They said that's not a real name

My parents and sister came and visited us for mother’s day weekend. [name_u]Baby[/name_u] names came up and their response was not what I was hoping for. We have [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] picked out for a girl. My sister, who is my children’s godmother, said that [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] isn’t a real name. I know that she isn’t a fan of [name_f]Tess[/name_f], because she dislikes the story of [name_f]Tess[/name_f] of the d’Urbervilles By [name_m]Thomas[/name_m] [name_m]Hardy[/name_m]. I get it, but at the same time not everyone has a degree in English and has that association. Should we look for a more traditional middle name for [name_f]Tess[/name_f]? I am really trying to get DH on board with a classic (filler) middle name for our boy pick so I wonder if we should do the same with our girl name. The main issue is that both of our girls have 1 syllable middle names and since [name_f]Tess[/name_f] is only 1 syllable we can’t repeat that pattern. [name_f]Marigold[/name_f] is the other middle name we discussed for [name_f]Tess[/name_f] but it feels choppy to me and isn’t classic either. Am I over-reacting? [name_f]Do[/name_f] you have any classic middle name suggestions for [name_f]Tess[/name_f]?

I think [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is just about perfect, so I’m sorry to hear your sister had that reaction! I know three [name_f]Tess[/name_f]'s (of various ages) - One is short for [name_f]Therese[/name_f], the other short for [name_f]Tessa[/name_f] and the last is just [name_f]Tess[/name_f]. So it’s a bummer that is her only association with the name. If your sister doesn’t like [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] I don’t see her liking [name_f]Marigold[/name_f] either, for the same reason. Honestly, I think the middle name is used so infrequently that it doesn’t matter if it is traditional or not. Stick with what you love, especially since it seems the middle name won’t change her mind on the first name anyway.

[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is a great name! [name_m]Don[/name_m]'t listen to your sister.

Choose what YOU love! [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is gorgeous, interesting, earthy, spunky, lilting, and delightful! There are lots of ways to define ‘classic’! And fwiw, I, too, am an English teacher and I [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] the name [name_f]Tess[/name_f] and the novel and the movie, too. Let your sister name her own children. (Besides, in the scheme of the world, there’d be no stories to tell if only good, expected things happened to people, right?)

I also think [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is perfect. If [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] were not a real name, it would not even be in the top 1000. There are tons of flower/nature/word names. I think [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] flows a tad more smoothly than [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Marigold[/name_f], though now that I typed it, I love that too! I don’t see [name_f]Marigold[/name_f] any more of a real name than [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] though.

As for [name_f]Tess[/name_f], your sister will soon have a new association for the name that will far outshine her previous association. So I wouldn’t worry about that. My advice is to go with your gut, no one else’s… but if it’s really important for you that your family support the name, you could switch up the middle to something a bit more familiar and/or less noun-y…

[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Rosalie[/name_f] (I know [name_f]Rosalie[/name_f] was a top contender)
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Madeline[/name_f]
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Penelope[/name_f]
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Evangeline[/name_f]
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Cordelia[/name_f]
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Eleanor[/name_f]
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Louisa[/name_f]
?

[name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] “Noley” is the name of a character in the novel Show Boat by [name_f]Edna[/name_f] Ferber. This novel was made into a popular stage musical and movie musical. [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is certainly a beautiful and authentic name. :slight_smile:

We were just so happy with [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] and she sort of rained on our baby love parade. We’re very close so I do value her opinion but I doubt that we can find another combo we love as much because it took a long time to get here. Thanks for the reassurance. My mom loves [name_f]Tess[/name_f] but I didn’t get a chance to hear her thoughts on [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f], but her motto always is that once we have the baby that will be the baby’s name so she will love it.

Oh, gosh I’m sorry. It really isn’t fun when someone stomps all over a name you’ve fallen in love with. [name_m]Even[/name_m] the tamest of negative comments can leave a lasting impression. Honestly, I would just ignore what she had to say. [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is absolutely gorgeous. [name_m]Just[/name_m] remember how happy you were when you settled on the name and how much you and your DH love the name.

Such a shame when people don’t keep their opinions to themselves. If it was a valid point, sure, but that’s purely her opinion that it’s not a real name.

For what it’s worth I [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f]. I’d love to wear the name and I’m sure your daughter will love it too.

[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is absolutely gorgeous and perfect, I hope your sister’s opinion doesn’t keep you from using it.

I knew an older woman whose first name was [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f], so it actually is a name. I try and stay away from criticisms of anyone else’s name choice, because I remember how hurt I was when my mother told me she hated [name_f]Margot[/name_f], the name I’d chosen for my daughter. I ignored her and am so glad I did! Once the baby is born, their name suits them and negative associations go away. So stick with what you love, because you as parents and your daughter are the only really important people to consider.

[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] sounds lovely with her sisters. I have to disagree that it’s not a name. If that were the case all other flower and nature names shouldn’t be names either, but [name_f]Rose[/name_f] and [name_f]Lily[/name_f] are very popular in all of their forms. I wouldn’t change it if the two of you love it.

This is why I don’t like sharing my name choices with family. Someone always has a complaint. [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is perfection. And once baby is here, everyone will be too excited to care.

[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is gorgeous! Its pretty and unique! It is a real name, just not an overused one! It has a beautiful nature reference to those lovely trees, so it fits in yet feels special next to names like [name_f]Willow[/name_f]. Plus, its the middle name, your chance to picture something you love that you wouldn’t use as a first. So I say, avoid the classic fillers and go for it! By the way, I also love [name_f]Marigold[/name_f], its one of my own favorites.

[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is lovely. [name_m]Don[/name_m]'t let friends sway your decision. With my [name_f]Clara[/name_f], we only got positive feedback from one (one!) family member. And only a few I like that’s from friends or acquaintances. After she was born, we got much more positive responses after they put the name to a sweet baby. So I say, stick with what you love. Suggestions that I think you should ignore:

[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Lillian[/name_f]
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Amelia[/name_f]
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Eloise[/name_f]
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Genevieve[/name_f]
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Margaret[/name_f]
[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Gwendolyn[/name_f]

[name_m]How[/name_m] about.[name_f]Margaret[/name_f] or [name_f]Caroline[/name_f]?

[name_m]How[/name_m] is [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] not a real name?? In any case, as a mn, it hardly matters. Disregard your sister (though she’s got a point re: [name_f]Tess[/name_f]), and go with what you like. As to [name_f]Tess[/name_f]…if you really love it, keep it, but I’d at least consider more formal options w/that nn. If I had the issue: [name_f]Marie[/name_f]-[name_f]Therese[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f], nn [name_f]Tess[/name_f].

[name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is a winning combo, and will be charming on your daughter. It’s true, once she’s here the name will grow on everyone, and they’ll learn to love it.

My mother told me only after about a year that she wasn’t very excited about our name choice with our oldest (she said it’s actually a name she never really liked,) but now, so many years later, she can’t imagine our daughter with any other name - it suits her perfectly :slight_smile:

I agree you should use what you love. FWIW, if you did want to go w/more of the same syllable-feel of your first two, [name_f]Teresa[/name_f] (Teh-[name_u]RAY[/name_u]-sah) [name_f]May[/name_f] nn [name_f]Tess[/name_f] provides the longer fn/one-syllable mn, still w/the nn [name_f]Tess[/name_f] to use all the time. Good luck! :slight_smile:

I think [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Magnolia[/name_f] is beautiful and use it if you love it. If you do want a classic filler name, I would suggest [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Margaret[/name_f] or [name_f]Tess[/name_f] [name_f]Alexandria[/name_f].

Best of luck, [name_f]Lauren[/name_f]