Seinfeld naming

General Name Discussion
1

I have been a long time Seinfeld fan, and this is part of a conversation from Seinfeld that, as a name fan, has always made me laugh. I’m sure this will resonate with many of you nameberries!

(background: [name]Elaine[/name] is dating someone named [name]Joel[/name] Rifkin, and because of the associations with the serial killer, he has decided to change his name…)

[name]ELAINE[/name]: Of course I support your decision to change your name.

[name]JOEL[/name]: After the Giant game I realized that this–this problem isn’t going away.

[name]ELAINE[/name]: Well, listen, I just want you to know that I was more than willing to stick it out with [name]Joel[/name] Rifkin.

[name]JOEL[/name]: Sure?

[name]ELAINE[/name]: (she fakes a strangling) RRR…

[name]JOEL[/name]: O.K. you got your list?

[name]ELAINE[/name]: Yeah. Yeah. 10 names.

[name]JOEL[/name]: Right.

[name]ELAINE[/name]: O.K. And if somebody objects, you can just veto it.

[name]JOEL[/name]: O.K.

[name]ELAINE[/name]: O.K. You start. What’s your first choice?

[name]JOEL[/name]: [name]Stuart[/name].

[name]ELAINE[/name]: (right away) No. Second choice.

[name]JOEL[/name]: [name]Stu[/name]–[name]Stuart[/name]'s no good?

[name]ELAINE[/name]: I’ve never met a normal guy named [name]Stuart[/name].

[name]JOEL[/name]: O-O.K. My second choice is… [name]Todd[/name].

[name]ELAINE[/name]: (repeating to hear how it sounds) [name]Todd[/name]. (pause) No. Veto.

[name]JOEL[/name]: All right. Oh, Hey, I think you’re gonna like my first my third choice.

[name]ELAINE[/name]: Great…

[name]JOEL[/name]: [name]Alex[/name].

[name]ELAINE[/name]: I gotta tell you, I have a bad association with the name [name]Alex[/name].

[name]JOEL[/name]: Bad bad association?

[name]ELAINE[/name]: Yeah, in college I sat next to an [name]Alex[/name] in art history. And he was always drinking coffee and after every sip he would go: “Ahh!”. I mean every two seconds: “Ahh!”. And he would take like 40 sips and after everyone: “Ahh!”. I had to drop the class.

(new scene)

[name]JOEL[/name]: [name]Ned[/name]?

[name]ELAINE[/name]: What is wrong with [name]Ned[/name]?

[name]JOEL[/name]: [name]Ned[/name]'s a guy who buys irregular underwear. Next!

[name]ELAINE[/name]: [name]Ellis[/name].

[name]JOEL[/name]: [name]Ellis[/name]?! You might as well go with [name]Alex[/name]. It’s the same thing!

[name]ELAINE[/name]: [name]Ellis[/name] and [name]Alex[/name] aren’t even close.

[name]JOEL[/name]: NEXT!

[name]ELAINE[/name]: Ohh, what is the point?

[name]JOEL[/name]: NO, NO. COME ON!

[name]ELAINE[/name]: O.K. O.K. [name]Remy[/name].

[name]JOEL[/name]: [name]Remy[/name] Rifkin? Should I get a beret?

[name]ELAINE[/name]: Oh, [name]Stuart[/name]'s a lot better! (talking like a baby) [name]Little[/name] [name]Stuart[/name] Rifkin likes to go shopping with his mother.

[name]JOEL[/name]: Grrrr!

needless to say, they break up :slight_smile:

2

I was just thinking about this episode a couple days ago but I didn’t start a topic on it. Very funny how they describe the imagery of each name. I often have similar reactions to some names, I just don’t share them!

3

[name]Page[/name], Your post is hilarious, because I was just thinking of that episode the other day, and I couldn’t remember the whole conversation between [name]Joel[/name] Rifkin and [name]Elaine[/name]! Very funny…

4

Hahahaha! That’s from the Seinfeld ep “The Masseuse.” Thanks, [name]Page[/name], for typing out all that!

Here’s a link to another scene from that ep:

“[name]Dion[/name] Rifkin. Wow! That is soooo cool!” (But, apparently, not as cool as “O.J. Rifkin.” Hahahahaha!)

Eerily, this episode aired only seven months before [name]Nicole[/name] [name]Brown[/name] [name]Simpson[/name] and [name]Ronald[/name] Goldman were murdered. And here in this episode we see [name]Elaine[/name] suggesting to her boyfriend that he change his name to “O.J.” to avoid having the same name as a killer ([name]Joel[/name] Rifkin). The poor shlub would have had to change his name again seven months later!

– [name]Nephele[/name]

5

i’m so glad you all enjoyed that! it’s so funny!

i must admit that i did not type it up though… there is a website called Seinfeld Scripts, and you can look up the scripts from any episode.

also interesting… Seinfeld characters names… there are some good ones!

[name]George[/name] [name]Louis[/name] Costanza
[name]Elaine[/name] [name]Marie[/name] [name]Benes[/name]
[name]Jerome[/name] ? Seinfeld
[name]Cosmo[/name] ? Kramer

i wish we could know what Kramer’s middle name is! i bet it’s great…

have a great day!

6

The show never revealed whether Kramer had a middle name. In fact, it took a long time before they even revealed that Kramer’s first name was [name]Cosmo[/name]! lol

Seinfeld’s character’s middle name is presumably the same as his own, since the character has the same first and last name as his and is based on him. So, that would be: [name]Jerome[/name] [name]Allen[/name] Seinfeld.

– [name]Nephele[/name]

7

HAHAHA!!! Thank you so much for this!!! I never saw that episode! Hysterical!

Thanks for the laugh! :slight_smile: