I’m wondering if other Berries are ever slightly disappointed by the name announcements from friends and family or their wider social circle?
For example some friends recently had a darling little girl, they talked for ages about how her name was super unique - it was [name_f]Cora[/name_f]. Which is a name that is lovely, but not what I was expecting for their ‘really unique’ name. Or another friend who has a little boy named [name_m]Andrew[/name_m] [name_m]Matthew[/name_m] - and I wonder about flow.
Similarly an old school friend who had a little boy, and she had always (at school and during the pregnancy) talked quite seriously about using [name_m]Bartholomew[/name_m], [name_m]Thaddeus[/name_m] or [name_m]Hezekiah[/name_m]. And her gorgeous little boy is [name_m]Jacob[/name_m].
Or when you see an announcement for a little [name_f]Lily[/name_f], or [name_f]Ava[/name_f], or [name_u]Noah[/name_u], and sort of think ‘it’s a lovely name, but there are so many others!’.
I’m not saying there is anything wrong with these names at all! I generally like all of these names, and even if I didn’t it wouldn’t matter because it’s not my child. And I certainly haven’t told any of the parents that I feel their names are at best ‘eh, nice’ rather than ‘stunning’. These names are all great, I just can’t help but feel a little disappointed because there are so many incredible names out there and I feel like I’m hearing the same 7 on repeat.
I’m also aware that many of the names in my signature are probably part of that list, which is partly due to compromise with the ([name_f]IMO[/name_f] picky with very boring name taste) SO, so I can understand why I meet children where the names may have involved compromise, or they could have family importance.
But I just feel that pang sometimes when a name is announced. Is it just me? I’m hoping it doesn’t make me a bad person.
I get this when there’s like two main names on the list, one that I [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] and suits the child perfectly and the other that’s boring and just eh and the parents choose the eh one. One of the kids I know had [name_u]Kit[/name_u] [name_u]Avery[/name_u] as one of his possible names and J0hn M@rkus as the other one and the parents chose [name_m]John[/name_m] and I literally wanted to scream, especially as he gets older he looks more and more like a [name_u]Kit[/name_u] and [name_m]John[/name_m] is the exact opposite of his fun personality. We do call him [name_m]Jack[/name_m] but I just feel like it’s such as waste when his perfect name was one on the list.
I think as name nerds, especially when it’s a friend, we take “bad” or not right names a little harder because we understand the importance and love names, it definitely doesn’t make you a bad person.
Yes, yes, I know this exact feeling. Of course you love the new little baby and in time the name grows to completely fit the child and you don’t even think about it any more, but I have definitely experienced this “name disappoint” when friends or family have announced their babys names.
Somewhat similar to your [name_m]Thaddeus[/name_m]/[name_m]Hezekiah[/name_m] ended up being [name_m]Jacob[/name_m] story, a close friend talked about naming her son [name_u]Paxton[/name_u], which I think is quite awesome, but ended up giving him a much more generic name like [name_u]Aiden[/name_u].
There are also those situations where the parents’ combo for one gender is much better than their option for the other. A friend of a friend was expecting and had picked something super tryndee and, well, yikes-inducing for a girl, while her boy choice was the much more pleasant [name_m]Cy[/name_m]. It was such a secondhand relief when she had a boy!
Yes! I was disappointed to hear my cousin named her son [name_u]Jaden[/name_u]. I work at a school and hear [name_u]Jayden[/name_u]/[name_u]Aiden[/name_u]/[name_u]Kayden[/name_u] all day long. He’s just another [name_u]Jaden[/name_u] with a last initial.
Oh also my brother in law just had twins…I haven’t met them yet but I heard their names are [name_m]Fernando[/name_m] and [name_f]Fernanda[/name_f]. I want to scream in my head.
All the time. I’m into a wide variety of names (my own personal style is pretty out there to most), but to me names are an incantation, a song, something magical that should flow and have imagery. I find a lot of disappointment when people name their kids after themselves, or something super popular. Though, I do understand that that’s important to them (passing along a name) or they really just like popular names. Not my cup of tea!
Hahaha… yes, I am guilty of this. I don’t hate any of the names, but I’m often a bit sad at the lack of imagination some people have… but then, each to their own of course!
I think the latest one was our niece [name_f]Lucy[/name_f]. We had had a run of unique baby names, so when they announced she was [name_f]Lucy[/name_f] I was a bit like “oh… is that all…” (love her chubby cheeks to the moon though!)
