I was wondering how many berries have had the experience of finding a name and “just knowing” it was the right one! It is a little like falling in love, isn’t it? I think you can love a name – but have some uneasiness about using it. I think you can like a name – but not be convinced you like it enough or wonder if there is a better name out there. But sometimes you come across a name – and you just know!
Has anyone else had this experience? What other experiences have you had naming? Has someone ever chosen a name with grave reservations but come to completely love that name over time?
Let’s talk about naming as – well – a relationship!
I wondered about this when I was pregnant with my first, and then after it happened, I realized it was true- you do just know when the name is right.
We had been discussing names for months and months, and then one day I came across [name]Kai[/name] on the social security list and just knew it was the one. Can’t quite describe why, but it was just a feeling I couldn’t shake, so I was determined to convince my husband, who originally didn’t like it.
I think that’s why naming #2 has been so hard because I’m waiting for that same feeling.
With my first baby we didn’t find out the sex until he was born. We were planning to name him [name]Peter[/name] [name]Sebastian[/name] if he were a boy. Loved both names throughout the whole pregnancy.
Second baby was a girl. Had a terrible time coming up with her name. My husband finally named her [name]Laura[/name] when she was born. We picked [name]Elizabeth[/name] for her middle name because it is my fave girl’s name. But I couldn’t decide what nn to use so I was ambivalent about [name]Elizabeth[/name] as a first name.
Right now I’m trying to choose some lighting for my house. I already chose a ceiling light for the bedroom three months ago, but now it is discontinued. So now I’m back to square one. I am going to rely on my husband to help me finalize lighting choices for the kitchen and the bedroom. He has good taste in lighting as well as in girls’ names!
Thanks for sharing stories. I’m sure there are people out there who have had the opposite experience – they have gone with a name because of SO or because it was a family or because it was a compromise, and then grown to completely love that name. But I do like that ah ha feeling when something you know is perfect!
I do think you know when you have the right name for your baby. My husband and I had the hardest time coming up with a name for our 3rd, but we finally agreed on a name that wasn’t a favorite of mine. I had always liked it, but never planned on using it (more common than I like). But the name just felt right and no matter how hard I tried to come up with something else, nothing else seemed to fit him. Now that he is here, his name is perfect for him and suits him just right.
That’s why I think it is weird when people try to name their children before they are even pregnant. The name you might come up with won’t necessarily feel right for your child once you are pregnant. That is also why I don’t like naming babies after family members (i.e naming the first son after the paternal grandfather etc.) just for the sake of tradition.
Not that this is at ALL like naming a human being, but hubby and I never “just knew” with our dog’s name. We made a list of favorites and the name we chose won out largely because it didn’t have any human associations (we didn’t know anyone with the name, wasn’t a name we’d consider for future children, etc.). I never felt passionate about the name, I just liked it, and felt happy about calling our dog (who, let’s face it, is more like a kid to us than a dog!). A few days after we got him, and had been calling him that name, I fell in love with it and now I absolutely cannot imagine him with another name!
So I guess, if that’s anything at all like naming a baby, it is possible to not be in love with the name and fall for it after the fact. I think a child will grow into whatever name they have, and once you’ve called them that for awhile, it’s impossible to think of them any other way.
I’ve had family members – or their spouses – picks out baby names I didn’t love or names even disliked. But when you love the child, you love the name. Of course it is different if it is a name not under your control. If you are doing the choosing, I think you really want to feel that click that lets you know you are right. But from my experience with nieces and nephews’ names, I would say you can grow to love unexpected and even odd choices others make.
Now my nieces and nephews are older, old enough to dislike their names, and I find myself defending names at which I originally raised an eyebrow.
Sigh* I had that feeling with a name I came across…[name]FELIX[/name]! Instantly felt like that was the boy in my belly. Unfortunately hubby turned it down. Hhoping that feeling will come again!!!
