Please help talk me down from the ledge. We named our beautiful baby girl [name_f]Violet[/name_f] 8 months ago and all of a sudden I am having regrets about the popularity. I absolutely knew [name_f]Violet[/name_f] was a trending name when we named her and chose to ignore that because I didn’t want that to dictate our choices when it felt like The Name for us, and because popularity is a flukey thing (like my older kids have 3 Sophies and 3 Eleanors between their classes, but zero Olivias). We don’t know, and still haven’t met any other baby Violets in our circle and I have asked around with friends, and even our baby music teacher if she knew any and she said she only knew of one 4 year old. But lately I feel like I’m being inundated with various naming sites/ accounts telling me how [name_f]Violet[/name_f] is the next [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f] etc (e.g. nameberrys top names of 2035). I’ve always loved [name_f]Ruby[/name_f] but my husband wasn’t into it so it fell off the list. All of a sudden I’m feeling like it would have suited her and I should and could have pushed for it harder. Have mentioned this to my husband who is like um no we are clearly not changing her name at 8 months (and also he still doesn’t love Ruby). I still think [name_f]Violet[/name_f] is a beautiful name, but all this recent chatter is upsetting me so much more than I wish it would. I have always loved names and been excited to choose something special for my children and now I’m feeling like I didn’t. 
Name regret is often sympton of postpartum anxiety. I think you should talk to someone about this
Totally normal to second guess!
[name_f][/name_f]I’m going to pull a little data for you, hopefully some of it will be helpful:
[name_f][/name_f]In 2023, [name_f]Violet[/name_f] was the 16th most popular name. It was used for 6342 baby girls, which represents 0.363%[name_f][/name_f] of total female births in 2023.
[name_f]Ruby[/name_f] was the 66th most popular name in 2023. Used for 3333 baby girls, or 0.191%. So it is technically less popular but the difference, in the scheme of things, is marginal. For either name, there is a high chance of there being another Violet/Ruby in their school. But neither has a particularly high chance of having another in their class.
[name_f][/name_f]It’s interesting that you bring up the 2035 predictor. By then, your [name_f]Violet[/name_f] will be around 9/10 years old. Does it really matter if there are a bunch of newborn Violets while yours is in 4th grade? Really it just shows that you’re ahead of the trend!
[name_f][/name_f]You loved the name [name_f]Violet[/name_f], and have been using it. It’s special for her because you chose it with love and care!
[name_f]Violet[/name_f] is gorgeous. Don’t let statistics or predictions freak you out. You picked a name you both loved, and in practice, it hasn’t been as popular as you feared! You’re not meeting any. People you know aren’t inundated with Violets. I, personally, know no Violets, and I have three young children. I wish I did! It’s one of my favorite names.
[name_f][/name_f]Take a deep breath. You did a great job naming. Enjoy your sweet baby [name_f]Violet[/name_f].
[name_f]Violet[/name_f] is a beautiful name! I would try to focus on the parts of the name that made it stand out to you in spite of its popularity and not on the fact that some naming sites are predicting it to become popular.
Thank you 🩷 this is really helpful and exactly what I needed to hear
It is a funny thing! Our eldest’s name was somewhere in the 200s when we named her and now we know several! But names I steered away from for popularity like [name_f]Grace[/name_f] and [name_f]Lily[/name_f], we know none! This was what was going through my head deciding on [name_f]Violet[/name_f] and yet here I am. It definitely suits her though and I do get compliments all the time.
You’re fine. If you haven’t met other Violets, it’s the only name you both love, and Nameberry/similar sites online is the only indication you have that it’s about to get much more popular… I wouldn’t worry about it, it really seems like the good outweighs the bad here. The most popular names are getting less used every year anyway – [name_f]Violet[/name_f] may have been #16[name_f][/name_f] last year, but it was only given to about 1 in 300 baby girls.
[name_f]Violet[/name_f] is still special! You think it is beautiful, your husband thinks it is beautiful, and you liked it enough to give it to her. That in itself is special.
[name_f][/name_f]It might help to have some time away from popularity lists or sites that discuss names, especially because it doesn’t seem like those reflect where you are / your and your children’s social circle.
