Baby Name Regret - help

[name_m]Hi[/name_m]! [name_m]Just[/name_m] after some advice… I am having regret by over my baby’s name, she is 12 weeks old now and it just won’t pass. I thought it might but I still can’t say her name and don’t really like it when others do. It’s the worst feeling. Does anyone have any experience in this happening? What can I do? I feel bit ashamed and anxious about changing it. Thinking about what other will think…

Throughout the pregnancy I came across the name @yla and it really is a beautiful name and pretty meaning, related to the moon and light which I love, so I don’t know why I can’t just accept it and start moving on. [name_f]My[/name_f] husband and I have such different tastes, this one wasn’t a hard no so it’s the one that we just ended up going with although he wasn’t that into it initially. I keep thinking I’d like a longer or more traditional name would be better for her. I also want a name that can transition from baby to adult. With cute nickname ideas. [name_f]Sister[/name_f] is Charlott3 Am3lie. And she has been using bubs name a bit, I don’t want to upset her (7yo). Wish there was a way she could still use it. I don’t know if their names ‘go’ together or it’s not got much history…?

Other names I was interested in were:
3velina (Evs nn, [name_f]Evi[/name_f], like it bit more than Ev3lyn, hubby not so keen)
Am3lia (hubby not so keen, don’t like Milli4 nn)
Alys3 (close to a friends name)
@va (still short but I think goes well with other daughter)
Lil1ana (hubby thinks too Italian? we aren’t Italian)

He liked:
Wi11ow (I’m not into)
Audr3y (which I also love but can’t use cos of family friend)

[name_m]Just[/name_m] want to make everyone happy and move on…:confused: sorry for long post.
Any advice or help figuring this out would be amazing. TIA

I’m so sorry this is causing you stress!

Have you been using any nicknames yet? Sometimes the right nickname can help click things into place. I know you mentioned Bub in your post, in the southern US bubba is a cutesy little brother name, maybe you can get something from that?

Some other nicknames related to her name:
[name_f]Lala[/name_f]
[name_m]Ales[/name_m]
[name_f]Lola[/name_f]
Yale/Yael (not super nickname-y but you could possibly make it work!)
[name_f]Moon[/name_f]
[name_f]Starlight[/name_f]
[name_f]Starry[/name_f]
Tree (I knew someone with this nickname and honestly it works soooo much better than I would’ve expected

Also, have you tried calling her by her middle name or nicknames related to it?

One thing that might help is asking her big sister things she loves about the baby’s name, it could give you new reasons to fall in love with it. For what it’s worth I think it’s a gorgeous name and agree that the meanings are quite lovely.

Best of luck!

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Don’t worry about what others think! It’ll effect you much more than anyone else. People will quickly forget.
I think you should change it, if you can agree on a new name.
I really like [name_f]Ava[/name_f] with [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f] and it sounded like you both like it?

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Why don’t you try out a few different names on her, just for yourself, and if you find that any of them feel more natural you can bring it up with your partner.
I do think sometimes names don’t immediately suit a child but that they will eventually grow into them and wear them well, so if you don’t end up being convinced by another name or your partner does not want to change the name, I think your child will end up being a wonderful @yla.
That being said, [name_f]Ava[/name_f] does feel very close to her current name, so I think that would be an easy change for everyone to get used to.
Another option might be [name_f]Layla[/name_f], which feels a little more established and also fits Char1otte well.

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I vote change it, and soon. [name_f]Sister[/name_f] will relearn. Better now to live without regrets. This will be a funny story someday. I had friends who simply shared, “Funny story, changed baby names. Re-introducing….”

You never said middle name. Switching those is easy and no legal change needed. Other Ideas: [name_f]Kayla[/name_f], [name_f]Lola[/name_f], [name_f]Mia[/name_f], [name_f]Gemma[/name_f], [name_f]Eva[/name_f], [name_f]Fiona[/name_f], [name_u]Ruby[/name_u], [name_f]Alexa[/name_f] …all good with [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f].

