A troll is someone whose only purpose on a forum is to start arguments, it’s not an insult, they shouldn’t even be there to start with. I call out trolls to stop people wasting their time.
There are definitely some trolls but how do we ever really know for sure…I prefer to give the benefit of the doubt. It is most definitely an insult when it is not true. Example: someone can call me a “troll” now because they think I’m arguing when I’m really only trying to contribute to a discussion, and that would be insulting. The “arguments” they start may be viewed as decent discussions to have and not a waste of time in other people’s opinions.
You have over a hundred posts. I doubt anyone would call you a troll. O_o
I’ll reiterate that the original sentiment was that we’re all capable of being thoughtful, constructive and civil in the things we say on these boards, and I think that we should be, especially in regards to differences of style and taste.
About “ridiculous”: the issue I have with this word is that it stands in for actual criticism. It reminds me of when I’d be trying to engage a student (I used to teach English) in discussion about a book or something, and all he or she would say (be able to say?) is, “I dunno. It was just dumb.” There’s nowhere else the discussion can go when that is all a participant has to offer. That’s why it’s so frustrating to me in a space that’s supposed to be about discussion and sharing of ideas.
In regards to my use of “bullies”: As I noted in a previous post, it really bothers me when someone (often a new member, or at least a new forum participant) creates a thread in which she (or he?) asks for feedback about a name that is not one of the Nameberry faves, or that reflects a style that many Berries (myself included) might consider “down-market,” and the response to the post is derisive, non-constructive, judgmental, self-righteous and, frankly, reflective of elitist sentiments. I HATE anything that stinks of classism, and I feel an almost visceral anger when I see this kind of bullying/belittling. But in a way, you’re right, @scarletrune–maybe it’s no more my place to suggest that someone is a “bully” than it is anyone else’s to call something “ridiculous.”
However, in the body of my original post, I did something that many in the “ridiculous” camp have failed to do, over and over again–I’ve given a constructive and thoughtful explanation of what I mean when I use a particular label.
@poppy528: I don’t agree that civil = tepid.
I tend to take the “if you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything” approach.
I will tell someone I think one of their name choice is bad, but I will only do so if there is also a name on their list that I really like or love.
I have had a comment deleted by [name]Pam[/name] and [name]Linda[/name] before when I was in my junior member stage (I was rude about some ones already born child’s name). Since then even though I can’t stand names like [name]Beatrice[/name] I try not to respond to threads with names I don’t like, simply to avoid being rude. I think sometimes people don’t realise that saying something terrible about a name can affect the person. On Behind the Name terrible things were said about my name, I hated it and found nameberry lurked for about a year and have been pretty happy here.
A 100 or whatever arbitrary number selected doesn’t have to result in name-calling. [name]Just[/name] because one post frequently doesn’t mean that they give constructive criticism or further the discussion on a higher level. Often and visibility does not parallel significance.
Besides troll, I also am bothered by the “sock puppet” thing or just overall name-calling. [name]Just[/name] because you agree with a member who’s in the minority doesn’t signify that it’s a lesser opinion. I prefer to have the discussion be about the name than labeling the person making the comment.
Never wrong? Fantastic advice? Incredible taste? [name]Ever[/name]? Really?
Constructive criticism should first be constructive before critical.
Yes. Really.
Really. Not.
Exhibit B.
“Incredible taste” included a dated emo band from the 2000s as a former signature. Never wrong = inability to look within. You really shouldn’t tell anyone.
I assumed celianne was being a little facetious in her claim. No?
Got designer shades just/To hide your face and/You wear 'em around like/You’re cooler than me
Facetious? ME? Never!
Artificial, bogus, or dummy? Yes.
As a former English teacher myself, it’s amazing how close to high school some of the other posters on this site are. We should discuss literary criticism, summer reading lists (Is everyone reading Tao [name]Lin[/name]'s Taipei or is it just me?), YA lit vs. the canon, and other faculty lounge dish.
I’m also in Los [name]Angeles[/name].
I think names can be discussed without anyone negatively responding to a name. It’s human and everyone is different, but I think the correct response to a name you don’t appreciate is to say something like “That’s not my taste” or equivalent.
I agree that we all can get a little out of control with our opinions sometimes (I admittedly have ranted a few times). I tend to throw the naming rules out the window. I don’t see why there needs to be any “rules”. It’s common sense. I tend to disregard them and there is one in particular I disregard a lot. I am shaking my head in shame right now because I know this a long standing “rule” in the naming world (Conflicting emotions… I don’t like the made up rules but I feel the need to follow them…). I always break the “[name]Don[/name]'t choose names after celebrities” rule (Okay I’m 14…Maybe it’s my age…More conflicting emotions. But it’s not like I love the names [name]Miley[/name], Snoop [name]Lion[/name], or [name]Kesha[/name])
Enough with this shame. I am proud to say that i really love the name [name]Avril[/name]. I like that it’s french for [name]April[/name] and I just like it okay. There.
I seriously needed to “say” that and just doing it makes me feel better and that I don’t have to follow the rules.
That was incredibly confusing.
So long story short, I love the name [name]Avril[/name] and I don’t care about judgment. Also, I break a lot of the naming “rules” so oh well.