Yes! I know a few babies born this year, and with the exception of my new cousin [name_m]Xander[/name_m], they’ve all been very “meh”-inducing. Nice names, very sweet kids, but it makes me sad that the parents had an opportunity to choose something really interesting and uncommon and they choose [name_f]Hollie[/name_f] instead.
The thing that drives me more crazy is when they choose boring middle names! I understand sticking to something more conservative for a first name, to try and protect them from teasing and maybe help them be taken more seriously as an adult. But for a middle name you can pick something way cooler - yet 9/10 times it’s [name_m]John[/name_m] or [name_f]Rose[/name_f]. And it never flows with the full name very nicely either. I can’t express this to anyone in my life because to them, names are no big deal and I suppose no baby’s life is going to be very adversely affected by a name with bad rhythm but…still. It’s annoying.
Yep! It happens quite often, actually. I know that we all have different name tastes and that parents typically chose something that has great meaning and beauty to them, but…yeah. For instance, I found out a girl that I grew up with his having a little boy. She posted his initial, B, on Facebook and openly discussed various choices…[name_m]Bram[/name_m], [name_m]Brennon[/name_m], [name_m]Beckett[/name_m], [name_m]Bruno[/name_m], [name_m]Boston[/name_m], etc. All are very unheard of in our area and I was super curious to learn what the name was. Turns out…it is [name_m]Brantley[/name_m]. [name_m]Brantley[/name_m]. One of the most popular names in our area. [name_m]Brantley[/name_m]. Named after a country singer. I’m still a bit bitter over the missed opportunities in this case…lol.
I completely know what you mean! There’s generally nothing wrong with the name, it’s just too popular for me. I know two baby [name_m]George[/name_m] [name_m]Harrys[/name_m] and I was a little disappointed when I found out what their names were. Also, my cousin has two daughters called [name_f]Annie[/name_f]-[name_f]Mae[/name_f] and [name_f]Alyssa[/name_f]-[name_f]Rose[/name_f]. She was originally going to follow the ‘starts with A and is hyphenated’ theme by calling her third daughter [name_u]Avery[/name_u]-[name_u]Beau[/name_u]. However due to personal reasons she changed it to [name_f]Harlow[/name_f]. I understand why she did it and personally I prefer [name_f]Harlow[/name_f] to [name_u]Avery[/name_u] but it irks me that the pattern was broken.
Yes!
People who aren’t name nerds and don’t follow name trends probably think [name_f]Cora[/name_f] is still in the 600s, like it was some 10 years ago.
I watched an interview with [name_f]Emily[/name_f] Blunt and she said they gave their daughters old lady names - [name_f]Hazel[/name_f] and [name_f]Violet[/name_f].
Both of those are in the top 100. But they probably don’t follow name trends and don’t know it.
(I don’t really mind popular names though. I’d name my daughter [name_f]Emma[/name_f] despite it being so popular.)
I understand this, but I don’t actually relate to it.
As much as I enjoy pondering over names, I don’t much care for them in real life. They just don’t strike me as important. My reaction to a situation where, say, a family member picked [name_u]Taylor[/name_u] over [name_f]Delphine[/name_f] would be: Oh, I might have preferred you use something else that was on your list, but it ultimately isn’t my decision and doesn’t make that much of a difference.. And, there is also the fact that other people don’t actively care for names as much as we do - flow and popularity aren’t as much a concern, etc. It would also be plenty hypocritical of me to judge when I’d pick [name_m]Jack[/name_m] over [name_m]Lysander[/name_m] and [name_f]Rose[/name_f] over [name_f]Persephone[/name_f] any day, and I don’t care for flow at all.
Yes! Omg when my god sister had her son “Nathanule” I rolled my eyes so hard and then she had [name_u]Dorian[/name_u] and I felt even worse for poor Nathanule. Although she has recently taken to calling him by his middle and [name_m]Sabastian[/name_m] and [name_u]Dorian[/name_u] is a lot better.
When my sister’s bff was expecting her daughter I was excited because she likes traditional names that aren’t heard of much anymore, her first child is [name_m]Andrew[/name_m]. She was considering beatrice which i loved but she went with [name_f]Caraline[/name_f] (karah-line).
