We are about to have 5 under 5 (well really 5 under 4) which is nuts I am pretty sure but we do plan to either adopt or have 3 more. [name_f]My[/name_f] girls all have the same mother and were just over 13 months apart. So at the birth of the twin I will have 2 newborns and girls that are about 46 months old 32 months old and 19 months. At the point the babies will be born the girls will have been in our family for 16 months. So how long should we wait to add?
I am 1 of 2 and we were 13 years apart and have never been close. Partner is 1 of 3 and 2 get along great the other is the outsider and they were about 2.5 years apart.
There was another thread about this recently, and I don’t think there is one right answer. Any spacing can work.
The WHO recommends 3 to 5 years between babies (if you are the one having the babies) for optimal maternal and infant health. If you are comfortable with controlling the spacing of your biological children, I would wait at least that long to get pregnant again. Especially after twins (though my sister in law had a perfectly healthy singleton a year to the day after she had twins, it can be done, of course.)
I think most adoption agencies want your newest child to have been in your home a minimum of six months before adopting again. Some are more conservative and say 18 months. I tend to lean towards 18 months, though of course, this really depends on your personal situation. And of course, children just arrive sometimes and you can’t really say no. We adopted our son and while we are not applying again right now, we would never turn down a child someone asked us to adopt, either. Does that make sense?
Anyhow, I don’t think this is something you can mess up- it’s more about what keeps things the most sane for you as the parents and for your kids.
I think there a lot of factors that go into it. [name_f]My[/name_f] mom has a friend who had 5 girls (all singletons) in 7 years and she birthed them all! I was always just exhausted thinking of that! I am hoping to be 28/29 (currently just shy of 27) when I have my first, hoping for 3-4 kids, and want them about 2 years apart. If I were starting younger I would say 3 years apart, but I want to be done by the time I’m 35 so that limits the space inbetween.
Hubby & I agreed on 2-2.5 years in between and so far, we’ve done well with that. #1 and #2 are almost 27 months apart and if #3 comes on his/her [name_m]EDD[/name_m], 2 and 3 will 31 months apart. It’s really up to you & your partner and how much you think you can handle at one time. For me, I want to get all my diapering done back-to-back and to be done with pregnancy by age 30 (I’ll be 27 when #3 arrives).
[name_m]Hi[/name_m],
I’m kinda an even number type of person. I think 2 or 4 children are ideal so that one is not left out and there is always someone to be friends with. We currently have 2 girls 2.4 yrs apart. and might be getting number 3 soon. the next baby will be 3.5 years from my second daughter. I would like number 3 & 4 closer together. born in the same year if possible. So that is my ideal. 2 years between the first two kids. then 4 years (or close to) between #2 & 3. Then as close as possible for # 3 & 4. Silly trying to plan that way too though. Only God really gets to pick anyway. Ttc on specific times just never really seems to happen.