foster to adopted name change

Hello, I am new to this site so this is my first post. We have been foster parents for about 8 months and currently have 5 children. They came as 9 year old boy & 2 year old girl, 11 year old boy, and the latest two are a 3 year old girl and 4 year old boy. All cases are starting to lean towards adoption so we are ecstatic about that as we have no biological children and would love to have them with us forever. The first 3 that came to us have typical names that suit them. The last two, however, have very odd names that we honestly hate :confused: The poor little boy will never be able to spell his. It sounds like a medication you would take. They have nicknames and the boy’s nickname is “OK” but kinda weird and we have to spell it out every time we tell someone because they have no idea what we’re saying. The girl’s nickname sounds like for someone more my age than a 3 year old. My question is, do you think they would adjust well if we did a name change should an adoption occur? We can change the names to whatever we want but we would do something similar but easier and more appropriate. What do you all think?

Usually I’d advise against changing a child’s name (especially if they are of talking-age), but if they are unusable/a bit unethical, then I would agree with changing. And perhaps, because of being so odd/hard to spell, they wont be attached to their proper name anyway.

My advice - which is hard to give without knowing names - to proceed would be to keep their nicknames (and keep referring to them by that) and find a full name that fits it (even very loosely).
From there you can transition to calling them slightly different nicknames if you wish (no-one has to have ONE nickname)
E.G. If the girl’s name was Janet, NN ‘Jan’, you could say Jani-Dan/Jani-Dani, as you are transitioning to the name Danielle, then eventually just Dani. (Best example I could think of off the top of my head).
Finding something with similar sounds or beginning letter would be good - if a nickname begins with J for example, you could start calling them by that letter sometimes and transition to a more suitable name beginning with that letter.

3 and 4 years old is very difficult, and I have absolutely no experience with name-changing. I would suggest keeping the nicknames the same - or slowly simplify (Rexone to Rex for example) or use initials or a rhyming name.
It might be difficult for a while, but I’m sure they’d look back and be so appreciative.

This is all pretty theoretical, if you felt comfortable sharing the names and/or nicknames I wouldn’t mind putting in a couple of practical suggestions. But best of luck anyway! :slight_smile: