Expecting our second son in [name_u]February[/name_u] and my grandfather is facing terminal cancer. He was told 2 years at diagnosis, but it is progressing seemingly fast now and he is trying to manage so that he can meet his second great-grandson and likely the only great-grandchildren he’d ever have.
I would like to find a way to honour him in the middle name (personally where I think honour names should go and my partner feels similarly), but his name is in Chinese and wouldn’t translate well. When he immigrated, he came over with the name [name_m]Solomon[/name_m] as his adoptive father chose it from the Bible. He hasn’t really used that name since he came over. At work, his boss dubbed him “Little Joe” and “Joe” was what he went by for most of his working life. After he retired, he went back to using his Chinese name.
[name_m]Solomon[/name_m] and [name_u]Joe[/name_u] are the main jumping points for names, but we were trying to lengthen [name_u]Joe[/name_u] into something more formal. [name_f]My[/name_f] partner suggested [name_u]Joseph[/name_u], but I know that’s not the only choice out there but am having a hard time coming up with more.
Our older boy is [name_m]Roland[/name_m] [name_m]Paul[/name_m]. [name_m]Paul[/name_m] was my late father and grandpa was quite happy to hear his son’s name was living on and chose a Chinese name for our son that also shared a character with my late father.
Previously we were considering the middle name [name_u]Michael[/name_u], my partner’s (very much alive) father so that both our sons would have grandpa’s names and it would be even and fair.
Could you ask your grandfather, whether overtly or casually, what might be the closest version of his name in English. Or what name he would have chosen for himself? Or, how to spell his Chinese name in American letters (if it’s even possible) and use it for the middle name? Even if it doesn’t translate well so many people don’t even go by or use their middle name, it’s more representative, maybe you could still give that child his name. If not, maybe doesn’t hurt to have the conversation with him? He would still be surprised and honored even if it is before the baby’s birth, and that way he still has time to live with it awhile and enjoy the idea. So sorry for his prognosis.
[name_f]My[/name_f] suggestion is [name_m]Joachim[/name_m], which is a Hebrew name (the same as [name_m]Solomon[/name_m], [name_u]Michael[/name_u] and Joseph) containing the Jo-h of [name_u]Joseph[/name_u], o and m of [name_m]Solomon[/name_m], and M, i, c, h and a from [name_u]Michael[/name_u].
How does your partner feel about honouring your grandpa instead of his father?
It sounds like your grandpa’s Chinese heritage is what’s most important to him, rather than the names [name_m]Solomon[/name_m] or Joe… perhaps he could be involved in choosing a middle name that honours his Chinese heritage but DOES translate well? Though I know that could be tricky because then he might get hurt feelings if you don’t like any of the names he’s suggested. But for example a friend has the name [name_u]Fei[/name_u] for her daughter, as with [name_f]English[/name_f] [name_f]Faye[/name_f] it fits really well. Alternatively are their ways to honour him through his personality and interests, e.g. I know of a [name_m]Booker[/name_m] who’s grandfather was an author?
May you ask him for his Chinese name? I might help you better on this topic, if you needed a more specific advice upon it.
I am sure that you mean romanisation. Most romanisations of Chinese names sadly are not really the easiest to read and write for English or generally western pronounciations, so maybe it is better to ask for the meaning of characters and honour the meaning? Since in Chinese names, meanings are more important than sounds.
[name_u]Jonah[/name_u] came to mind - it means dove (Solomon means peace, doves symbolise peace) and could be a long form of [name_u]Joe[/name_u]?
Some other ideas:
Does his Chinese name have a meaning that could translate into a name you’d be comfortable using? Could you ask him to suggest a name, one that he’d like to see you use? Does he have interests/hobbies that could lead to a name? Is there something you associate with him or a memory of him that could inspire something? Would an initial name work - ie, sharing initials with him?
Am I understanding correctly that your grandpa chose a Chinese name for your first son? That’s a beautiful honor in itself, for him to get to choose a cultural name for his great-grandson. Could you ask him to choose a Chinese name for the new baby, too? If you could do that, I would honor your husband’s dad with the new baby’s middle name. It seems fair, and there’s still a lot of honor being paid to your beloved grandpa.