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[name_m]Hi[/name_m] there! I am so sorry you are feeling this regret. That is a lot to feel & process after welcoming a new little one. Yet, like others have mentioned, name regret can absolutely be relieved by choosing a name you do feel suits your daughter and that you love to hear and say to her.
I am curious, what are your husband’s thoughts on changing her name? Have you had a chance to discuss your regret with him openly? If not, I would encourage you to start there so that the two of you feel you’re on the same page in regards to choosing a new name for her.
When reading through your list, it seems like [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] might be the only one you & your husband both love. Yet, you mentioned it cannot be used due to family friend. I would encourage you to reconsider if the name you both love should truly be off the table? If so, there are lots of other great options, but [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] is a very lovely choice, goes well with big sister’s name, and baby would keep her first name initial.

Based on your list, it seems you love names that either begin with A or end with an A. Therefore many of the ones I mention below share that characteristic.

[name_f]Alice[/name_f]: if not [name_f]Alyse[/name_f], what about [name_f]Alice[/name_f]? I can see this on a little girl and it growing with her as well. Such a beautiful, charming classic.

[name_f]Clara[/name_f]: meaning bright. A beautiful classic as well. A sweet connection with the sisters sharing a first initial.

[name_f]Eleanor[/name_f]: goes very well with [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f]. It reminds me of [name_f]Evelina[/name_f], just more buttoned up and tailored.

[name_f]Emilia[/name_f]: if not [name_f]Amelia[/name_f], what about [name_f]Emilia[/name_f]? They sound very similar, but maybe [name_f]Emmy[/name_f] for nn rather than [name_f]Millie[/name_f].

[name_f]Emmeline[/name_f]: it reminds me of [name_f]Evelina[/name_f] and [name_f]Amelie[/name_f] combined. Has the length of [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f].

[name_f]Lillian[/name_f]: Husband finds [name_f]Lilliana[/name_f] a bit much, what about the classic & chic [name_f]Lillian[/name_f]? Pairs perfectly with [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f].

[name_f]Sophia[/name_f]: has an international feel that you seem to love, yet also very classic. Again, pairs well with [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f].

[name_f]Stella[/name_f]: meaning star. This one came to mind first after reading your post. A very beautiful option.

I encourage you to feel confident in your choice of changing her name, if that is what you and your husband decide is best. I agree that you should call her by a few different names for a while and see if any give you peace and feel like that one for her. I look forward to hearing what you decide.

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Hello @Anonhoneyb I’m glad that you’ve reached out to the NB community over this dilemma. I hope we can help you find a solution.

Rarely is a name completely perfect, I think the vast majority of the time there will be some things that aren’t 100% right with any name. However in this case, it seems that you love the name, but you really don’t love it for your baby. That’s OK! As you and your partner seem to have compromised a lot on this name, there’s a good chance he’ll be open to changing it, perhaps even relieved himself. Does he know that you can’t bring yourself to say it? I’m sure that he would not want you to feel that way.

I can understand that it feels daunting to bring it up with your daughter too. Having a new baby is a time of huge adjustment and of course you want your daughter to have as smooth a time of it as possible. However, I think she could also understand that the name @yla is making you sad. She could continue to use it as a nn if she wants to, as long as that wouldn’t upset you. Giving her that option could definitely help smooth the transition into her sister’s new name, if that’s what you decide to do.

I think this is a great idea.