I think it’s because as a name nerd I know what other options are out there and I understand how spellings, popularity etc affect kids lives.
Now that all of my friends are having babies I actually find myself a little relieved when they choose a common name or one that isn’t my taste.
I’m currently pregnant and have this fear that they’ll ‘steal’ my name and then it won’t be an option for me anymore since we are in the same social circles! I do love reading birth announcements of people I don’t know and swooning over the interesting names there though!
I’m sure once I’m done having babies I can go back to enjoying hearing my friends choices, but until then I’ll just be a little on edge that someone might take ‘my’ names lol
It only bothers me a little when I see very trendy, youneek names or ones that are probably gonna cause problems for the kid. I’ve known a Cashlynn, [name_u]Love[/name_u], [name_f]Princess[/name_f], and several [name_f]Braelynn[/name_f]/[name_f]Kaylynn[/name_f]/Haelynns. And my friend’s two sisters are [name_u]Story[/name_u] and Svynn ([name_u]Seven[/name_u]).
This exactly. When I find out a friend or family member is expecting, I wind up holding my breath until I found out their chosen name – especially if I think their style might be similar to mine. It’s a little selfish, but until I have little ones of my own all named, I’ll enjoy the relief I get.
BUT I do get a little grumbly about names with yooniek spellings or that might cause issues for the kid. (As relieved as I am that Kaiden isn’t on my list, I do get a little bit of “really?!” when I hear that name has been used AGAIN.) I also find bad flow really aggravating (like in PP’s Andrew Matthew example) but even that is pretty subjective most times.
I don’t really feel bad for kids with generic or “trendy” names as long as they are spelled correctly, haha. My boyfriend is from a country where most people share their names with many others they know, even young kids, and it doesn’t seem like it’s a big deal for most of them. There are like three guys in his friend group that have the same name, but they go by their surnames, middles or unrelated nicknames. So I don’t really feel like it’s such a terribly bad thing to have a name that many other people have. The only things that make me cringe are misspelled names honestly…
This is perfectly normal, lol! I can’t say whether it’s mean or not, though. I will say that I’ve blinked at a few names that came out in birth announcements in my circle. One was [name_m]Jaden[/name_m]. Super, super common unisex name and, as far as I know, it’s not an honor name. I thought it was weird because the older siblings’ names have more classic/honor first names similar to [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] and [name_m]James[/name_m].
In another circle, there is a sibset [name_m]Strider[/name_m] and [name_f]Valorie[/name_f]. Yeah, in those exact spellings. My phone is forever auto correcting [name_f]Valorie[/name_f] to Calorie. Now, she’s just called [name_f]Sissy[/name_f]. I think it’s weird as heck, even as they grow.
On the other side of this, I’ve watched people get discouraged or upset by people’s reactions to the names they loved for their own child. More particularly, it’s usually a mother in law who is determined to have things her way regarding her grandchildren and those kind are rude as heck, insisting on names they like (which usually sucks, from what I have seen). I’ve seen a lot of stories where people forged ahead with the names they chose despite people actually telling them they didn’t like those names. Then, it turned out that it didn’t matter because the kid made the name, not the other way around.
It’s because of this I would most likely wait until the birth to announce the baby name if I become a mother. People can get pretty vicious when it comes to babies and naming! I totally judge, don’t get me wrong, as you’ve seen above, but I don’t enjoy being rude out loud, either. So all judgment happens in my head.
This, I get more anxious that they are going to take a name on my list then anything else. My fiance and I have decided though close friends and children who share the same grandparents (so my sisters and half-brothers children, and my fiances sisters children) CANNOT share the same first name, or very similar names. Middle names are fine to share and their first name as a middle for us is fine too. So [name_f]Olivia[/name_f], [name_f]Emmalyn[/name_f], [name_u]Francis[/name_u] and [name_f]Melina[/name_f] are off the table for that reason, and we wouldn’t want to name our child [name_f]Livia[/name_f] [name_f]Juliet[/name_f] for this reason, but [name_f]Juliet[/name_f] [name_f]Livia[/name_f] is fine for us.
In real life it does bother me sometimes when sibsets do not match at all. I know a set of sisters named [name_f]Olivia[/name_f], [name_f]Sophia[/name_f] and [name_u]Sawyer[/name_u] and [name_u]Sawyer[/name_u] sticks out like a sore thumb for me.
