I have recently begun TTC, and I’ve shared our plans with a few close friends. Because I’m hoping for a boy, we refer to it as “having a [name_m]Ben[/name_m]” (because our son’s name would be [name_m]Benjamin[/name_m], and because we’re a little weird!). Obviously, we’re aware we might have a girl, and rest assured we’ll love her to pieces, too. But because we’ve been referring to our someday child only as “[name_m]Ben[/name_m]”, our friends don’t know our top contender for a daughter is [name_f]Annabel[/name_f], because a) it’s based on my nana’s name and b) we like it! We’ve jokingly referred to the possibility of having a daughter as “Girl-[name_m]Ben[/name_m]”. (I promise we aren’t jerks… it’s completely silly!)
One of my friends sent me a picture yesterday of a new puppy she plans to buy this weekend. She said, “The breeder calls her xxxxx, but I am definitely going to change it.” A few minutes later, she says, “I think I’ll name her [name_f]Annie[/name_f].”
Immediately, I responded-- without really thinking-- “No! Girl-[name_m]Ben[/name_m] would be [name_f]Annabel[/name_f] and we’d call her [name_f]Annie[/name_f]!” She may not be clear that I really would be upset if she used my baby name on her dog, but she has continued to refer to her pup-to-be as [name_f]Annie[/name_f].
Now, tell me the truth: am I being a jerk for being annoyed at this? Should I let it go? Should I use a second place contender for Girl-[name_m]Ben[/name_m]?
It’s not a big deal. [name_m]How[/name_m] much time do you really expect your child to spend with your friend’s dog?? Also, dogs have relatively short lifespans, and your child’s actual name would be [name_f]Annabel[/name_f], not [name_f]Annie[/name_f]. I’d let it go. If it really bothers you, discuss it w/your friend again in a reasonable/non-emotional way, but again, I’d let it go.
A great deal of it depends on your friend and your relationship with her. I think there are three options are to mention the name you have picked out and if she is the considerate sort she might take it upon herself to change the name. You could politely ask her not to use it, or you could say nothing and just get used to the idea that a friend has your child’s name which is fairly common now that the thing is to give pets people names or find a new name. I wouldn’t really recommend the third unless talking to your friend would cause more drama than it is worth. I wouldn’t let it cause too much drama, is a name worth more than a friend?
I kinda agree with rkrd’s comment above. Hopefully, it’ll be a boy! I think [name_f]Annabel[/name_f]'s a lovely name, so you could also call your future little girl [name_f]Annabel[/name_f] instead of [name_f]Annie[/name_f].
I’m not going to cause any drama over it. I’ve already told her that it’s a name we plan to use if we have a girl, and it’s clear that I was a little annoyed about it… mostly because she’s the type to come visit my new baby and say something like, “so you named her after my dog?”. I’m mostly annoyed because she’s not attached to it… it came to her on a whim and she said “I think I’ll name her…”. If she was attached to it, it’d be different. I’m hormonal.
I’d honestly let it go. [name_f]Annabel[/name_f] has other nicknaming options- [name_f]Anna[/name_f], [name_f]Ann[/name_f], [name_f]Belle[/name_f], [name_f]Elle[/name_f], [name_f]Ella[/name_f], or even [name_f]Bella[/name_f]. Your friend didn’t steal your babies name, [name_f]Annie[/name_f] is a common dog name. You never know, she might have loved the name [name_f]Annie[/name_f] and decided to use it on a dog besides her child because she knew you loved it. I truly hope I helped. I hope I didn’t come off as rude, I didn’t mean it that way at all!
I wouldnt get into a squabble with your friend. There are just SOOO many variables that could change before you have your baby that would make the issue a non-issue… it could be a boy, she could change her mind, you could change your mind, etc etc. Hormones are crazy! Dont give into them. Plus, I had a huge babyname list and then when I actually got pregnant, I felt differently about a lot of those names. Its different when it will actually be your child’s name… you might not even like [name_f]Annabel[/name_f] or all of the sudden have a hormonal, gut desire to name her something else. I did!
Get a cute guinea pig etc that you’ll truly care for / truly love and name it after your “friend”. Introduce them to each other next time she visits. And then continue with your plans on calling your baby girl [name_f]Annabel[/name_f]/ [name_f]Annie[/name_f].
Yep, that reaction is firmly in jerk territory. [name_f]Annie[/name_f] is a common name for both dogs and humans - I know one of each - and you really can’t call dibs. Sorry.
