[name_m]Just[/name_m] curious if anyone has a child with more than 3 names? I would love your thoughts and opinions? What is too many? Does it matter?
This is our last little person and we of course have to keep his birth name, plus the name we love for him but can’t decide between 2 important family names. Is 4 names, plus a surname too much?
I’ve never met anyone with more than 3 middle names - I do know a family where their (5!) girls have names along the lines of [name_f]Adelaide[/name_f] (fn) [name_f]Melissa[/name_f] [name_u]Calypso[/name_u] [name_f]Rosemary[/name_f] Tomtom-[name_u]Berry[/name_u] (surname). This is just an example name, not close to their real ones, but I always felt that it was a bit too many. That being said, if this is the last and you really can’t decide then it’s not the end of the world. You could also consider combining the family names or uniting the names via meaning e.g. I have friends who wanted to honour their dads. [name_m]Robert[/name_m] means ‘bright fame’. [name_m]Patrick[/name_m] means ‘noble patrician’. So they used [name_m]Albert[/name_m] which means ‘noble bright’.
I personally think that even two middle names are two much but if you think it fits then you should give your baby as many middle names as you like!
I will say that some people make double middle names work but sometimes I feel like people only have 2 middle names because that’s what everyone else is doing, so they just throw random names in.
What I’m trying to say is, use how ever many middle names that you feel comfortable using.
I know a family with three daughters, each of who have a first name and three middles. I’ve always thought it was a little too much, although it works on them. They have a one syllable last name, and the names are all 1-2 syllables long, with the exception of one 3 syllable middle for one girl.
It feels a bit over the top to me, like you are naming a fictional prince or princess instead of a real person. Really though, I think it depends most on if you are okay with it.
I haven’t and wouldn’t give my kid more than 3 middle names, but my mother-in-law gave her youngest son a handful of names. Not even the poor kid knows how many names he has, nor what they all are! I myself know his legal first name and his first 3 middle names, then one other middle name (he goes by his 5th or so middle name). It’s a royal mess and, if I may be frank, it was downright stupid for her to saddle the kid with so many names. I’m not speaking towards you or anything, by that last comment, but I don’t agree with her reasoning for it and the torment he gets from people treating his name as a joke is something he has said he will never forgive her for. My [name_f]MIL[/name_f] decided that, since [name_m]BIL[/name_m] was an unexpected, later-in-life baby, that she would use every single name she liked…
My other [name_m]BIL[/name_m] has 1 first name and 3 middles. He hates it but hasn’t been able to afford the legal process of changing it yet. He has stated that his mother should have just picked out the 2 names she loved the most- a first and middle- and stuck with that. I feel bad for him that he can’t enjoy his name, but I guess it is what it is.
I’m not trying to project my family’s situation onto yours, but those are the comments of people who have sort of experienced what you are asking. Granted, those are only 2 people and I’m sure there are some out there who, because of culture or some other reason, have multiple middle names and adore it. Personally, I think that 1 is fairly standard (at least where I’m at) but 2 is sort of the max. At least, that’s what I’m comfortable with. Too many names is just too messy. I can appreciate that there are good reasons that some people have for choosing more than 2 middles, but I don’t know…at some point, it just feels like a laundry list rather than a name.
I like what someone else said about trying to combine the names or uniting them by a common meaning. Maybe you could just come up with another name that you both love, instead of having to choose between the family names. I think that the only one that has to be a given is the child’s birth name, especially if he is old enough to recognize it, unless it is dangerous to use. Work around that. I don’t mean to come off as cold-hearted, but names are often too much about the parents and, sometimes, not enough thought is put towards how the child will have to bear what we choose.
Thank you to everyone for sharing with such honesty. Your opinions really helped.