So, I think we all consider nicknames when naming our kids, but I’ve noticed that a lot of people (including myself) will dump a name if the obvious nickname isn’t in their taste or I’ve seen people (and done it myself) on here say “Oh I like that name, but not with that nick name so I voted something else!”
What’s the big deal with nicknames? Are they really THAT important in the “real world” or do Berries tend to overthink names and potential nicknames?
Are your children’s nicknames very obvious forms of their names!? And are they the ones you thought they would end up with when you chose the name/s?
[name]How[/name] do you stop people from using a nickname you don’t like!?
I don’t think you can really stop people from using certain nn. Like for me I never liked [name]Izzy[/name] as a nn…which is what I was called during my uni years. High school the nn used were [name]Belle[/name] & [name]Isa[/name], which is what my immediate family call me.
I named my son [name]Oscar[/name] even though I can’t stand the nn [name]Ozzie[/name]. No one has tried to call him that yet (we use Oscys or Osc) but he isn’t at school either.
My daughter [name]Nora[/name] is almost exclusively called [name]Ra[/name]-ra, which I never forsaw, but was simply how my young son pronounced her name when she was born.
I think you have to let go and embrace all elements of your child’s name. You can’t necessarily control the nn’s that may pop up throughout their lives.
I can only speak from my own experience here. But I’ve found nicknames are generally only automatic or semi-automatic if really obvious (think [name]Jen/name for [name]Jennifer[/name], [name]Matt[/name] for [name]Matthew[/name], [name]Dave[/name] for [name]David[/name]). [name]Even[/name] these- I know numerous Davids, [name]Matthews[/name], Katherines, etc. who go by their full names. They’ve never had people try to call them anything else. For anything less established- and even some obvious ones- e.g. [name]Abby[/name] for [name]Abigail[/name]- it’s only if the person specifically says they go by a nickname. Many people I know only go by a nickname with good friends, even if it’s obvious- e.g. [name]Jess[/name] for [name]Jessica[/name], Rach for [name]Rachel[/name]- but generally use their full name.
I find that with a name that has a really obvious nickname (e.g. [name]Dave[/name] for [name]David[/name]) people will ask whether they prefer the nickname or full name. Anything else, the person will initiate it for themselves (e.g. [name]Dana[/name] for [name]Daniela[/name]). My name’s [name]Lauren[/name] and a couple people have tried to call me Laur or Laur-Laur (personally can’t see how it sounds good at ALL). Most of them stopped after I reminded them a few times I don’t like it. Except one of my friends who gives pretty much everyone ridiculous nicknames for fun.
I can only think of a couple people off the top of my head who go exclusively by a nickname- [name]Ally[/name] for [name]Alexandra[/name], [name]Jan[/name] for [name]Janet[/name]. But I seem to know a lot of people with full names like [name]Annie[/name] and [name]Chris[/name].
Friends will probably shorten a name, but they aren’t used by parents, teachers or other kids. I have friends [name]Christine[/name] “[name]Chrissy[/name]”, [name]Caitlyn[/name] ‘[name]Catie[/name]’, [name]Autumn[/name] ‘Auddie’ and [name]Olivia[/name] ‘[name]Livvie[/name]’. These nicknames you have little control of.
But if a [name]Katherine[/name] wants to go by [name]Katherine[/name], no one will usually say, "Sorry, but [name]Katie[/name] is easier to say.’
However, I think the reason many Berries are hesitant about using a name with an obvious nickname they dislike is because the child may want to go by it. If parents who hate [name]Addy[/name] end up naming their daughter [name]Adeline[/name], there might be a problem in ten years when [name]Adeline[/name] wants to be called [name]Addy[/name]. Similar thing happened with my friend [name]Evelyn[/name], who almost goes exclusively by [name]Evie[/name] now. Her parents despised [name]Evie[/name] as a nickname, but they had no control over what their teenaged [name]Evelyn[/name] told people to call her.
What’s the big deal with nicknames? Are they really THAT important in the “real world” or do Berries tend to overthink names and potential nicknames?
I think we over think them a little. I know two Gillians (Well one spells it [name]Jillian[/name]) and they are only occasionally called [name]Jil[/name], we mostly call them by their full names. My best friends are [name]Allison[/name] and [name]Miranda[/name], Mir/[name]Randa[/name] and [name]Ally[/name]. But I mostly use [name]Allison[/name] and [name]Miranda[/name].
There are rarely people in my school that are actually just called their nickname. [name]Cate[/name] is a nickname for [name]Catelin[/name], and I’ve only ever gone by [name]Cate[/name]. Some of my classmates are actually very surprised when they realize my full name is [name]Catelin[/name]. No one has been able to come up with a nickname for it yet, though.
I think [name]Jake[/name] for [name]Jakob[/name] is almost inevitable though. I’ve known a [name]Jake[/name] for 10 years, and that’s all he’s ever gone by either.
Are your children’s nicknames very obvious forms of their names!? And are they the ones you thought they would end up with when you chose the name/s?