I’m wishing you lots of luck in sorting this out with your family. My fingers are crossed for hearing how it has all worked out for you in the near future! :kissing_heart:

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Seconding the idea of trying out a few names on her just for yourself and seeing if it feels any better. I’d also talk to your husband to see how he feels about it too. If you do go ahead with changing her name, I’d do it sooner rather than later though

A couple of suggestions

[name_f]Adeline[/name_f] “Addie/Del/Lina”
[name_f]Aurelia[/name_f] (sister could still call her @yl@)
[name_u]Florence[/name_u] “Floss/Flora/Flo/Ren”
[name_f]Margot[/name_f] “Mari/Mo/Maggie”
[name_f]Emmeline[/name_f] “Emmy”
[name_f]Lillian[/name_f] “Lily/Annie”

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Agree with others that you should change it. How about:

Adeline/Adaline nn [name_f]Ada[/name_f]
[name_f]Adelaide[/name_f] nn [name_f]Ada[/name_f]
Lillian/Lily
[name_f]Clara[/name_f]
[name_f]Rose[/name_f] nn [name_f]Rosie[/name_f]
[name_f]Eloise[/name_f] nn [name_f]Lulu[/name_f]
[name_f]Alice[/name_f]
[name_f]Annabel[/name_f]
[name_f]Ivy[/name_f]
[name_f]Autumn[/name_f]

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I have 6 children. Names are hard for sure. I have a friend who changed her baby’s name when he was 4 months old because she just realized she couldn’t jive with with his name from birth. Nobody even remembers anymore that she changed it. He’s 9 now, so don’t let that stop you!

I think the suggestions you have received are great, and I will say I have a [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f] [name_f]Sophia[/name_f] (my [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f] is 7 as well) and an [name_f]Ava[/name_f] [name_f]Rose[/name_f] and the names go perfectly together. When I’m yelling for these 2 peas in a pod it rolls nicely off the tongue.:rofl:I could be biased.:see_no_evil::rofl:

Other suggestions echoing some above:
[name_f]Lillian[/name_f]
[name_f]Lily[/name_f]
Lyla/Lila (also another daughter but hey maybe we have similar tastes. Lol)
[name_f]Olivia[/name_f]
[name_f]Nora[/name_f]
[name_f]Mila[/name_f]

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[name_m]Hi[/name_m] there.

Is it pronounced Aye-luh or Eye-luh? I think it’s the former, right? With a long ‘a’? What if you used it as a nn, but changed her official name to something else. The first thing that came to mind was [name_f]Azalea[/name_f] nn Ayl@. [name_f]Pretty[/name_f], right? [name_u]Or[/name_u] [name_f]Aurelia[/name_f]? If neither or those ideas appeal to you, then you should just flat out change it. [name_u]Or[/name_u]! You could make Ayl@ her mn. You could change the whole name to something that you prefer like Ameli@ (my favorite from your list!) Ayl@. Ameli@ Ayl@ & you can call her by her first & middle name. It’s a bit of a mouthful, but eventually you can transition to her fn only. And your older daughter could still call her little sister by her mn as a pet name, you know?

[name_f]Hope[/name_f] my rambling helps. :slight_smile:

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I would say your best chance at inner peace and respect from others would be to change the name quickly and for good. Changing the name once isn’t as rare as you might think. But your level of conviction will likely determine how much people respect it. You didn’t list a single bad name among your other considerations. Follow your gut and don’t look back!

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Yes pronounced aye-la

It does help! Thanks!

Thank you so much for the replies. So many great ideas and support.

I do like the name @urelia, and also noted the ‘ay lee uh’ sounds was similar, my husband wasn’t a huge fan but I guess if could be her more formal name?

Aylie or ayls has been the nn that seem to have come up.

[name_f]My[/name_f] husband was all for the change from the beginning and even a couple of weeks ago but we once again couldn’t decide on a name to replace it with that I was 100% sure of. Penelop3 was another option but it’s quite long and I’m not a huge fan of P3nny as a nn. Having said that we don’t use Charli3 as a nickname for my daughter as I didn’t like it and she’s never been called that so I guess the nn are up to us to an extent. Unless I’ve got a solid idea on what name Id want I feel stupid to bring it up again.

I wish I could just pick a name and not overthink it but I love hearing nice name combos with meaning I just want the perfect name for my darling girl.

