! For example, I love the name [name]Elisabeth[/name]. If I could, I would name a future daughter [name]Elisabeth[/name] and use multiple nicknames. Maybe when she’s an infant I’d call her [name]Betsy[/name], [name]Betsy[/name] [name]Baby[/name], [name]Betsy[/name] Boo, etc. Maybe as a toddler she would shorten her own name to Lissy because it’s easier to say. Then in school, maybe the kids start calling her [name]Beth[/name]/Bethie. I like the flexibility of a name with multiple nicknames. :slight_smile:

Pretty much any name here will get a nickname, (Australia - infatuated with the nickname) I just try to make sure there’s a chance it won’t be hideous.

I grew up with an unusual, semi-hard to say name, and my parents were (not Australian! American!) able to stomp out nicknames pretty hard - and it was difficult for me to deal with because I hated hearing “wrong” versions of my name all the time, would have rather had a nick. I came up with a plausible nickname when I was 16 and people latched onto it because its easier to say/spell.

As a kid all my dolls had names like [name]Jenny[/name], [name]Susie[/name] - I had a doll named [name]Susie[/name] and a doll named [name]Suzy[/name] - and [name]Beth[/name]. With long names that MAGICALLY BECAME SHORT NAMES EVERYONE CAN [name]SAY[/name]. Bitter much? lol, I was an odd kid.

I like the flexibility/options nicknames offer. I have to like the full name though. And I’ll use an odd/unusual name if it has a simple nickname. [name]Emerald[/name]? [name]Emmy[/name]. [name]Lysander[/name]? [name]Sander[/name].

If I really, really love a nicknamey name, and love a longer form of it, I’d use the long form. If I love a long name and dislike the nickname options, I’d just leave it as-is and go with the long form and tell people not to shorten it.
My name is [name]Lucia[/name] but I go by [name]Lucy[/name] 95% of the time. I love having the option of using either of them.
[name]Edmund[/name] has been my #1 boy name for the past 17 years (since I was 8) and I’ve never had any intention of shortening it.
There was a period in time where I loved the names [name]Molly[/name], [name]Sadie[/name] & [name]Edie[/name], and I found [name]Rosemary[/name], [name]Isadora[/name] and [name]Evadne[/name] so I put those on my list with nicknames.
I have [name]Tess[/name] & [name]Silke[/name] on my list with no intention of using [name]Theresa[/name] nor [name]Cecilia[/name].

I love nicknames, however, I don’t think they are necessary.

There are tons of names I love that really have no natural nicknames: [name]Gage[/name], [name]Anna[/name], [name]Ivy[/name], [name]Reid[/name], [name]Noah[/name], [name]Hale[/name], [name]Holly[/name], [name]Heidi[/name], [name]Jude[/name], [name]Joy[/name], [name]Isaac[/name], [name]Eve[/name], [name]Leo[/name], [name]Luke[/name], [name]Alice[/name], [name]Jane[/name], [name]Hanna[/name], [name]Piper[/name], [name]Norah[/name], [name]Levi[/name], [name]Nash[/name], [name]Dawn[/name]. I could go on and on.

Though, as you can see these are mostly short names. I’m not fond of “forbidding” nicknames as some people try to do. If a name is 3 or 4 syllables or 8 letters long it’s inevitable that either the kid or others will shorten it, so it’s important to know and like at least some of the nicknames.

I honestly think it’s a little ridiculous to go through life scolding every person who doesn’t want to call your kid [name]Persephone[/name]. I even think it’s a little silly to do it yourself. I mean, you obviously have a right to not be called Seph if you don’t want to be, but that’s why I like longer names that have multiple options.

When they’re a squirming red skinbag you really have no clue what kind of person your child will become so I think a longer name with a lot of nicknames is a really kind way to allow your child some freedom and the ability to safely and legitimately experiment with selves as a teen/young adult.