I don’t have kids, but I don’t think i’ll mind any nicknames. I will call them by certain things, but kids will be kids and there will eventually be names they will be called as they grow older and have more and more friends and social interactions.
[name]How[/name] do you stop people from using a nickname you don’t like!?
I think it’s almost impossible. You can mostly just tell family and your close friends which nicknames you prefer, but there is no guarantee they won’t call your child something else when your back is turned, but other kids will call your kids what they wish. And I’m sure when your kid is old enough to think about it, they themselves will be able to tell others what they prefer and what they don’t.
Honestly if you really care about the nickname, you are better off picking it out yourself and calling your child that from a very early age. My father in law was super immature about our first son’s name and went out of his way to mispronounce it all the time, then started coming up with these super lame nicknames. His nickname is [name]Ace[/name] and everybody calls him [name]Ace[/name] so we just ignored him and he finally stopped his ridiculousness. My son has a longer name that is authentic but extremely underused and my FIL had an obvious problem with it. Since everyone knows him by [name]Ace[/name] I really doubt anyone will try to call him other names now. [name]Ace[/name] truly fits him so well!
Personally, I think it’s worth considering the nicknames for the names you love. YOU might not nickname your kid that, but that wont stop your children’s future friends/class mates/co-workers to nickname him or her that. On the other hand, I don’t think that the nickname [name]Dick[/name] should stop you from naming your son [name]Richard[/name], if you love that name. Then you can nickname him [name]Rich[/name] from an early age, and the problem pretty much is solved.
[name]Say[/name] your son is named [name]Henry[/name], but you don’t like the nickname [name]Harry[/name]. Sure enough, you can tell friends and family to call him by his real name, and not [name]Harry[/name], but you can’t continue to do that throughout his life. You can’t stop him from wanting to be nicknamed [name]Harry[/name] either, perhaps he really like to be called [name]Harry[/name] by his friends, and you can’t really do much about it.
I admit I’m guilty of this in the sense that I love the name [name]Thomas[/name] but I am nowhere near as fond of the nickname[name]Tom[/name] or [name]Tommy[/name]
I don’t think I’ve ever scratched a name due to the nickname…
Nicknames don’t determine my like for names, or dislike. I’m big on nicknames, but not that big I guess. In the real world, nicknames aren’t that crucial. I work at a daycare and we’ve never called our [name]Alfred[/name] [name]Alfie[/name], or [name]Fred[/name], or [name]Freddie[/name], or [name]Eddie[/name]. [name]Just[/name] [name]Alfred[/name].
Sometimes I call one of our Johnathans “[name]John[/name]” but that’s mostly because he responds so quickly that I usually just get the “[name]John[/name]-” part out before he’s already looking at me and waiting for the rest of the sentence. He and I have bonded pretty well (he gets a serious kick out the fact that he ALWAYS beats me in Snakes&Ladders. -_- I still think he’s cheating some how.) so [name]John[/name] is now a nickname I actually call him by.
My co-workers never really called me by a nickname, though one of them does but it’s one she made up and isn’t a set nickname for my name.
With the kids I’ll ask them if they prefer a nickname or not. I work for a daycare that’s part of a chain, I’ve done supply at one of our sister sites. There they have a habit of calling the younger kids by nicknames, whereas my main one doesn’t really.
So I just asked the kids which they preferred. There they had a [name]Gabriella[/name] who they almost exclusively called [name]Gabby[/name], and she always responded well. However when I asked her which she preferred, [name]Gabby[/name] or [name]Gabriella[/name], she said [name]Gabriella[/name]. So I just called her that.
At my main daycare, in my main room we have a [name]Gabriela[/name] who’s totally neutral to [name]Gabriela[/name] or [name]Gabi[/name]. She doesn’t even care how we spell her name, and never bothered to correct us even thought it’s been written as [name]Gabriella[/name] since she’s been there. It’s supposed to be one L.
I think the best way to prevent a nickname is to introduce an alternate one, and nip it in the bud early. If someone calls your [name]Nathaniel[/name] “[name]Nathan[/name]” and you don’t like it, just say “Oh, we prefer [name]Nate[/name].”
I don’t know about this. I have mentioned it several times before but both my SO and his sister have longer names with very popular nn’s. (He doesn’t want his name posted but think [name]Mike[/name] for [name]Michael[/name] and [name]Alex[/name] for [name]Alexandra[/name]). Neither [name]EVER[/name] goes by a nn. Their parents insisted teachers did not allow it when they were little and since about 5th grade they have been correcting people themselves. My SO get’s really upset if you try to abbreviate his name. I prefer the longer version of his name as well - it’s a bit odd but his “Hey, I prefer [name]Michael[/name] over [name]Mike[/name]” line while giving a hand shake if someone just gives him a nn has just become part of his charm. So I think it’s doable. Maybe not super easy all the time but definitely doable. (Ironically both his parents shortened their names to the shortest possible nn’s. :))
I don’t think I’ve ever stricken a name because I didn’t like the nn - I think I’d just look for a different nn and plead the forums for help.
