Have you ever disliked any of your names so much that you wanted to change it- even as an adult? Did you change it? Why or why not? Lastly, drop your disliked name and what you wanted to change it to.
I did when I was like 14 [name_f][/name_f]- I didnāt like how my name sounded and that no one knew how to spell it. Now I love it (and didnāt change it). I appreciate my parentās reason for choosing it for me and I love that itās unique and that I wasnāt the fourth āJessicaā in my class.
2 Likes
Is [name_f]Wren[/name_f] your name? I felt the same way about my first name when I was younger, and like it now. I really dislike my middle name and always have. I want to change it, but donāt want to spend the money lol
I had the opposite experience! I always loved my middle name but felt meh about my common first [name_f][/name_f]- started going by my middle in high school and new looked back!! Many people I meet now tell me my middle fits me so much better, and itās very heartening 
1 Like
Yes, often, but I havenāt [name_f][/name_f]- or probably wonāt [name_f][/name_f]- because I canāt settle on anything I like better and I also because I go from disliking to feeling neutral about my name so it doesnāt feel worth the effort or potential backlash for me personally.
1 Like
@raqi[name_f][/name_f] No, wren in my username was because itās my mumās favourite bird (and now itās my daughterās middle name). [name_f]My[/name_f] name is [name_f]Karrah[/name_f]. I donāt have a middle name. [name_f]My[/name_f] maiden name was long and hyphenated, and my parents thought a middle name would just make life complicated. I still wish I had a middle name (although, that probably sounds silly).
1 Like
Iāve never connected to my name (Melissa) at all, but I never legally changed it. Iāve gone by nicknames or just put up with it. [name_f]My[/name_f] middle name is [name_m]Irish[/name_m] and Iāve always loved it. [name_f]My[/name_f] Mum told me that I wouldāve been named by my middle name but it ādidnāt go withā my older sisterās name 
1 Like
My storyās similar. Donāt feel like my real first name - similar to a Jessica, Simone or Catherine.
Love my middle (Eloise) and use it where I can. Wish Iād changed it to Eloise for high school or university - but changing names was socially very peculiar growing up. Stuck now as too old, and my friends use a nickname from my last name, and my family has a bunch of silly ones from my first. And Iāve published in it - not to brag but one of the reasons Iām stuck with it.
If felt free to change, itād be Eloise but from scratch, Frances.
2 Likes
[name_f]My[/name_f] name is rare but sounds similar to a multitude of things which opens it up to much teasing. To me, though, it lacks substance. It lacks what it takes to be āmeā. Not to mention, the numerous spellings people would come up with. Donāt even get me started on the pronunciation. I wanted to change it but couldnāt find a better name that Iād like to jot down on official paperwork. [name_m]Even[/name_m] if I did, it wouldnāt stick around unless I leave everything behind and move some place elseā¦which is highly impractical. And, I think itās uniqueness is probably what makes it āmeā.
[name_f][/name_f]Right now, I go by a nickname that is incredibly common. But it suits me, I feel.
1 Like
Personally I wasnāt fond of my name as a child (or teen) but have since come to a neutral sort of acceptance of it as an adult. The issue mainly stemmed from the fact that my name is the feminine version of a common male name. While my name is not remotely uncommon, in itās feminine version, for whatever reason adults had a major issue with either pronouncing it the masculine way, or simply giving up entirely and giving me the common nickname associated with either version. For me though, the nickname felt very distinctly āmaleā and I did not appreciate being called it.
[name_f][/name_f]All this combined caused me to greatly chaff at my name all the way up into adulthood. Though I should mention that, while such a name did not suit me as a child, I donāt think of it as distasteful on others sharing a similar situation (either traditionally masculine type names on girls, or a feminine version of a male name, as mine was). It was purely personal.
[name_f][/name_f]While all of my friends had pretty, dainty, flowery names, it made me perceive them as more beautiful as a result, thus causing my own self imagery to be rather negative.
[name_f][/name_f]Now, however, as an adult, I can easily separate my perception of self from my (or otherās) perception of my name. But as a child that would be quite a tall order. And I was by no means permitted to pose the question of changing it as a child or teen. By the time I reached adulthood and even realized it was an option, it was far too much of a hassle and there were too many inconveniences associated with such a drastic shift.
[name_f][/name_f]Though honestly these days I donāt have much of an issue, and have accepted it. I feel the main difference between now and childhood is that I can politely but firmly correct mispronunciation as well as soundly reject any use of the nickname. Whereas in childhood, it was considered ārude to correct an adultā.
2 Likes
Mamy times wished to change my first name. [name_f]My[/name_f] father chose it, he always loved it. It feels very basic 80/90/00ās name and I knew like, atleast 4 other people with the exact same first AND middle name as me. I loveee my dad and I always felt it would hurt his feelings to actually change it. Middle name is [name_f]Ann[/name_f] as my mum always loved it and I would have muchh preffered it as a first name. Attempted to try going by my middle name in college but chickened out. I felt like I was being fake. Idk. In an alternate universe, I am [name_f]Ann[/name_f] or annie instead of [name_f]Nicole[/name_f]. Thats all.
