Rude reactions to pregnancy announcement. :(

I got a couple of rude reactions to my pregnancy announcement. [name_f]My[/name_f] grandmother asked in a rude angry tone if I am going to have 6. And this will be my 2nd and I’m married. And my [name_f]MIL[/name_f] just stared and said are you guys serious? Are you kidding me?
It really hurts my feelings that they’re just openly so rude. I don’t understand why. I’m married, we have a 18 month old, we pay our bills, we are not on welfare, I stay home to take care of the baby and husband works and goes to college. He just started a new career, we rarely ask the grandmas to babysit but they seem to be eager to.
I don’t know has this happened to you? I’m sorry I’m sure this has been discussed before. please don’t bug me grammar police lol.
thanks for reading

Wow family think that they have licence to say anything. I think both women need to bite their tongues and then be polite.

I imagine you were gobsmacked at their reaction I hope that they improve their manners.

Try not to take it to heart and even laugh at their comments, let it go because you don’t need to waste time thinking about that nonsense.

Good luck with everything and let us know if we can help with naming suggestions (we would love to).

rollo

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I’d be asking them what their problem is! But then, some people are just dicks.
Some people have been impolite to me too, there’ll be 17 months between my kids when this one gets here so it was pretty fast, but you can’t let people get you down.

Congratulations on your pregnancy! I hope others are kinder or at least smarter :slight_smile:

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Family certainly often think that, since they’re family, it’s acceptable for them to voice rude opinions (FYI, it’s not).

It sounds like these people were surprised by your news and didn’t have the tact to hide their immediate reactions. Typically, when people are surprised by pregnancy news and don’t react how you’d like, they will soon come around and get excited for the new baby. I would ignore their responses, inform them that you’re very excited and hope that they will share in your excitement, and leave it at that.

I’m unmarried, and I got some rude responses as well. The family members who made said comments did quickly come around.

I can’t imagine why your family is acting that way…I mean (and not to offend anybody out there), you are already married and seem to have your life together. It would be one thing if you were a 17 year old, or just got pregnant by somebody you didn’t hardly know. Your family should still support you, but I would understand their disappointment under less than ideal circumstances.

So, do your best to ignore it. Hopefully they’ll come around! Best of luck!

Tell them you are hoping for AT LEAST twelve. After all, everything is cheaper by the dozen!

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I’m sorry to hear they were so outspoken. [name_f]Do[/name_f] you think it has anything to do with the things you shared on the ‘mental health’ thread?

Yeah, yesterday when we broke the news to grandma she was happy, but still felt the need to say, “well you know I would have preferred if you waited until you have more money, but it will be okay I guess.”

I wanted to whack her. I’m 31, my son is 5, we’ve been married 10 years, are not on welfare, and this is our second and last child. If I wait any longer my ovaries are just going to deteriorate and my health will likely only get worse because of some genetic health issues I’m already coming up against.

So sorry to hear that your family was rude when you announced that you are pregnant. :frowning:

Congratulations on your soon to be here little one. Try not to let them get you down! :slight_smile:

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From what was posted on the mental health thread, I am guessing that they question your maturity, maybe also the amount of pressure that your situation must be putting on your husband & your finances. I would think being so young & not having a job or drivers’ license would be a red flag for a lot of people. Not that that is any excuse for being rude, but I can understand why maybe they would think you are not in a great position to be having more kids right now.

I re-read this and it looks mean. I’m sorry, that was not my intention.
What I mean to say is they are probably worried for you & your husband that you might be taking on more than you’re really ready for. Definitely not an excuse for them to be rude to you but I guess hearing something that could be a bit jarring for them they might have just given their knee-jerk reactions without thinking about sensitivity.

Good luck! It sounds like you have some REALLY hectic times ahead of you, hopefully you have some support & resources you can rely on.

It’s honestly never happened to me, as I married at 28… they had given up hope! lol However, I’m my parents’ 3rd (and last), and it did happen to them. In their case, my mom did have a lot of health problems during the pregnancy, and was offered an abortion for medical reasons. Luckily, they decided to keep me! [name_f]My[/name_f] dad’s parents did directly tell them that they were overpopulating the world, and I should be aborted (for reasons beyond the medical ones). Now, I’m their favourite… :slight_smile: [name_m]Just[/name_m] hang in there and brush it off. Some people have no tact, but luckily they will have very little affect on your future life. Your grandmother’s probably a bit on the elderly side, which also can affect things… sometimes they say things which are a bit strange… just love her anyhow, and let it roll off…

Yeah… [name_m]Don[/name_m]'t take it too personally is my advice. They’ll love the kid, but they probably just lack tact and are probably just worried for you.

That sucks. It would be nice to think family are 100% excited and supportive of the impending arrival of a new family member, but you can’t choose your family :frowning: It seems like a really unnecessary and harsh reaction given your circumstances.

I hope you have lots of lovely friends who can share your excitement and celebrate with you!

xx

I just told my family about my pregnancy yesterday and I got a few of the same reactions. Mainly it’s because my children will only be 12 months apart and I think my parents are more concerned than anything. The idea of having two kids so close in age kind of troubles them, but I’m like you. I told them I am married, I am independent, I’m financially stable and they have nothing to worry about. I just brush it off and attribute to the fact that, that’s just how some parents are.

I was quite young and unmarried when I had J. [name_f]My[/name_f] parents were not impressed, my siblings were not impressed and a lot of my friends were not impressed.

With A the family was stillunimpressed because I was still young and still unmarried. However, having seen how I am with J, they were a bit less unimpressed.

With this baby it doesn’t really anymore. I am still not married though will be married the first weekend of [name_u]June[/name_u] and this baby will likely be our last. [name_f]My[/name_f] grandma was actually thrilled that we are pregnant now. She is in love with both kids.

This is something I don’t get, everyone expects when they announce their pregnant that everyone is going to be happy. Maybe I’m flawed or something, but I don’t really care. I’m like “um, that’s great, but why do I care, it’s not my baby” now I don’t really say that, but that’s what I think. The truth is, not everyone is going to be happy and you just have to get over it. Sure they are rude since they spoke out loud, but some people just don’t have class.

That’s too bad. I’m sorry. As long as you and your husband are happy about it though, that’s all that really matters. Congratulations and best of luck!

Think about this: You have a job that you have dreamed about since you were a child, you have worked so hard and studied for years. You finally get the job and are so excited and tell your family and they say to you “[name_m]Don[/name_m]’t care, not my life”. [name_m]How[/name_m] would you feel? [name_m]Even[/name_m] if they didn’t care, it wouldn’t kill them to at least pretend to be happy for you. I think OP’s MIL’s reaction was rude and uncalled for.

I’ve been through this myself. It is really horrible and I’m so sorry they’ve reacted this way to your exciting news. Unfortunately, pregnancy and child rearing are areas where everyone seems to think their opinions should be announced, whether polite or just downright rude. I would make it clear to them that you and your husband are excited and that you don’t want to hear any negativity. You don’t need that when you’re pregnant.

Wishing you all the best and I hope you have good support from other family members and friends.

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