To NN, or not?? Please help!

[name]Hi[/name] Again,
Hubby and I are still working on our top girl name. I thought we had decided this issue, but one of us (me!) is having doubts again. Is [name]Margo[/name] a nick name or a stand-alone name?? I’m just not sure. (For example, [name]Megan[/name] is a diminutive of [name]Margaret[/name], but I think of [name]Megan[/name] as a stand-alone name.) We are still discussing if we should use [name]Margaret[/name], nn [name]Margo[/name], or just plain [name]Margo[/name]. Complicating things is our son’s name; [name]Harold[/name], nn [name]Hal[/name]. We always intended to call him ‘[name]Hal[/name]’ but we thought ‘[name]Harold[/name]’ would look much more professional on a job resume one day. I tend to think [name]Margo[/name] would sound just fine on top of a resume. I also think [name]Margo[/name] sounds like a name that would work for both a young child and a grown woman.

I would really love to hear from people who are living this situation. [name]Do[/name] you like your nn/full name, or do you wish you had been given your nn as your full name?

Another thing I’m worried about, [name]Margaret[/name] has a huge list of possible nns, and I only want her called [name]Margo[/name], so this is a negative to me. I will never forget a girl I grew up with. Her name was [name]Katherine[/name], but her parents called her [name]Katie[/name]. I knew her for 10 years as [name]Katie[/name], and then, all of a sudden, she decides to go by [name]Kate[/name]. It was soooo awful. I would bump into her and she would ‘correct’ me on her name. Then, after a few years as a [name]Kate[/name], she decided to go by her full name, [name]Katherine[/name]. It got to where I never said her name when I would bump into her randomly, because I was afraid of insulting her by accidentally calling her the wrong name. I’m terrified of my children going through something like that. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks!

If you go with [name]Bertrice[/name] or [name]Josephine[/name], I prefer [name]Margo[/name]. [name]Margo[/name] is fresher, gives more zip to stately [name]Josephine[/name] and contrast to [name]Bertrice[/name]. [name]Margaret[/name] [name]Bertrice[/name] is a bit heavy on the Rs and Ts. [name]Margo[/name] [name]Bertrice[/name] is personal and clean and beautiful.

If you go with [name]Margaret[/name] (I have grown to love [name]Margaret[/name], but it’s not the freshest name on the block) I think your best mn option is [name]Viola[/name].
[name]Margaret[/name] [name]Viola[/name] is lovely. [name]Viola[/name] gives [name]Margaret[/name] some sparkle.

Yes [name]Margo[/name] can be a standalone name. I go almost exclusively by my nickname, [name]Emma[/name], but I enjoy having a longer formal name in my back pocket. If this is important to you, then go with [name]Margaret[/name]. [name]Margo[/name] and [name]Harold[/name] is a pretty sweet sibset though. You could always give her the nickname of M. “em.” That’s what I may do if I have an M-named daughter. Feels kind of [name]Fritz[/name] Lang to me :-b

My name is [name]Kylene[/name], nn [name]Kylie[/name]. I have exclusively used [name]Kylie[/name] and wish my parents would have named me that. I don’t find [name]Kylie[/name] any less professional than [name]Kylene[/name]. I wish it hasn’t skyrocketed up the charts in my 20s but I didn’t grow up with many [name]Kylie[/name]'s at least.

With our first 2 girls we sought names without nicknames. We caved with the third to use my husbands all time favorite name [name]Elizabeth[/name] whom we call [name]Eliza[/name]. After an impasse between two other names. After our aversions to nicknames with the first two it was a little odd to get used to the logistics of a nickname and now and nearly 2 few people realize she is actually an [name]Elizabeth[/name]. All that to say I think [name]Margo[/name] can stand alone just fine and that’s the direction I would go.

[name]Hi[/name] there! I’m a [name]Katherine[/name] like your offend-able friend and I go by [name]Kate[/name]. I have always wished my parents just named me [name]Kate[/name]. [name]Kate[/name] is perfectly acceptable on a resume and I recently started my professional career and decided to go with [name]Kate[/name] on the resume so that the first conversation I had with people during my interview wasn’t, “[name]Hi[/name] [name]Katherine[/name].” “Oh, please call me [name]Kate[/name].” I have no identity in the name [name]Katherine[/name]. I didn’t like correcting people. I would just go with [name]Margo[/name]! It’s a standalone for sure. I love the name [name]Margaret[/name] so I’m a bit sad to tell you not to use it, but [name]Margo[/name] is perfectly fine if that’s what you plan to call her.

I think that [name]Margo[/name] manages to be youthful & fresh AND professional & dignified. I agree that you could enforce [name]Margo[/name] for [name]Margaret[/name] for only so long. She could decide to become a [name]Maggie[/name] or go by her full. You might have to correct people repeatedly even during her childhood. Naming her [name]Margo[/name] solves that problem.