[name_f][/name_f]I also have had moments of name regret [name_f][/name_f]- when my grandfather died I really wished I had pushed to give my daughter a first name that felt more obviously connected to his name instead of a name my partner liked better [name_f][/name_f]- but watching her obviously recognize her name and respond to it has been helpful. Remembering that my partner deserves to have a voice in the naming as long as it is a name I also feel good about was helpful. Using a nickname I like to use with her was helpful. Maybe there are things that would be helpful to you in those moments of your regret.
I love [name_f]Violet[/name_f] [name_f][/name_f]! [name_f][/name_f] Names “change with the tide” sometimes – don’t let it upset you – you picked a
[name_f][/name_f]beautiful original name – and obviously have good taste [name_f][/name_f]!
[name_f][/name_f]I bet in 50-75 years the name [name_f]Karen[/name_f] will even be back ( I STILL think it’s lovely btw too) [name_f][/name_f] – names are funny sometimes and very unpredictable too sometimes
Vi0let is gorgeous!
[name_f][/name_f]Name regret is really normal and I think around this stage of your postpartum recovery your emotions are really normal. I had name regret regarding my daughter’s name. Her name is [name_f]Lilia[/name_f] and I felt so conflicted concerning her name. I felt that I made a terrible mistake the anxiety was overwhelming. The reasons why I doubted my decision was that [name_f]Lilia[/name_f] was constantly mispronounced and was seen as weird due to [name_f]Lily[/name_f] variants being rare (aside from the increase of Liliana) which made me doubt myself. But at the same time due to the increase of [name_f]Lily[/name_f] names her name seems to melt into the crowd. It was really odd conflicting thoughts and anxiety surrounding the decision I made. However as [name_f]Lilia[/name_f] grew she definitely grew into her name and I’m so happy that she’s [name_f]Lilia[/name_f]. The berries also helped massively with feeling confident with my decision making by encouraging me to make a pros and cons list surrounding the name. This list really helped as I realised the pros outweighed the cons. I think as I grew more confident as a mother, my postpartum hormones settled and she responded to her name I knew I chose the right one.
Oh mama, hugs! you didn’t make a mistake.
[name_f][/name_f]I wondered this too as we had some pretty unique names on our list, and ultimately went with a statistically very popular name. I worried that he wouldn’t feel like his name was special.
[name_f][/name_f]but as obvious as it sounds, you have to pick a name within a certain timeframe (9 months give or take) and at a certain time in your life. What I named my baby last year is probably not what I would have named him if I had him 2-3 years ago, and perhaps not what I would have chosen if I had him 2 years from now.
[name_f][/name_f]If your concern is that it will be the next [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f], (and fwiw I don’t think it will be) just know the diversity of names being used will likely only increase from here, and each name out there will become more and more uncommon as the years go on. I don’t believe in 5 years that even the #1[name_f][/name_f] names will share classrooms with another (that’s already starting to be/often is the case).
[name_f][/name_f]Be easy on yourself, and I promise you this feeling will not last forever!
So hard to agree on a name with a spouse. It’s great there was a name you both loved. Though I know it’s sad to say goodbye to the names we didn’t get to use.
Really really appreciate all these thoughtful and helpful responses. Also really helps to know I’m not alone or crazy in even having this thought. I also secretly tried to call her [name_f]Ruby[/name_f] in my head today just to see and can confirm- no. That is not her name.
I’m sorry the popularity of [name_f]Violet[/name_f] is distressing you so much more than you expected it would! [name_f][/name_f] [name_f]Violet[/name_f] is an absolutely beautiful name (one of my own favorites and has been for over a decade now), and I would happily have my own [name_f]Violet[/name_f]!
