I’m very aware that it’s not been ‘that long’. But we’ve been actively trying for 10 months. Previous to that I had a miscarriage which caused a lot of complications and I had 9 months on hell with hospitals messing up and lots of scans and procedures. So overall it’s actually more like 19 months of waiting to finally conceive again.
I feel like my body just ain’t having it. I used to fall pregnant so easily even though I have miscarried twice and have one miracle boy who’s almost 4. I just feel so nervous that it’s not happening as quick as it usually does. I suppose I am just here to rant really as I don’t have anyone to talk to about it. We are tracking ovulation and doing the deed when it says we are ovulating I don’t know what more I can do. [name_m]Just[/name_m] feels like a my time is running out as I am getting older and I just feel so frustrated. I am worried that the complications and procedures have ruined my womb and I can’t have anymore kids. (In the UK they won’t even look into it until a year of trying) I just want to give my boy a sibling and it’s just really distressing seeing countless negative tests and having that first bit of blood of your period every month just kills me 
I know lots of others have it a lot worse but I just I guess don’t want to feel alone in this and that’s why I’m here ranting.
@Mimimoo92 I’m sorry you’re having a tough TTC journey and that you’ve been through so much over the last couple of months. [name_m]Long[/name_m] time TTC is just exhausting. When I became overwhelmed by TTC, I stopped everything - tracking, timing, supplements - I just ditched it all because I couldn’t deal with it any longer. We just did things when we felt like it and didn’t worry about timing, etc, and that’s when I fell pregnant with our daughter. I am not saying “just stop trying and it’ll happen”, because that advice is the most annoying thing when you’ve been long-term TTC, but I guess what I’m saying is that it’s okay to take a break if you need it. Look after yourself both physically and mentally. We put so much pressure on ourselves during TTC, especially when it comes to age and “running out of time”. It’s okay to step away and take a breath.
I have had two losses and it took 4 years to finally have a successfully pregnancy, so I understand your frustration and I’m happy to listen to your rantings because I get it. Reach out whenever you need!
[name_m]Can[/name_m] I ask, when you say tracking ovulation, do you mean tracking your cycle or using ovulation prediction kits? I only ask because the hormone that is picked up by ovulation prediction kits can surge and fall multiple times in your cycle and it is not a sure way to know that you’re ovulating or when.
So we tried for our first for 9 months with 0 sign it was going to happen and were moving forward with alternatives because of my PCOS diagnosis. That time period alone was tough and unsure; I can’t imagine the frustration of years and years. But honestly, sometimes it’s best to take a little break. Only you two can decide what’s best for you but it’s okay to let go and take a break for a little while and do a reset on your relationship and intimacy for a few months.
Additionally, perhaps setting aside tracking may help and trying every other day (if that’s manageable) is plenty to max out your chances and can help relieve the stress/nuisance of trying to hit your fertile window. It really does relieve a lot of anxiety for many people, maybe try that for 2 months?
Only you two know what’s best for you and your relationship but don’t let the “getting old” thing make you fearful!
I’ll also add: apps can be notoriously unreliable in tracking ovulation because they make predictions based on averages. I
This!! I only recommend apps like Kindara or [name_m]Read[/name_m] Your Body that are completely manual and do not use algorithms.
Thank you for replying to my rant lovely 
it’s just so distressing that my body can’t just do what I want for once! I just desperately want to give my son a sibling and it just hurts my heart that my body just won’t play ball. I have had a horrendous few years with lots of stress so maybe that’s stopping me from conceiving… We use a digital ovulation kits and I ovulate pretty much the same time every month and do the deed a few days before. On the day of peak fertility and the few days after. So I don’t know where we are doing wrong. Maybe there’s something else at play making things hard. I really envy people that have loads of kids one after another. I wish that was me.
It’ll be time to try again for this cycle next week so I think I’ll this cycle doesn’t work out I may just give myself a few months break. It’s like a full time job tracking, taking pre pregnancy supplements, making sure to do the deed as much as possible. It just all becomes too much. [name_f]My[/name_f] other 3 pregnancies all happened without ovulation tracking just doing it when we want so maybe I do just need to chill out. I suppose I just have that unbearable stress off I want to get pregnant but also I have extreme fear that I’ll lose this baby too. I suppose I just want to get pregnant again right away so I can find out quicker if baby will stick around… I hope that makes sense. It’s just the agony of all the waiting I just want it all to go right for once 
Thank you for replying lovely! We use digital ovulation kits that show my peak fertility at the same time every month. I think I need to stop tracking after this cycle as it’s getting too much and they are so expensive to buy too. Definitely will need to take a break if this cycle doesn’t work out. Only have to wait until next week to try again so fingers crossed it works out this time. [name_m]Just[/name_m] gets so worrying when you conceive so easily in the past but then after all my complications after my last miscarriage things have changed and I am worried I’ll never conceive again. [name_m]Just[/name_m] praying for us to be lucky with this cycle. I know the window for getting pregnant is so small but when you are tracking and trying and doing all the right things and it don’t work I just want to scream.
I am sorry this is wearing you out so much. Waiting without knowing how long is the worst. One can bear waiting almost any amount of time if they know it’ll be exactly 1 year or whatever, but knowing it might be a month but it might also be 5 years or never is psychological terror.
It’s only two more months until you can start assisted fertility. Try to look forward to that. Of course that doesn’t mean you’ll get pregnant just then, but you will be in much better professional care and get some answers what’s going on. Best of luck to you!
Thank for replying to me lovely. Yeah it’s all really stressful and I just hope and pray we can fall pregnant this cycle. But it is definitely a sort of relief that it’s only a few months until it can be investigated properly.
I’m so sorry [name_m]Ray[/name_m] 
I agree with the previous posters’ advice of putting the focus back on your own mental, emotional, & physical health for a while.
Here’s a few practical tips from my own experience. Of course, I know we have different bodies but maybe something will stick out to you as helpful?
personal experience
One of my main issues was that my cycle was all over the place after having my daughter. I started seed cycling & was able to get my cycle a little more regular. I also tracked my ovulation by checking my cervix in the shower every day (your cervix moves/dilates/softens through your cycle) & paying attention to when I felt ovulation cramping (this is how we got pregnant with my son lol. I felt cramping in one of my ovaries so we had a last minute rendezvous & 13 days later I had implantation bleeding). Some other issues were my chronic yeast infection & that I was using coconut oil as a lubricant (both can be detrimental when trying to conceive). I ditched the coconut oil & started taking probiotics which resolved both issues.
Praying for your peace of mind as you move forward
Hey everyone thank you so much for all the kind comments. I just wanted to come back and sat I AM PREGNANT!!! AHHHHHHHH! all that worry and this cycle it finally worked! Almost 2 years of waiting but we are finally here! I am a mixture of huge excitement and absolutely terrified as I can’t bare to lose this baby too. So please keep me in your prayers. 
🩷:heart:
@Mimimoo92 Yaaaay!!! Amazing!! Congratulations!!! 
Congratulations Ray!! Praying for you & your family