I don’t really like my actual name, so I am quite torn.
From the people I’ve known who’ve changed their names, it has often taken quite a lot of searching, trialling and changing before they’ve landed on the one that clicks. That probably isn’t very helpful, but just know that, while frustrating, I think not being able to find the name yet isn’t an uncommon problem!
Still, some more practical advice:
- Narrow down your criteria - what exactly do you want the name to be? [name_f]Do[/name_f] you want it to be neutral, leaning more fem or masc, wordy, familiar, unique, long, short, with nickname possibility, from a particular culture? Are there specific meanings you want? Particular sounds you like?
- Have a really good idea of who you are, in terms of your identity, interests, personality, aspirations etc. That might be tough when you’re still a teen, but having a firmer idea of their identity did seem to help the people I’ve known who’ve changed their names
*Keep trying and keep searching - not particularly inspiring advice, but hopefully in time, the right one will make itself known and feel right for you
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It’s not something I’ve personally experienced, but from what I’ve learned from friends who have changed their name and from my own experience trying to find the perfect name choices for future kids, you know when you know. Which is incredibly unhelpful, I know, but genuinely I think it will just slot into place when you come across (or perhaps revisit) the right name(s). I agree that to find a name that fits your identity well, you have to have a strong idea of your identity - which is hard when you’re younger, but maybe you could make some notes or a mind map of everything you like and value about yourself, and use the stuff that comes up as jumping off points to dig around nameberry and other sites?
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I socially changed my name in college.
I legally changed it to something else four years later. I couldn’t be happier with my name now.
It took time and trying on different names (luckily I had friends who were willing to honor this— if you don’t have support in your real life the Internet is a great place to test these names out too) until I found one that consistently felt like me.
[name_f]My[/name_f] partner is currently in the process of trying on new names as well. Their process is somewhat different than mine. There is no right or wrong way to do it.
At the end of the day, the name that feels the most like you is the right name of course, but you may be surprised— it may not be the name that you entered feeling like it would be. [name_u]Or[/name_u] it may! Only you can decide; that’s the beauty of it.
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That’s very interesting!
How did you socially change your name in college?
I don’t know if this is the case for you but I don’t think there is a real “best” name for a person. Since names are one of your hobbies it may be that you are being overly choosy. Its not a bad thing but don’t let it get you discouraged since there are plenty of great names out there and you don’t have to find the one needle in the haystack. Lots of shoes fit but most need a little breaking in 
Also names you like in the abstract aren’t necessarily all names you might consider for yourself, or kids, or pets, or whatever.
Maybe the name won’t claim you, you must claim it?
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I don’t think there is a one size fits all answer.
Some people like so many names and are easily pleased. Others look for years and can’t find anything.
I’ve been meaning to research conscious dreaming. You might look into that and seek your name in your dreams!
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