Baby name regret 2 years later :( Anyone else?

Having baby name regret 2 years later and feel so crappy about it. I have never truly loved youngest child’s name and it feels weird/awkward/too late to change it, but I can’t stop thinking about it. I have another daughter but always loved her name and never thought of changing it because it felt right. I only agreed to my second born’s name because my husband didn’t like most of the names I threw out there, but liked this one. But every time someone says her name it feels “wrong” and I cringe. At first I thought it was just postpartum hormones, and I would adjust, but it’s been 2 years and a month and I still can’t get over it. I have tried to let go of these feelings but they always come back. And no, I won’t mention the name. I will say that while it’s an uncommon name, I receive complements on it pretty often. I also have people say “Oh that’s an interesting name” meaning they don’t really like it because it’s too unusual for their taste. The fact that it her name is uncommon and prone to mispronunciation doesn’t help the whole situation. I feel like she will have issues with this her whole life, always having to spell out her name and correct people on the pronunciation. I have tried calling her by a different name sometimes (her middle name) and she actually responds to it, so I’m wondering if maybe it isn’t too late to switch around her first and middle name and that she will adjust? Curious if anyone out there has changed their child’s name so late in the game? Whenever I call her by her middle name, which I love, it feels strange because I’m used to calling her by the other, so I’d love to hear from parents who have changed their child’s name. How long did it take before everyone was used to the new name and it felt normal? Not 100% sure I’m going to change it yet, but I don’t want this to haunt me forever!! By the way, my husband said he is on board to change it since it bugs me so much! All I know is I have to make a decision quick since she’s getting older and more aware by the day!

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Instead of switching it around permanently how about just simply using her middle name from now on as her every day name & when it comes to schools/doctors write her middle name down in the ‘goes by/known as’ section. [name_m]Plenty[/name_m] of people do this so it wouldn’t be odd for you to make the sudden switch & also gives her the option to go back to using her first name in the future if she decides that she prefers that name herself.

Good luck deciding what to do :blush:

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If he is okey with it, then definitely go for it!! :blush: Two years is not that late. I’d either switch it around or put the middle as first and get a different middle. I wouldn’t get a completely different new name, but ya, don’t hesitate. :blush:

Switch them! [name_m]Or[/name_m] have her go by her middle. two years is long enough to decide you don’t like a name. It would be hard to start over with a brand new name, so I think going by her middle is the perfect solution here.

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I would say it is probably too late to formally change her name, but her starting to go by her middle doesn’t seem weird to me, especially if it is more of a gradual transition!

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There is some advice out there on changing a baby’s name after around 6 months when their name is part of their self-identity and associated with how they see themselves in the world/ their self-esteem. You can look it up but extrapolating, I wouldn’t change it in a very sudden way. I would call her a combination of her current first name, her middle name, and the two names together/ hyphenated, alternating for a good while (maybe 6-12 months) while you slowly use her middle name more. Then I agree with the above, you could change it officially but it might be enough just to tell her preschool/primary school that she goes by X (middle name) and mark her belongings with that name/ teach her that name to write. Nothing sudden or confusing/potentially traumatising in ways you might not know/expect! Slowly-slowly. :slight_smile:

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Personally, I wouldn’t change her name at this point. Both of my kids definitely knew and identified with their names by that age. However, like others are saying, it’s not too late for your child’s middle name or a nickname to take over! If you start using it all the time, it’s sure to catch on. Good luck! I hope you find a solution, because I know it would be so tough to feel that way about your child’s name for so long.

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Hey, just wanted to see if you have an update? What did you decide to do, where you are with this now?

I’m in a very similar situation. [name_f]My[/name_f] baby is 13 months and right after her first birthday I broke down to my husband and admitted to him that I really don’t like her name. I’ve had doubts about her name since early on but I always reasoned them away. They’ve just kept coming back. Im pretty sure we are going to change her name. We’ve been calling her a different name. But like you said, even tho I don’t like her old name, it feels weird to call her something else.

[name_f]My[/name_f] youngest is 11mo. He has been responding to his name since 6mo. Two years seems a bit way too lo ng to try and change their identity now. When I had a child whose name I questioned initially I helped fall in love with his name by using a nickname. He became his nickname and he became his full name.

[name_m]Plenty[/name_m] of people go by their middles or by a nickname. These options are better for you in my opinion. Having a consistent sense of identity at that crucial developmental age is super important! I wouldn’t shake their identity at that age.

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