I wouldn’t let [name_u]Penny[/name_u] stop you from using [name_f]Penelope[/name_f] of that’s the name that feels right for both of you. It could be nn [name_f]Nellie[/name_f] or [name_f]Pippa[/name_f] if you want a nickname (probably more options too that I’m not thinking of).

I agree with many others that you should go ahead and change the name. I’m sorry you’re having such a difficult time choosing another name.

If [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] is the favorite, but you don’t want to use that exact name, what about [name_f]Audriana[/name_f] (or Audrianna)? You could use [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] as a nickname. Other similar names would be [name_u]Adria[/name_u], [name_f]Audra[/name_f], or [name_f]Adriana[/name_f].

If you like [name_f]Alyse[/name_f] but can’t use it, maybe you would like [name_f]Elise[/name_f]? Others that feel similar to me are [name_f]Alyssa[/name_f], [name_f]Alicia[/name_f], [name_f]Eliza[/name_f], & [name_f]Alice[/name_f].

If you want something similar to [name_f]Ayla[/name_f] maybe you’d like:
[name_f]Alaina[/name_f] (Alayna)
[name_f]Alanna[/name_f] (Alana)
[name_f]Alia[/name_f] (Aliya)
[name_f]Ada[/name_f]
[name_f]Ava[/name_f]
[name_f]Layla[/name_f] (Laila, [name_f]Leila[/name_f], Leyla)
[name_f]Kayla[/name_f]
[name_u]Aria[/name_u]
[name_f]Eva[/name_f]
[name_f]Isla[/name_f]
[name_f]Lilah[/name_f]

Piping in to add “Audrina” as an option. [name_f]Beautiful[/name_f] name, love [name_f]Audra[/name_f], [name_f]Ada[/name_f], [name_f]Rina[/name_f] nicknames.

Good luck, so many great options in this thread!

Firstly, don’t feel bad, you would not believe the amount of posts on here that are almost identical. If you search baby name regret I bet you’ll find hundreds of them! So you’re not alone in this feeling.

The name you have chosen is lovely but if you really aren’t happy and you think this feeling is going to stay with you then start discussing things with your husband and see if he feels the same. It might help you to decide what you want to do.

In terms of names which go well with [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f], out of everything on your list I would go with [name_f]Alice[/name_f] but spelt traditionally. I also really like [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] and wonder if the reason is really strong enough not to go with a name you both clearly really like.

I think part of the reason you’re doubting the name you’ve chosen is because it feels like a compromise, but it is beautiful and I do think it goes well with your other daughter’s name. I also think that this baby name regret phenomenon can come hand in hand with the baby blues so the best thing you can do right now is talk to those around you about how you’re feeling. Whatever you do, try not to stress about it too much and enjoy this precious time with your baby as they don’t stay little for long :two_hearts:

Aylara or Aylaura
Ayla-Ren
Ayla-Wren
Ayla-Rain
Aylaraine
Aylashae
Ayla-Shae
Ayla-Beth
Ayla-Joy
Aylaina
Aylaine
Aylaya
Ayla-Dawn
Aylandra
AylaJane
Aylajean

Thoughts on Av@ Lilian@?
It might help make a smooth transition, doesn’t sound too different and not huge change…? [name_m]Can[/name_m] still call her Ay1a…

[name_u]Or[/name_u] as I think Aylie would be a nickname we would’ve used for Ay1a, [name_f]Lili[/name_f] (nn for Li1iana) doesn’t sound too different to that. But it is a different initial. Ay might be another nickname…
So stressful…
Thank you for the earlier responses!

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I think it’s a beautiful option. I wouldn’t really focus on picking a name that makes a transition easy though. She’s so young you could pick something completely unrelated with a completely unrelated nickname to the name she has now and it will be ok. [name_m]Just[/name_m] focus on finding the name that you and your husband love and if this new option is it then go with it!