@emmabobemma-Wow! Thanks so much. Very helpful, especially with our mn references. I appreciate the distinction of mns, depending on which one we decide to use.
@kjhall- Thanks for sharing. I sort of think I would feel the same way if I had a nn/full name myself.
@sparrowfinch- I love the name [name]Kate[/name]. I agree that [name]Kate[/name] is professional sounding and can stand alone. Thanks for sharing your feelings on your name. I appreciate it and our daughter will reap the benefits!
@taz- Yes, I’m leaning that way too. I appreciate your response.

Personally, I think that if you want her to be exclusively called [name]Margo[/name], you should use [name]Margo[/name]. You can only control nicknames for so long, and since there are so many possibilities for [name]Margaret[/name], it will ultimately be her choice to decide which one she prefers. I’m a [name]Margaret[/name] myself, and I rejected ANY nicknames for ages and refused to answer to Marg, [name]Margie[/name], or [name]Marge[/name]. I never got [name]Margo[/name], except from a childhood friend’s dad who used to call me [name]Margot[/name] Fonteyn, which I still think is cute). Then at 19, I decided to go by [name]Maggie[/name]. (Although unlike your friend [name]Katie[/name]/[name]Kate[/name]/[name]Katherine[/name], I care if my old friends still call me [name]Margaret[/name]; life’s too short to get annoyed by these little things!)

FWIW, I don’t think [name]Margo[/name] sounds unprofessional name at all, and it’s less common than [name]Margaret[/name]. I’ve only known one [name]Margaux[/name], and she’s my step-cousin, although in truth I also know very few Margarets that are my age and none under the age of 25. I do prefer the spelling [name]Margot[/name] or [name]Margaux[/name], though there’s certainly nothing wrong with [name]Margo[/name].

[name]Margo[/name] stands alone just fine, and works for a child or adult. If [name]Margo[/name] is the name you love, just go with [name]Margo[/name]. :slight_smile:

I would go with just [name]Margo[/name], you can’t control what nickname she goes by forever if you go with [name]Margaret[/name]. [name]Margo[/name] is great ona child but works just as well on a professional woman and is a stand alone name in my opinion.

Yes, [name]Margo[/name] is a great stand-alone name. If that’s what you love, go with it.

I’ve never heard of someone being really upset by someone using different nn’s as they age, seems like a relatively normal thing to me. But if you only ever call her [name]Margo[/name], unless she’s really free-spirited and wants to branch out I doubt she’ll ever use anything else.

But honestly, I think going by a new nickname is probably one of the safest and healthiest forms of rebellion. It allows you to spread your wings, make choices/control your life, try out new ‘personalities’ without covering yourself in tattoo or piercings. [name]Just[/name] my two cents.

I actually don’t think [name]Kate[/name] is as respectable as [name]Katherine[/name] on a resume. [name]Katherine[/name] (whatever spelling) just seems more polished, put together, and educated. I do know several [name]Kate[/name] who are actually [name]Kathleen[/name] or [name]Caitlin[/name] though. In my family we tend to be name snobs. We were discussing girls named [name]Sam[/name]. My cousins could not get through their thick skulls that anyone would just name a girl [name]Sam[/name] not [name]Samantha[/name].

Anyway I like [name]Margaret[/name]. I do think [name]Margo[/name] works as a standalone. I would prefer [name]Margo[/name] (in this case) as a nickname. I think goes better with [name]Harold[/name] nn [name]Hal[/name]. I like that [name]Margaret[/name] gives her more options. I know several Margarets myself and they like their name. I think is a part of your classic theme. [name]Margo[/name] seems more now and [name]Margaret[/name] is more timeless.

It may be annoying to you to remember what your friend [name]Katharine[/name] nn [name]Katie[/name] nn [name]Kate[/name] did, but from her prospective she probably liked being able to change. I think [name]Katie[/name] the originally choice of her parents seems sort of babyish she wanted to get out from under that, so she went by [name]Kate[/name] which seems more grown up and is still similar. Then as she advanced maybe in her career she realized [name]Katharine[/name] was more in-line with what she was going for. (Also maybe she felt [name]Kate[/name] was still to close to [name]Katie[/name])

I know several members of my family who have multiple names enjoy the options. They have one for work and one for family and friends, etc.
Good [name]Luck[/name]!

Ok sorry one more thing.

The main reason many people are telling you to name her [name]Margo[/name] is you can’t control your child.
um, you can’t control child. She could decide at twenty that her should [name]Shelby[/name] (or something equally and change it to that.
I am sorry wanting to control your “child” (who eventually will be an adult and even a senior citizen) is not a good reason to pick a name (See my earlier commentary on your friend [name]Katie[/name]).