1 Like
similar to @/Greyblue ive often thought about changing my name but any option ive considered feels like a fleeting love. when I really think about it too, what I dislike about my name isnāt anything specific to the name itselfā I dislike its popularity and associations, but the name itself fits me fine
[name_f][/name_f]I use a nickname on here which comes from my full name but no one calls me it in real life (maybe someday!) I really dont like my middle name. actually, my parents changed my middle name at the last minute, and if theyād gone with the name they planned on I would feel much more connected to it and might even decide to go by it
1 Like
Yes, both as a child and an adult I have wanted to change my name. I considered changing the spelling, but couldnāt find another that fit me. I donāt know if I will change my first name at that time, but, if I did, I would probably change it to my preferred name. Now Iām looking at adding a second middle when I get the opportunity. I will also be changing my last name when I get the chance.
[name_f][/name_f]I have yet to do so as I was not allowed to change my name in any way, legally, until after I turned 21. Since I turned 21, I have been chronically short of funds for anything beyond everyday living and itās expensive here. Also, when I have brought it up, my mom throws tantrums and shoves my nephews in my face when it comes to changing my last name. [name_m]Even[/name_m] though she knows Iām not comfortable bearing the name due to my personal situation.
[name_f][/name_f]As for my first name, my mom (and therefore her entire family) refuses to acknowledge me by anything other than my given nameā¦ and while she allows nicknames for anyone else, her two biological children are not allowed to have nicknames. [name_m]Even[/name_m] if I change my first name, I will never be called by it by family.
[name_f][/name_f]I would love to change my first name as nobody knows what it is when looking at it written outā¦ nor can they pronounce it when reading it. It is a rare spelling of a common name and people canāt spell it either, even when copying it down from a paper or screen. Not even the person who gave me the spelling. [name_f][/name_f] [name_f]My[/name_f] dad and mom agreed on the name, but not the spelling. When she was passed out after giving birth, he wrote down his preferred spelling and then spent the next so many years blaming my mom for it to his family. When we got together for a family event and it was brought up, I corrected them on the spot. They knew he was a constant liar and most quickly understood the truth of the situation. [name_f]My[/name_f] dad still misspells my name 9 times out of 10.
[name_f][/name_f]Due to the rare nature of the name, I wonāt post it on here.
2 Likes
[name_f][/name_f]
I think thatās exactly where I am at too.
1 Like
CW: Child abuse
[name_f][/name_f]Iāve changed my name twice [name_f][/name_f]- once from my birth name and more recently because I fell completely in love with a name and just wanted it to be mine.
[name_f][/name_f]I donāt hate my birth name because of anything inherent. Itās actually cute [name_f][/name_f]- not necessarily a name I would choose myself, but not a bad name. I came to dislike it more because I associated it with my childhood and my parents, who were unfortunately not very kind or loving people. Hearing my old name makes me feel anxious and wrong because it was used so often as a precursor to being screamed at or hurt.
[name_f][/name_f]I found that for me, having a fresh name helped me reconnect with who I wanted to be and gave me a fresh start. [name_f]My[/name_f] new names I associate with love and power and confidence. I do think people should be allowed to change their name [name_f][/name_f]- for some people, I think it can be really positive and affirming to control their identity in that way. [name_f]My[/name_f] new name makes me smile and feel good about myself.
3 Likes
I actually have always enjoyed my name. I feel it is classic, not overly popular and not overly tied to a specific decade, and has lots of nickname possibilities.
[name_f][/name_f]Though it isnāt my style of name, I havenāt ever wanted to change it.
1 Like
Iāve always hated my first name, and my mother never gave me a middle name because she hated her own middle name (her motherās surname). [name_f][/name_f] In third grade I went through a couple of weeks trying out names for a middle and settled on a variation of my motherās first name ā [name_f]Elayne[/name_f]. [name_f][/name_f] Neither name reallly fits me, though.
[name_f][/name_f]Iāve used [name_m]Milo[/name_m] as my pen name for certain of my published works and now I just go by my surname, [name_m]Owen[/name_m]. [name_f][/name_f] Most of my writing colleagues know me as [name_m]Milo[/name_m].
[name_f][/name_f]If I could have changed my āfemaleā name to anything, I probably would use my Hebrew name, [name_f]Michal[/name_f].
2 Likes
I loved my name as a child and it felt very special because somehow, despite it being in the top 20 when I was born, I was the only one in my entire[name_f][/name_f] primary school. Not just my year, the whole school! And I thought it was pretty. But when I went to high school there were suddenly loads of us with the same name. It lost its shine a bit.
[name_f][/name_f]I also realised when I got older that I was named after a family member who died under sad circumstances, and I already knew my middle name was after a great grandmother, so that left me feeling that my name wasnāt actually mine[name_f][/name_f] [name_f][/name_f]- too popular and borrowed from other people.
[name_f][/name_f]Now, I try to like it and remember that āspecialā feeling it used to have. But it does feel very of-its-time and Iām not sure it suits me. Iām trying to come up with a new nickname that might help me enjoy it, but itās hard to force a nickname. This is why my criteria for baby names are: not top of the charts, not a passing fad, not a direct honour (although I love subtle ones), and plenty of good nickname options!
I wanted to change the spelling of my name, but I always thought my name suited me. Itās [name_f]Eryn[/name_f], I did used to want it to be [name_f]Erin[/name_f] when I was in my teens. Iāve grown to love the spelling now though and I even passed on the āiā to āyā swap to my daughter, although her name is a more common spelling.