I have to agree with this. It’s a popular name for both species. I have a dog named [name_f]Annie[/name_f] as well. You shouldn’t attempt to dictate what another person calls their pet, child, etc. because it doesn’t fit with your plans to give your child that name. That said, regardless of what other people use or think name your child what you love.
She can name the dog [name_f]Annie[/name_f]. You can’t claim dibs on a name that you may never use. To be irritated about it is unnecessarily dramatic.
I’m not suggesting that nobody calls their dog [name_f]Annie[/name_f], or denying that some do. I’m just saying, if she’s a good friend, and she’s unattached to the name, it’d be a nice gesture for her to pick something else. I would certainly do so if my friend objected to a name I was considering for a pet.
As an aside, I know names are very meaningful to some people (presumably all of us here!) but my friend isn’t one of them. I named her first dog!
I know at least seven cats and three dogs with my name, or a nickname version of my name. I’ve never seen a problem with it. Some people like to give “people” names to their pets.
[name_f]My[/name_f] in-laws called their cat the name my husband and I have loved separately since we were both small. Obviously I didn’t say anything at the time as it was 7 years ago and we are only getting round to naming actual children now. More annoyingly recently they named their dog the name I wanted for a girl, [name_f]Tilly[/name_f], I thought about it hard and told them before they got the dog. They laughed and called her [name_f]Tilly[/name_f] anyway. Since announcing our pregnancy they have mentioned it I think they are somewhere between thinking it’s funny and feeling a little bit bad. I’m hopeful that by the time we have a third the dog will be old and maybe we’ll use it anyway (probably as a nickname for [name_f]Ottilie[/name_f] so I hope we could use a different nickname until the dog was gone.However I defiantly love the name less since it’s been used on a dog that I see almost daily.
All I’d say is it’s a friends dog you wont see it a lot, if you already said something and she did nothing you’re going to have to ignore it and decide how much you love the name whether it will outweigh the inconvenience of her choice.
Yeah, you can’t reserve a name, especially for a baby that doesn’t exist yet. When your girl-[name_m]Ben[/name_m] comes along, you may just stick with [name_f]Annabel[/name_f]. I wouldn’t care too much at this point in time.
[name_f]My[/name_f] thought exactly. I would definitely be upset and discuss it with her. Ideally, she would choose another name for her dog. BUT in case she refuses to, I think I’ll get over it and choose an alternative nickname for my daughter. Our friendship is more important.
The headline in Facebook post of this thread said “Please don’t use my baby name for your !@#?*! dog!!!”. I found that a bit insulting, hopefully it was not in the original post. I mean, please don’t use such horrible language about loved pets.
In my opinion it is just as stupid to “steal” a friend’s baby name and use it for a dog as it would be to use it for a baby. The friend is obviously being inconsiderate. But in the name of etiquette I’d recommend anyone to remember that pets are loved family members for many and expressions like !@#?*! dog are rude.
[name_f]My[/name_f] husband is named [name_u]Max[/name_u] so we have encountered quite a few pets that he shares a name with and it’s rarely a source of confusion and never upsets him in any way. I think you did the right thing by informing the friend right away that [name_f]Annie[/name_f] would be your girl name, but you really can’t do much besides give them that info…what they do with it is up to them. And since they went for it and used [name_f]Annie[/name_f] you have to decide how much it would bother you to have your child share her name with the pet of a friend of yours. Keep in mind that if you let go of [name_f]Annie[/name_f] and pick [name_f]Bella[/name_f] or [name_f]Chloe[/name_f] you could easily run into a cat or dog with those names as well
Yeah, I completely agree with augusta-lee - "Yep, that reaction is firmly in jerk territory. [name_f]Annie[/name_f] is a common name for both dogs and humans - I know one of each - and you really can’t call dibs. Sorry. "
No one can call dibs on a name, wether it is for another baby or a dog.
“annie” doesnt belong to you.
you don’t even know if you will have a girl, AND you want to call her annabel and not annie, which would a nickname.
and i don’t like that you seem to think a dog is not good enough to have a human name - or is it just this one? what’s the problem with sharing a name with an animal? are animals a bad thing or what? do you think it would be humiliating or something like that? if so, this is weird and uncalled for. it’s just a name.
It’s not as if you had found THE super original name that no one else has.
I mean, she didnt steal it after you told her you had chose this name for your potential daughter (that would have not been a nice move from her) - it just happened that the dog’s name might be this one. so i don"t understand what the fuss is about.