Fair warning–this is a very long one! But if you’re willing to read, I’d really love to hear your thoughts.
I’ve been thinking a lot recently about how subconscious biases stemming from racism and classism might show up in naming spaces. Nameberry is easily the most thoughtful, open-minded, and compassionate naming community I’ve had the privilege of participating in–I’m so grateful for you all, and I’m guessing I’m not the first person here who’s thought about this. I’d love to talk about it!
Lots of us like names that feel “distinctive” or “underused.” We’re comfortable borrowing from 19th century census records, mythology, our family trees, etc. to find names that feel unusual and special. But many of us—not just on Nameberry, but on virtually all of the name forums I frequent (often much more aggressively on the other forums)—seem to hold some level of disdain for so-called “creative” names. We can be skeptical and sometimes very critical of new spellings and variations of “traditional” names, and perhaps even more so of names that seem completely “invented.” I wonder why?
I’ll speak for myself in saying that familiarity does play a big role for me—I often like a name increasingly the second, fifth, and tenth time I see it. I also think a lot about ease and wearability of a name, and sometimes it does feel like picking the most popular spelling could make a child’s life a little bit easier. But all of that is so context-dependent, right? Whether or not a name is familiar, socially-acceptable, or easy to wear depends so much on the community you’re surrounded by.
And besides, those factors probably don’t account for all of our feelings about “creative” names. Because if they did, we’d also be reluctant to consider extremely unusual but “traditional” names—and by and large, we’re not. Maybe for some of us meaning plays a role. But then again, does a name really have to be searchable on Nameberry to have meaning? [name_m]Can[/name_m]’t it hold special meaning to the family that created it—just as much as a name with established dictionary roots?
Part of what I love about naming spaces is that each of us have our own unique style and taste. I’ll be the first to admit I have strong opinions! And for many of us, “traditional” or “old” or “classic” names may be our thing. I’m just trying to be cognizant, personally, of where my opinions are coming from. Does a name genuinely seem offensive or easily-tease-able? [name_f]Do[/name_f] I actually dislike the way it looks or sounds? Or are my implicit biases coming into play? The word “trashy,” for instance, gives me pause when it comes to describing names. That and lots of other coded language can be used to describe names that we’ve been subtly conditioned to dislike because of the social statuses we associate with them.
I know I’ve been guilty of letting subconscious biases influence my naming opinions myself, and it’s something I’m working on. And I still have plenty of questions about how to constructively and honestly express my opinions (when they’re solicited, of course!) while ensuring that they aren’t rooted in bias. I’ve found several interesting articles on the subject of name-related racism and classism recently; I’d be happy to share resources if people are interested.
But I’m also really curious to hear others’ thoughts on this! What is it about “creativity”—a word that usually has very positive connotations—that people can sometimes find off-putting when it comes to names? [name_f]Do[/name_f] you like creative naming styles? Have you noticed any variation in how widely accepted different naming styles are on different sites/forums? [name_f]Do[/name_f] you think we, as a community, could be more open-minded towards “creative” or “invented” names? Or do you disagree with me entirely that naming spaces tend to skew towards disliking creative names? I’d love to hear your musings, regardless!