Feeling "cold feet" towards a name (in general)

Ok, all my naming issues with this baby are starting to make me wonder about having cold feet towards a name. Does everyone feel this way at one point or another about the name they’ve chosen? Does having “cold feet” mean you’ll have regrets after the baby’s born about the name you chose? I really don’t want to be the next poster on here asking if re-naming a 3 month old is too horrible a thing to do. I just don’t remember being this conflicted when we named our first daughter…I didn’t have any doubts about her name and didn’t freak out when we went to sign the birth certificate. I also was thinking maybe I’m freaking out so much this time because this will most likely be our last child, and I won’t have another chance to name a baby? I don’t know what my problem is, but it is HUGE.

I think your theory about why you might be having “cold feet” is a valid point (that it might be your last child and chance to choose a name). You may also just be more aware of names this time around. Did you do alot of internet research and chatting about your first child’s name? I honestly feel like talking about names and the more people you talk to – can be a disadvantage. Sometimes you just get so many great opions and opinions from various people that you have trouble making a decision. That’s been my experience anyway. I had very very little trouble naming my first two daughters. I came to this site a few months ago since I’m pregnant with twins. I was curious if some twin combos I liked were good and as I started readind, it really caused me to question things, but also get more “intense” about finding names. I don’t really know how to explain it, but I think that might be part of your feelings as well.

I don’t know how common it is for parents to hate a name AFTER they sign the birth certificate and use it for several months. I don’t see it happening all that much in reality. I think as long as you and your husband like the name and feel a connection with it, the baby will become that name. (yes, there are always circumstances and instances that don’t fit this, but in general…). Also, I feel like the post-partum period and new mommy period are so busy that you don’t even have time to consider if you didn’t pick the right name! On the other hand, that time period is a VERY emotional and vulnerable one (especially if you might be having a last child). I would suspect it’s very likely that many or even most new moms question the name as well as everything else about their parenting skills during the time. I think that’s only normal.

I don’t know if all this blabber meant anything, but I did want to offer support and tell you that I do think “cold feet” is normal and perhaps a bit exaggerated by communications on this board. Good luck w/ the rest of your pregancy and I know you will pick a name for your little girl that you love!

Thank you, crunchymama :slight_smile: I forgot to mention that too, when we named [name]Gabriella[/name] I had never gone online to look up names or discuss them. I love [name]Gaby[/name]'s name, but sometimes now after seeing all the posts on nb, I feel it’s so plain! I’ve thought about that before and have wondered if I should just stay away until after we name her. :slight_smile: Anyway, I really appreciate your thoughts and your response.

I’m in the exact same boat. I have mentioned in my own posts how I had my first daughter’s name ([name]Celia[/name]) since I was 8 years old. It was just a quiet name I had tucked away. This time I had a boys name all ready but I wished for a girl. When I got my wish…I was unprepared with a name. We liked [name]Madeleine[/name] but I feared the popularity of [name]Maddy[/name] so much especially with my rare [name]Celia[/name]. So we searched more… Last week I landed on [name]Sadie[/name] [name]Madeleine[/name] and 3 other choices. I remember telling my friend if my husband liked [name]Sadie[/name] [name]Madeleine[/name] I would just go with it.Hands down. I loved that we would be using the madeleine and avoiding the maddy yet having a name like [name]Maddy[/name] as a first name. I was 100% Well that lasted for a little while but I am still tossing back and forth. I accidently call her [name]Maddy[/name] still all the time. Not sure if that is because we had that name for so long or because that is what I should just call her. With all our rationing about names…[name]Sadie[/name] sounds great with [name]Celia[/name], It’s the size name we want, it has the spirit of [name]Maddy[/name](which was one of the major reasons we were going with [name]Madeleine[/name]…my husband loves cute short names) and because it was somewhat unique and feminine… and I love the sound of the whole name…but I still have doubts. I am constantly trying to weigh out if I will regret a name too or choose the wrong one on a whim. Kind of like when I had breakfast at a restaurant this morning and as soon as I ordered wheat toast…I regretted not ordering an english muffin. This would be a much harder mistake. I agree with the other poster that the more you look and the more you discuss names with others the more you are going to confuse yourself. And if you are trying to please others…just forget it. I would create a list of the qualities you want in a name and see if the name you chooses measures up. Try writing it down–[name]Gabriella[/name] and ___________. Finally, this is really dorky but it helped me a bit…Try singing happy birthday to her. It helped me narrow my choice down to [name]Sadie[/name] or [name]Madeleine[/name]. We are probably going to the hospital with those two options but the [name]Happy[/name] Birthday song idea did get me down from 4 to 2. Good luck. Try to enjoy the remainder of your pregnancy without too much fret.

