Having 2nd thoughts....need opinions please!

After months of debating and really struggling to find the “perfect” name, we had almost 100% decided on [name]Finlay[/name] [name]Theodore[/name] for our baby boy due in [name]May[/name].
I know historically [name]Finlay[/name] is a masculine name, I have Scottish/Irish heritage and I really like the flow with [name]Theodore[/name] (which is a name I love but has the middle spot because DH wouldn’t agree to it as a fn). In the UK it is a very much a boy name, the nn [name]Finn[/name] is a popular standalone boy name here in [name]New[/name] Zealand where I live, but it does seem to have a rapidly rising usage for girls in the US and this has started to worry me. I don’t want my son to have a unisex name, I want him to have a boys name and I definitely don’t want him to get to 10 years old and be asked why he has a girls name! I know that [name]Theodore[/name] balances it out as a full name, but he obviously isn’t going to go by both names on a day to day basis.

So…what are you honest opinions about [name]Finlay[/name] for a boy? I can’t get figures on anything more than top 100 names where I live, so I don’t know if it is featuring in the girls names here. I’d like some global perspective if possible. [name]Do[/name] you consider it all boy, unisex or gone to the girls?

Thanks :slight_smile:

I think in [name]Oz[/name] NZ it’s all boy. In the US… alot of boy names are fair game.
Perhaps in years to come the trend ‘might’ make it go to the girls down under… like say [name]Morgan[/name] or [name]Shannon[/name].
BUT I think it’s a great name.
Another possibility: Go with [name]Finnian[/name]- surely nobody would name a girl that?

[name]Finnegan[/name] or [name]Finnian[/name] are other ways to get to [name]Finn[/name] and both flow well with [name]Theodore[/name]. Tho neither has the ley ending that maybe what you like.

I would count [name]Finley[/name] as unisex, but I don’t think that makes it unusable.

Good luck

I’m in the US, so I can’t comment on the perceptions or naming trends in NZ… but if you genuinely fear [name]Finn[/name] becoming too feminized, you could avoid the issue by just not using a nickname. [name]Just[/name] refer to your son as [name]Finlay[/name] (great name!) most of the time. It’s definitely masculine, and I can’t imagine it heading over to the girl’s camp any time soon. :slight_smile:

[name]Fintan[/name] is also another male Irish name with the [name]Fin[/name]- beginning. Been on my list a long time, that one…

I only know [name]Finn[/name] and [name]Finley[/name] as male names, I am a [name]Pom[/name] living in Australia with Irish heritage - [name]Finn[/name] McCool surely settles the argument! But then I only knew [name]Quinn[/name] as a surname until very recently.

Somebody else suggested [name]Finnegan[/name], and I really like that. Like, I really really like that. [name]Finnegan[/name] [name]Theodore[/name]. [name]Finn[/name]. [name]Egan[/name]. Yes.

My nephew’s name is [name]Fintan[/name] so I only think of the [name]Finn[/name]- names as boy names. Am in U.S.

I’m from the US and think that [name]Finlay[/name] is more boy than girl, but definitely wouldn’t be surprised to meet a little girl with the name. If someone told me they had a child named [name]Finlay[/name], I’d probably just ask, “Boy or girl?”–I wouldn’t make an assumption. (I find myself doing that with a lot of names these days.) Softer boys’ names like that just tend to be an easy grab for moms and dads with girls.

[name]Finlay[/name] [name]Theodore[/name] IS a fantastic name, and of course the fn/mn combination is clearly masculine, but if you’re looking for a fn lacking in gender ambiguity, [name]Finlay[/name] is not it (in the US anyway). I’m not sure how much that will matter, though, since you’re in NZ where the name is definitely all boy. [name]Do[/name] the trends jump from continent to continent at all? I wish I knew more so that I could advise you, but unfortunately I only know what’s going on where I am. I’m inclined to say that what’s going on where you are is what’s most important, but if you sense there may be a trend toward female Finlays where you are in the near future, that’s something you’d be wise to consider. These things happen so fast, it seems!

Oh, and thanks so much for realizing that a masculine middle name is not going to make your child’s gender clear in most situations! So many parents who say they don’t want gender ambiguity think, “I’ll use a really ambiguous fn, but clear up any confusion with the mn.” Unless you’re always going to call them by their fn AND mn, it’s not going to work–the name by which your child is known, a big part of his/her identity, is still ambiguous.

I like [name]Finn[/name] just as a name in itself :slight_smile:

I am in [name]Canada[/name] and [name]Finlay[/name] is all boy to me. I would be very surprised to meet a little girl named [name]Finley[/name]/[name]Finlay[/name].

I know two little girl Finleys ([name]Canada[/name]) but the [name]Finlay[/name] spelling is definitely masculine, and a (male) family name for me.

I would automatically ask boy or girl for a [name]Finlay[/name]; I live in the US. I think [name]Finbar[/name] is an name that won’t go over to unisex, and you still [name]Fin[/name].

I really love the name! It is all boy to me. If you are going to call him [name]Finn[/name], I would go with [name]Finn[/name] [name]Theodore[/name]. I do love [name]Finlay[/name], though.

I [name]LOVE[/name] [name]Finn[/name] [name]Theodore[/name] and [name]Finlay[/name] isn’t bad (although I prefer the [name]Finley[/name] spelling). I do think it’s a unisex name, although it feels a bit more masculine to me. Overall, I think it’s a very handsome name! I like it a lot.

Thanks everyone for your replies. I’m not really keen on any of the [name]Fin[/name] alternatives (mostly as they are 3 syllables) and I just think there is a better feel with the 2-3 syllable flow of [name]Finlay[/name] [name]Theodore[/name], as opposed to the longer options or even just using [name]Finn[/name] on it’s own. Chances are he would end up going by [name]Finn[/name] a lot of the time, but I like names that have the option of a full name and a nickname, so they have a bit of choice as they get older.

As far as the gender side of things go, here in NZ I would be very surprised to hear of a female [name]Finlay[/name] or [name]Finley[/name] and [name]Finn[/name] is definitely a boys name. But US trends find their way to us pretty quickly so I guess that is what has been driving my thinking. I know if my little [name]Finlay[/name] was to grow up and decide to head off to work in the UK he would fit in just fine, but what about everywhere else? I met a female [name]Finn[/name] from Australia last year, she would have been 11 years old I think. It wasn’t short for anything else, she was just [name]Finn[/name]. I’m guessing that is rare for Australia? I’m trying to choose a name that is going to have long term suitability and I know it’s hard to say what will happen in 10 or 15 years, but obviously if I was choosing a name like [name]Thomas[/name] or [name]Graham[/name] I would have the same concerns. I just don’t want to give my baby boy a name that my teenage boy is going to hate!

I love [name]Finlay[/name]. It’s all boy to me. Your combo is making me swoon. [name]Finlay[/name] [name]Theodore[/name] is ridiculously perfect.

Thanks indianruby :slight_smile: It took us SO long to find a name that we agreed on and that we both really liked. I just want to be sure I’m making the right choice for our son and not just choosing a name that I love - since he’s the one who has to live with it :slight_smile:

I did not think Girl when I heard it at all. I did have a co-worker with [name]Finley[/name] as her last name, so it is more surname to me. Nothing wrong with it at all and one of my current name crushes is [name]Finnegan[/name]/[name]Finn[/name] so I like it! I am in my 50’s and live mid west United States.

[name]Finley[/name]/[name]Finlay[/name] is a perfect boy’s name, nothing remotely feminine about it.

I think it’s fine. I really like it.