Also maybe she decide to be [name]Maggie[/name] after she walks into class and there is already a [name]Margo[/name].
Also worth mentioning my cousins got nicknames from their parents which they still go by (in their twenties) and rarely use their formal names (only for situations where they have to). For example one is [name]Meg[/name] real name [name]Margaret[/name].

I think [name]Margo[/name] (and its other spellings) are recognized variants, not just nicknames, of [name]Margaret[/name]. Sort of like [name]Juliette[/name] is the French variant of [name]Juliet[/name]–not a NN, just an international different form. (BTW, [name]Margo[/name] and [name]Hal[/name] are adorable together!) I think it comes down to what you really want, but I have absolutely no qualms about using [name]Margo[/name] on its own, and I have qualms about using many short forms on their own! I think the only two actual nns I don’t mind using on their own are [name]Jack[/name] and [name]Tess[/name] (it’s a very short list!). :slight_smile:

That being said, I think a lot of that comes from my experience with my own name. Who doesn’t want options? :slight_smile: I’m [name]Ashley[/name], and I’m fine being [name]Ashley[/name], it suits me, I like the associations with it (okay, not the full-of-herself, stuck-up cheerleader association a lot of people have, but I love that it means “ash tree meadow” and I love the connection to [name]George[/name] Mueller’s orphanage, [name]Ashley[/name] Downs…), I think it’s lovely. That being said, I hate that I’m always [name]Ashley[/name]. And while I love that occasionally (probably about a third of the time) I get [name]Ash[/name] now, it doesn’t really feel like a nn, it just feels like they couldn’t be bothered to say one more syllable. (At the same time, though, I love that people feel that they know me well enough to try and use a nn for me. Nicknames are special, I think. I find them intriguing and affectionate and full of love, probably because I never had one, haha.) Apparently, I’m quite confused about my own nn. But most of the names on my list are longer with the opportunity for a nn, because I want my children to feel like they can have a nn if they want, and hopefully, they’ll feel like they can go by whatever they want, they don’t have to stick to the nn that I liked. I think just [name]Margo[/name] is great, though, unless you actually prefer [name]Margaret[/name] (or even [name]Marguerite[/name], nn [name]Margo[/name]), I would definitely use it. I don’t think there’s really anything to worry about, [name]Margo[/name] works great on its own. :slight_smile:

I agree with you @kala_way. However, it is very challenging to remember that a person you have known for so long as ‘[name]Katie[/name]’ is now ‘[name]Kate[/name].’ It is simply a knee-jerk reaction when you see someone again after a long absence to hug their neck and say, “HEY [name]Katie[/name]!!” To then be met with, “I go by [name]Kate[/name] now” is just so, IDK, awkward?. I guess it just sets a tone and it can be hard to recover from that during a brief encounter. Not judging, just saying. Of course she has every right to change her to name to whatever she wants it to be, I just don’t want my children doing that, if I can help it. :slight_smile: There was a time in my life when I was affectionately nicknamed Smiley. And I LOVED it, but it was never my new name, it was a nn reserved for a close few to use, and like a lot of nns, I outgrew it and moved on. This is what I would prefer for my children, a nn that isn’t related to their actual name, so they can try it on and then discard later if they want to. That would be nicer to me than them trying to change their name name. [name]Hope[/name] that makes sense.

Thanks Berries! It sounds like most of you agree that [name]Margo[/name] can stand alone and doesn’t have to be a nn. Now, what about big brother [name]Harold[/name], nn [name]Hal[/name]? I feel great about [name]Harold[/name] and [name]Margaret[/name] together, as well as [name]Hal[/name] and [name]Margo[/name]…but what about [name]Harold[/name] and [name]Margo[/name] together??? Is that bothering anyone else other than my mother?? :slight_smile: I know that combination wouldn’t be used together often, but, for those times that demand formality, what do you think? (My mother clearly thinks [name]Harold[/name] and [name]Margo[/name] do not sound good together!) I just need to get a bigger picture for myself. Thanks!

I think they are both beautiful options. If you’re planning on only ever calling her [name]Margo[/name], then just name her [name]Margo[/name]. However, [name]Margaret[/name] is a wonderful option as well! You really can’t go wrong!

I actually think [name]Harold[/name] and [name]Margo[/name] go beautifully. They both have A,R,O in them and they both have a sort of 60’s vintage vibe to me–like they’d be best friends with the [name]Brady[/name] Bunch, lol.

Stick to your guns!

[name]Margo[/name] can totally stand alone. I’ve only known 1 [name]Margo[/name], and it was her full name. Personally, I would go with [name]Margaret[/name] because it’s one name I love pretty much all the nicknames for, but clearly you don’t so go with [name]Margo[/name].