[name_m]Hi[/name_m], I’m new here so sorry if I’m posting something wrong or something but I found this website on Google and I just have a quick question. I had a miscarriage a couple years ago and while we didn’t know the sex I felt like it was a girl, and so we decided to name her [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u] which I have always liked.
I am pregnant now and due soon. We have picked [name_f]Audrey[/name_f]. At first I wasn’t worried about that being weird but my mom and mother in law bought my husband and I a really sweet and really nice memorial frame and they have in memory of [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u] on it. I am now concerned that it may be strange to name my daughter [name_f]Audrey[/name_f].
If anyone has an opinion on this I would love to hear it.
I personally would not name another daughter [name_f]Audrey[/name_f], if I named her late sister [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u].
I want to say I am so sorry about your loss. We also lost a child to a miscarriage, prior to my son. Congratulations on expecting the new little one.
I want to add that my parents lost a child when she was 6 months old. If my parents had named me the same name or a name a letter off, I would have felt that they were not being fair to either of us. We are both individuals. Names are special and should be chosen with great care for each child. I would also feel odd if they said they were honoring her. I would wonder if I was a replacement. My parents very much did not want me to ever feel that way.
As to people using names they had already chosen. Those were much different times. They did not have baby name books, the internet, and did not travel the world as people do today. Parents are able to research to their hearts content for names for their children.
[name_f]Welcome[/name_f]!! First of all, I’m very sorry for the loss of your little one! It’s very sweet that you were able to give her a name that meant so much to you!
Now, I don’t really see an issue with naming your soon-to-be-due daughter [name_f]Audrey[/name_f]. They are separate names, albeit very similar. It actually used to be fairly common for parents who experienced child loss to bestow the same name of the child they lost to the next child they had of that same gender.
If it bothers you a great deal, would you maybe be open to using a variation of [name_f]Audrey[/name_f]? Maybe a similar name? Different spelling?
I think if you like it you should use it! But if it bothers you maybe something similar, yet different like @namergirl3 suggested? I’ll add [name_f]Audra[/name_f] to the list.
I think if you really like it use it, and if someone notices and questions it then a simple reply that [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] was named in honor of [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u] should suffice. It makes it seem special while the names are just different enough to be independent.
Thank you everyone for your advice esp namergirl3, I didn’t know that used to be a custom. Makes me feel a lot better, although I do like the name [name_f]Audriana[/name_f] I’ve never seen it before! I’ve never seen [name_f]Audra[/name_f] either and I like that one.
Again thank you everyone for your well wishes and opinions I feel very nice.
Lovemysweties sorry I didn’t see you added to your post before I made my last one. But that’s a good point. I will take this to my husband we don’t want our new baby to feel that way.
I should have said it when I first posted but I am not one for sharing too much personal/family stuff. I decided to add it because I felt it would be helpful to you.
BTW I adore my sisters full name. I hope I am able to honor her myself one day.
In my mind, it serves as tribute to [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u]. But if you find it weird to do so, others may also. I like both [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u] & [name_f]Audrey[/name_f].
I think we are going to research more names right now but keep [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] in the back of our minds. I feel attached to both names so it will be hard for me to find one I like as much but I don’t want to spend the rest of my life worried about it or have it be uncomfortable for my daughter. Thanks again everyone.
You could also use [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] or a similar name as a middle name if you’re worried they sound too similar. I don’t think anyone would bat an eye if your daughters name was [name_u]Rowan[/name_u] [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] or whatever first name you like. Then she’d still have her own first name but also have a link to [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u]. You could also just use [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u] as her middle name.
I would also suggest that you keep in mind that your daughter won’t share the experience of losing [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u] with you. While she may know the story of her name she doesn’t have the attachment to [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u] that you do. To some children that won’t matter but you also want to make sure that your daughter doesn’t grow up thinking that you are wishing she was her sister. And since [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u] and [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] sound similar she might feel that is enforced when you call her [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u] by accident.
I think it’s ok. [name_m]Even[/name_m] though you chose [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u] to remember your loss by, you never got the chance to really use the name. If you choose to stick with [name_f]Audrey[/name_f], just tell family that you know it’s very similar, but [name_f]Audrey[/name_f] just feels right and you’re so happy you get another chance to use it. [name_m]How[/name_m] can anyone argue with that?
I think it really depends on you! It is you and your partner who need to decide, and it’s not for the rest of us to decide what works for your family! Personally, I would say “[name_f]Audrey[/name_f]” and it would always remind me of [name_u]Aubrey[/name_u], so I wouldn’t do it. Maybe if you have another daughter after this one, you could think about [name_f]Audrey[/name_f], but for now, I would think it was too soon. However, if it’s the only name you both love, then I’d probably go ahead and use it.
As others said, so sorry for your loss, but welcome to nameberry!
[name_m]Hi[/name_m] everyone we decided we will name her [name_f]Faith[/name_f] which was going to be her middle name. We are still thinking of a new middle name if we give her one at all. Thank you all again for your help I think this will be much better!
Firstly, congratulations on your pregnancy and condolences for your previous loss. I don’t think it’s too much of a problem, though if you’re already thinking that it’s an issue it might be worth considering other names.
It could be nice to use the first initial A and the middle name ‘[name_f]Bree[/name_f]’ to honour her? [name_f]Aurora[/name_f] [name_f]Bree[/name_f], for example. Or even something along the lines of [name_u]Abilene[/name_u] [name_f]Rhiannon[/name_f], which would become ‘[name_m]Ab[/name_m]-Rhi’ which is close without being too close.