also…what I am hoping is…that it does not really matter what I name her…within a few minutes she will just become that name and I will love her and [name]Sadie[/name] or [name]Madeleine[/name] will mean so much more than just the pretty sounding name that goes well with [name]Celia[/name], it will stand for the child I am holding. Dorky again. But I am hoping its so true…

Awww. I don’t have kids yet, but I love the idea of imagining singing happy birthday to kid to figure out how the name fits in your mind!


[name]Just[/name] wanted to tell you that I had a similiar experience with names and calling the baby that name. I was “obsessed” with the name [name]Irena[/name]. I don’t completely know why because I wasn’t pronouncing it write. I wanted the name [name]Irene[/name] w/ an A sound at the end and that is what I called one of the babies literally since the moment I found out I was expecting (I’m having twins, so I did feel bad that I only had one name). Over time, I realized I didn’t see this name actually working for me (mostly for pronunciation, but also because I couldn’t find a twin sister for her). Anyway, after selecting different names, I continued to call baby '"[name]Irena[/name]" and I felt terrible and really started questioning myself! I think it was just a habit though. I talked/thought it through and made the transition out of using that name.

I think you have a great plan w/ [name]Sadie[/name] and [name]Madeleine[/name]. You are right-- when you get to the hospital, things will all just fall in place.

I also like your [name]Happy[/name] Birthday suggestion. The song is a bit clunky for twins, but I just sang it and I love the way it sounds! I also spend alot of time writing the girls names together… I’m such a dork!


This is my third pregnancy, and [name]EVERY[/name] SINGLE TIME I have over-thought the name to such an extent that I ended up second-guessing it and worrying that it wasn’t the right one. We went to the hospital with #1 with a backup (which was simply switching the first and middle name) [name]JUST[/name] IN [name]CASE[/name] I changed my mind, but I didn’t.

I think you are right on the mark when you say that it’s almost like the MORE you think about it, and obsess over it, the more you question it. I think that just shows how seriously you take the decision. Like the PP said, it’s one thing to regret ordering toast, but this kid will have to live with their name for the rest of their life!

[name]LOVE[/name] [name]Sadie[/name] [name]Madeleine[/name] (my fave spelling for that name, BTW). [name]Sadie[/name] and [name]Celia[/name] sound similar to me, but they have different initials, so I think it will still work. And the plan to go to the hospital with two names is a good one, one will hopefully “feel right” once baby is here and everything is more real.

Good luck with your choice!

I don’t know if you’ve seen any of my other myriad threads :wink: but Madele/ine (I still can’t decide how to spell it) is the very name I keep freaking out about, because it is so common. My husband loves it and I do like it too, and I think one of the problems is I do refer to her and think of her as [name]Maddie[/name] since we’ve been considering this name for a few months. I feel guilty too because I feel like it “fits” her (if that sounds weird) more than any other name we’ve considered. But I’m scared to name her that and then notice that like 1/3 kids is named some form of [name]Maddie[/name] later on. I actually thought about trying to get [name]Brent[/name] to agree to a different first name with [name]Madeleine[/name] as the middle name, too! I got a slight shrug of approval on [name]Cecilia[/name] (this was before I read your post!), but now I feel weird thinking of her as another name! Maybe this is a sign we should just keep Madele/ine, I don’t know. I guess I have a couple months left to decide.

I have one other question, too…[name]Gabriella[/name] isn’t named after anyone, and I’ve been debating using some form of a family name on the new baby…do you guys think that’s a bad idea? I don’t know if [name]Gaby[/name] would wonder why she isn’t named after someone too later on.