I am the mother of a nine year old girl who I adopted when she was 8 months old. At the time I was a single mother, and for the first 6 or so years of her life it was just the two of us.
Last year I got married, which was a change for my daughter, but she dealt with it really well. I am currently 21 weeks pregnant with a second little girl and am afraid it might be a bit adjustment for my daughter, having just got used to having an extra parent in the house.
I read on an earlier post about children with big gaps that most people advise getting the older child involved with caring for the new baby. I think this is a great idea, but I don’t want my daughter to feel like a ‘second mother’, I really want my girls to grow up feeling like sisters. I think I am especially concerened given that she is adopted, and the new baby will be my first biological child. Although this doesn’t bother me, and at the moment she is very comfortable with the situation, I wourry that when the new baby is here she might feel kind of ‘second best’.
So… now for the point of this post (sorry about the ramble), do you think it would be a good idea for me to involve her in the naming of the new baby? I’ve been thinking that it might be a nice way to get her involved and feeling positive about her new sister. If yes, should I let her choose the name entirley, or just have her help out and have her say about names I’m considering?
If anyone has been in a similar situation, or knows of someone who has, I would love some advice on how to make sure that things go as smoothly as possible.
I hope this all made sense! Thankyou for your help,