I don’t know but I don’t understand the fear some berries have of someone calling their child a nn they don’t like, for ex: [name]Frances[/name] nn [name]Frank[/name], just tell people you don’t call them that. I’ve never seen people insist on calling someone a name when asked not to, dh uses the full form of his name has never had someone try to shorten it and if they did he would correct it and move on. I just dont think this is a problem that would plague a child for life and be a good reason to reject a name you love.

I also don’t get some nn’s that have nothing to do with the name or are so far removed that if someone explained why their [name]Matilda[/name] was called [name]Molly[/name] or something similar I would think it was bizarre.

I have. I used to get it all the time as a kid. I still hate [name]Jordy[/name] and [name]Danna[/name], yet people would pick one and stick to it no matter how many times I said “that’s not my name” - and I have a friend from when I was 8 who to this day (and it is 20 years latter), [name]WILL[/name] call me [name]Danna[/name]. It’s now almost cute - from him. Only from him. But he wasn’t the only person to do it.

I picked another nickname in defense, because people will use it, but my 3 syllable first name? Nope. At least I like [name]Josie[/name] well enough.

My brother has a 4 syllable first - it was give them what he found digestible in nicknames, or another would be assigned.

I don’t have to like all the nicknames a name might have, but I have to like at least some of them. [name]Elizabeth[/name]? I like [name]Libby[/name] and [name]Betty[/name], it can stay. [name]Catherine[/name]? I dislike [name]Cathy[/name], but I like [name]Cat[/name], it can stay. [name]Gabriel[/name]? Gaahhh… I really like [name]Gabriel[/name], but I don’t believe I can keep people from calling him [name]Gabe[/name]. I’m bumping it to MN only.

I guess I’m guilty of doing this. I adore the nn [name]Effie[/name], but [name]Elisabeth[/name] isn’t to my taste. When I found [name]Seraphina[/name], I liked it. But what really appealed to me was that I could use [name]Seraphina[/name], nn [name]Effie[/name].

On the other hand, there are a few nicknames I really hate that are putting me off using a few of my favourites. My top 3 for girls are [name]Alice[/name], [name]Rose[/name], and [name]Lucy[/name]. I’m okay with [name]Rose[/name] getting [name]Rosie[/name] from time to time. I’m okay with [name]Lucy[/name] getting [name]Lulu[/name]. [name]Alice[/name] was our #1 but now she’s been bumped down to #3 cause my OH suggested we could all her [name]Allie[/name] for short, which I hate!

I think nicknames can make or break a name for many people.

@stripedsocks that’s so strange to me. I remember someone on a name site (maybe here, I can’t remember) met a little girl with a cool name, lets say Mazarine since I don’t remember it exactly, they approached the little girl and called her Mazzie to which the little girl said “that’s not my name”. This person was disappointed that the kid didn’t go by the nn they thought they should. I remember thinking how unbelievably rude it was to call a kid, especially one you just met, a nn that you think they should go by when they’ve been introduced to you as something different.

I’ve only had one person in my life continue to nn me and they were over 70, I don’t think they could remember my name and my Mother never corrected them so I just let it go. If it had been anyone else I know she would have told them to cut it out and that it wasn’t funny or polite, I would do the same for my future kids if I had to.

I get a lot of people shorten my name to [name]Soph[/name], even though I always introduce myself as [name]Sophie[/name]. It doesn’t really bother me at all.

I agree with a previous poster about not having to like all the potential nicknames as long as you like a few, especially with the long, what I call ‘frilly’ names. [name]Francesca[/name] might be a mouthful for small children, but if your sister’s kids know they can call your daughter Chesca when they’re playing with her, you know you’re going to get her being called Chesca, which is your preference, rather than [name]Frankie[/name] which you find too boyish. If you establish the nickname young, you’re not going to end up with one you hate by the time they reach school age and their peers nickname them for them.

@txbelle, yeah, I don’t get why people do it, but they do. Seems even worse for boys. I’ve seen a number of guys say directly even as grown men “hi my name is [full name]…” and get back a chipper “[name]Hi[/name] [nickname]!” Like, you just met the guy.

Then there are the people who nickname nicknames. My husband introduces himself as [name]Ben[/name]. He REALLY doesn’t like “[name]Benno[/name].”