[name_f][/name_f]Since it sounds like your husband is not willing to budge on [name_f]Violet[/name_f] at this point, I would focus on the positives of the name! [name_f][/name_f] Like you said, you don’t know any Violets yet. [name_f][/name_f] Plus, popularity isn’t what it was when we were kids! [name_f][/name_f] There were 6,342 Violets born in the US last year (in comparison, this is almost a third of the number of babies given the name [name_f]Olivia[/name_f]! [name_f][/name_f] Once you get out of the top 5 or so, the number of babies given each name is much smaller). [name_f][/name_f] When you divide that between 50 states, that’s only about 127 Violets per state, and there are an average 170 school districts per state (this doesn’t include charter, private, home school, etc., which will obviously lower the [name_f]Violet[/name_f] percentage by at least a little!). [name_f][/name_f] With those numbers, on average there might not even be a [name_f]Violet[/name_f] in each grade, despite its popularity. [name_f][/name_f] Violet’s a beautiful name and has lots of nn variety, too! [name_f][/name_f] [name_f]Vivi[/name_f], [name_f]Lottie[/name_f], [name_f]Lettie[/name_f], [name_f]Vi[/name_f], [name_f]Lola[/name_f], you could even do [name_f]Viola[/name_f] or [name_f]Violetta[/name_f] as a diminutive if you find in the future that you’re coming across a lot of Violets?
[name_f][/name_f]I was born with the 2nd most popular name the year I was born & didn’t go to school with another [name_m]Ashley[/name_m] until I was a junior in high school (although I did go to a small private school) [name_f][/name_f]- so you never know! [name_f][/name_f] I wouldn’t let the outside noise keep you from a name you love… [name_f][/name_f] it’s nice to avoid the popularity, but clearly you’ve loved [name_f]Violet[/name_f]! [name_f][/name_f] Despite the popularity, [name_f]Violet[/name_f] is still so special and was caringly and lovingly chosen. [name_f][/name_f] The popularity of the name can’t take that from you! [name_f][/name_f] You set your baby up so well for success, mama. [name_f][/name_f] I don’t know her personality, but I was a painfully shy kid and loved having a name that was “popular” because it made me feel like I had camaraderie with a group of people even though I didn’t know any other Ashleys!
[name_f][/name_f]Good luck! [name_f][/name_f] 
We almost went with Violet for our 11 month old daughter, and the populariity on paper was a deterrent for me as well (not ultimately the deciding factor, but definitely bothered me).
But i actually have the opposite sentiment – i wonder if we should’ve gone with it 
Kids love having current names! It’s we parents who wanna give them something unique… and it’s not overpopular! It also strikes me as a name girls would want to have, and isn’t that the point? That they love their name? Other people like the same name as you because you did a good job! And the fact that your husband doesnt like Ruby is further confirmation you chose the right name 🩷
Honestly this was a big deciding factor for us too actually! I passed on a few names with my older kids because I thought they were “too popular” and now we never come across them! So I said I wasn’t going to let that deter me this time and now here I am 
But the comments here have been super helpful and I will say I think she looks like a [name_f]Violet[/name_f] through and through.
I’m not sure where [name_f]Violet[/name_f] currently falls on the charts, but I’ve yet to meet one in person or hear any being called at the local parks. I will say, [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f] is a classic name, but it feels much much more “trendy” to me than [name_f]Violet[/name_f] does. I know [name_f][/name_f] multiple little girl Charli’s and Charlottes, but I keep seeing variations of [name_f]Charlotte[/name_f], [name_m]Charlie[/name_m], [name_f]Charli[/name_f], Charliegh, [name_f]Charlee[/name_f]. Idk, it’s like everyone wanted the classic name but still wanted to be unique so they tried to put a spelling spin on it but it inadvertently made it look all the more trendy. If that makes sense? I don’t feel that way about [name_f]Violet[/name_f] and haven’t seen anything crazy try-hard with people using the name. I’ve just seen Violet/Violette. I know it’s gained popularity statistically, but it feels more rare than a lot of mother names to me. I know LOADS of little girls named [name_f]Everleigh[/name_f], [name_f]Everly[/name_f], [name_f]Emberly[/name_f], [name_f]Emberlynn[/name_f], etc., that statistically aren’t super popular, but they SOUND super common because there are million little variations of them that got trendy all of a sudden. If that makes sense? I’m distracted by a teething f baby, lol so not very coherent response. 