Maybe [name_m]Joel[/name_m] for “Joe?” There’s also [name_m]Josiah[/name_m], [name_m]Johann[/name_m], [name_m]Joah[/name_m], [name_u]Jordan[/name_u], [name_m]Jovan[/name_m]
A few combos for consideration:
[name_u]Rafe[/name_u] [name_u]Micah[/name_u] [name_m]Joel[/name_m] (this double middle shares parts of both [name_u]Michael[/name_u] and Joe)
[name_u]Micah[/name_u] [name_m]Joel[/name_m] (still honors both and [name_u]Micah[/name_u] is less directly a part of Michael)
[name_m]Reuben[/name_m] [name_u]Sol[/name_u] [name_u]Micah[/name_u] (parts of [name_m]Solomon[/name_m] and Michael)
[name_u]Henry[/name_u] [name_u]Solo[/name_u] [name_u]Michael[/name_u] (part of [name_m]Solomon[/name_m] and [name_u]Michael[/name_u] directly)
His Chinese name is “Yu Man” which sounds like “you man.” I asked my mom to ask him what the meaning is since the characters can often be written many ways and change the meaning and she came back with “scholar.” I guess great-grandpa might have considered that when he gave him [name_m]Solomon[/name_m] in immigration since it means “wise.” He’s named well cause despite not having more than a formal first grade education, he’s a fast learner and loved to learn different skills from tradesman just by watching.
I was trying to think of his interests and passions as well to broaden ideas. He loves to learn and watch animal/nature documentaries. He enjoys cooking and food (family trait, dad worked in meat sales and my brother and I are good home cooks). He takes pride in his handyman skills and admires my partner for his similar skill.
[name_f]My[/name_f] partner hasn’t said yes or no to honouring grandpa in the name, but he is receptive and open to it (perhaps hinging on what we picked). He wasn’t dead set on the idea of using his dad’s name, just said it would be nice. He prefers [name_m]Solomon[/name_m] over [name_u]Joseph[/name_u], though.
I am hoping he’ll also bestow a Chinese name for our second son, but he waited until birth to think of one (and apparently was up all night thinking after he was born). He also gave Chinese names to my brother and I as the family patriarch. He realizes that is his job, but I talked to him a bit last night and he says it’s going downhill daily (he also got confused and thought my son was a girl) so I don’t know if he could come up with one ahead of this one’s birth.
I’m so sorry for your family, and I hope you’re able to find a fitting way to honor your grandfather. There are so many suggestions already so I’ll try to be brief.
One thought is a name that eludes to his Chinese name in sound, like Newman or Manuel. Especially as a middle you could have wiggle room.
Another is, and I don’t know about Chinese names but, does he have a middle name? We gave my daughter my grandfather’s middle name (almost accidentally) and it’s been a great comfort since he passed.
Last thought is, I like your idea of honoring his interests. With the scholar meaning and his interests in learning, does he have a favorite author or literary character? That could be a great resource to explore. Also, there are a few names that mean scholar (Clark and Schuyler/Skylar). Truly anything that you associate with him could be a great honorific (favorite TV shows/characters, animal names, celebrity chef?).
I think you should use [name_m]Solomon[/name_m] over [name_u]Joseph[/name_u], it’s a distinctive and interesting choice. Maybe [name_u]Michael[/name_u] [name_m]Solomon[/name_m]?
I’m so sorry to hear what you’re going through, I know how tough cancer is.
[name_f]My[/name_f] first thought was [name_m]Joel[/name_m], as it contains [name_u]Joe[/name_u] but has the sound of [name_u]Sol[/name_u] from [name_m]Solomon[/name_m].
Is there a name that your great grandfather would have used if he had a son/ additional son? Maybe that could me a way to honour him.
What about [name_m]Saul[/name_m] as a middle name? [name_u]Or[/name_u] the Chinese name. If it’s a middle it’s less necessary to translate since it won’t be used every day.
[name_m]Truman[/name_m] sounds like his Chinese name. [name_m]Hugo[/name_m] shares some similar sounds to his Chinese name and I think also means wise/mind
[name_m]Joshua[/name_m] is nice too for a [name_u]Jo[/name_u]- name
[name_m]Solomon[/name_m] also has the meaning peace. [name_u]Shiloh[/name_u], [name_u]Axel[/name_u], [name_m]Frederick[/name_m], [name_u]Pax[/name_u], [name_u]Paxton[/name_u] also have peace in their meanings.
Dusting this off mostly so I can show the suggestions to my partner.
Unfortunately Grandpa passed away just over a week ago.
We were discussing names last night and we have a favourite first name that we have been sitting on for a while and it appears that we may go with it (we wait for birth to firm it up), but partner isn’t jiving with the names I have proposed for the middle. He likes [name_m]Solomon[/name_m] as a name, but feels like it doesn’t flow with the first name as it’s too long. Length and flow was also why he didn’t like using his own dad’s name in that position. He doesn’t like the shorter [name_m]Saul[/name_m] or [name_u]Sol[/name_u] that I suggested.
[name_f]My[/name_f] mom suggested using a character from grandpa’s name in this child’s Chinese name (we’ll have to ask around about names that we could make) so I think honouring might be covered but I would like to read him some names from this list in case anything jumps out.