Not to pick on you but this made me laugh - I think almost all the American Isaacs I know are Ikes or Izzys, and all the Aussie Isaacs are [name]Zac[/name]/[name]Zack[/name]/Zachs. In fact the only issue with it on our list is I my husband will want to call an [name]Isaac[/name], [name]Zac[/name], and I find that slightly blood-curdling, lol.

No, nicknames are not necessary. Personally I think the nickname obsession among members of this website has crossed the line into ridiculous territory. Discarding a name you love because it doesn’t have a cute nickname option? Ridiculous. Giving your child a full name that you never intend to use just so you can call them a certain nickname? Ridiculous. Struggling to find a nickname for a one or two syllable name? Ridiculous.

[name]One[/name] recent example I’ve seen on the boards is [name]Emerson[/name]. The poster wanted to find a nickname for [name]Emerson[/name] that wasn’t [name]Emmy[/name] (she was considering it for a boy). Why does [name]Emerson[/name] need a nickname? I posed this question and another poster called three syllable names “unwieldy.” What?? My name is [name]Emily[/name], a three syllable name, and I have never thought of my name as “unwieldy.” What silliness.

@stripedsocks, it’s really interesting to get your personal perspective on this issue I never thought of it that way, that a familiar nickname could make a difficult, exotic, or hard-to-pronounce name more approachable and friendlier for its bearer. To go back to the original issue, I’ve said here at times that it bothers me that someone will start with a distinctive name like [name]Emerald[/name] and automatically shorten it to something so much more ordinary like [name]Emmy[/name]. It feels like they make a bold choice but then immediately back off from it, like, I don’t know, covering up a colorful designer blouse with a plain navy blue blazer.

So looking at this nickname issue in terms of advising parents, I feel: Have the courage of your convictions! Choose a name you’re not afraid to use in its full form! But from the child’s perspective, you made me see, @stripedsocks, how choosing an elaborate name that comes with a built-in familiar nickname can give you the best of both worlds.

I’m not opposed to nicknames, but I don’t think a given name needs one either. I certainly don’t limit my options based on nickname potential. Middle names give children options too, if they want to go by something else when they’re older.

When we were pregnant with our first, my husband insisted on picking a name that couldn’t be easily shortened. His name is [name]Matthew[/name], and he has said multiple times that now as an adult, he wishes his parents would have actually called him [name]Matthew[/name].

Neither of our boys have names with obvious nicknames, and both go by their full name. Personally, if someone has a name with obvious nicknames, or I hear them being called something different, I ask them (or the child’s parents) out of respect, what they prefer to be called. I had a coworker once named [name]Debra[/name] that went by [name]Deb[/name] or [name]Debra[/name], but she requested not to be called [name]Debbie[/name]. Some people do get aggravated when they’re called a name they don’t like, and I don’t want to be the offender! :wink:

I can’t imagine naming a child something without nn potential. My (legal) name is [name]Sophia[/name], and my parents always intended to call me [name]Sophie[/name], which is what I go by. It turned out that I HATE (loathe, despise, abhor) the name [name]Sophia[/name], and am grateful to have a name option that I do love! If I gave one of my children a name like [name]Jack[/name] or [name]Paige[/name], I would feel awful if they didn’t love that name as much as I did and then had no other choice on what to go by. That’s why a name like [name]Margaret[/name] is amazing to me - I have a dear friend who does just go by [name]Margaret[/name], but if she wanted, she could go by [name]Peg[/name]/[name]Peggy[/name], [name]Meg[/name], [name]Maggie[/name], [name]Daisy[/name], [name]Greta[/name], or [name]Marge[/name]! I call her [name]Peg[/name], MarMar, and [name]Margie[/name], and if she ever decided she didn’t feel like a [name]Margaret[/name], she would have options!

I believe nicknames ARE necessary, because I never want a child of mine to feel like they’re named incorrectly. Identity crises happen too often to kids, without their names being another albatross around their neck!

My name is [name]Sara[/name], and I never had a real nn. My aunt called me Sarabelle, which I loved but no one else called me that. [name]Sadie[/name] always seemed like a huge stretch to me. My BFF sometimes called me [name]Essa[/name], at my request, but I knew it was kind of silly. Anyway, I love [name]Sara[/name] and always have, so I didn’t feel the need for a real nn. My DH is [name]Andrew[/name] and his mom frequently corrected ppl who called him [name]Andy[/name], and she won. He is def [name]Andrew[/name], not [name]Andy[/name]. No one calls him that. Our son is [name]Seth[/name], a name we both loved, and it also appealed bc like [name]Sara[/name], [name]IMO[/name], there are no real nns for [name]Seth[/name]. Our DD…now her name was tricky, and she’s only 5 mos so we will see what happens. I have always loved the name [name]Madeline[/name], but we almost didn’t use it bc I didnt want the nn [name]Maddy[/name]. However, we decided to go with it. So far, the first thing ppl have asked me, including DH’s parents, is “[name]Will[/name] you call her [name]Maddy[/name]?” I answer that no, we will call her by her full name, [name]Madeline[/name]. People seem fine with this, but you can tell, they are slightly disappointed, or give you a slightly weird look. I have no idea why they do this, but I did anticipate it at least, so I’m not surprised or anything. [name]Even[/name] with a name like [name]Elizabeth[/name], which I love, and I love so many of the nns, I still don’t think I could bring myself to shorten such a beautiful name, except for occasionally.

They’re not always necessary and I like plenty of names that have no traditional nicknames (or none apart from generic nicknames that could work for many names). Plus, I usually prefer the full forms. Sometimes I love a full name but find the nickname unappealing - [name]Archie[/name], [name]Randy[/name], [name]Reggie[/name], etc.

However, they add versatility to a name and give people who don’t like their full names options. An [name]Elizabeth[/name] [name]Millicent[/name] [name]Doe[/name] who hated her name(s) would have an easier time coming up with suitable alternatives throughout her life than a [name]Ceres[/name] [name]Demeter[/name] [name]Doe[/name] (provided neither wants to legally change her name). Of course, the more generic names like Cece, [name]Bebe[/name], [name]Dede[/name] and [name]Kiki[/name] can often work in situations like this.

And some names with few or no traditional nicknames lend themselves to nickname creation more than others. That’s why I don’t like certain short names as full names - for instance, [name]Zoe[/name] ([name]Zo[/name] isn’t much of a nickname, and what else is there? [name]Zizi[/name]?).

I know what you mean. I intend to call my children what I name them, if I wanted to call them by a short name I’d name them that. But, my favorite names for each gender have nicknames that I do like. I couldn’t have a favorite name that had a nickname I didn’t like. Like, my favorite girl name is [name]Francesca[/name], and I love the nickname [name]Fran[/name]/[name]Franny[/name]. [name]Even[/name] though I wouldn’t call her that most of the time, having the option is best for the child if they decide they don’t like their name and there’s always going to be those people who insist on giving them a nickname. I kind of rambled here, sorry!

I’m not big into nicknames - I love having a name that can’t be shortened or nicknamed. Some of the names on my list have nicknames that I love, or at least could tolerate. Others, I dread being nicknamed, and might not even use them for that reason (example: I adore [name]Edwin[/name], but DESPISE “[name]Ed[/name]” - and it’s fairly unavoidable that someone would call him “[name]Ed[/name]”…or…"[name]Eddie[/name]"…shudder…). I also like [name]Adelaide[/name], but dislike [name]Addy[/name], and [name]Josephine[/name], but HATE “[name]Josie[/name]”.

However, I find all of [name]Elizabeth[/name]'s nicknames charming (except [name]Liz[/name]/[name]Lizzy[/name]), and if I named a future son [name]Callum[/name], I might just call him [name]Cal[/name]! And then there’s [name]Maisie[/name] and [name]Maggie[/name] - two nicknames I find irresistible, but cannot for the life of me find a long-form I love enough to use.