All my life I have hated my surname. It’s clunky, ugly and makes my name to boring and boyish when it’s written down. It’s such a strong sound and I just don’t resonate with it. Myself and my brother both dislike it and have spoken before about changing it.
Our decision to change our surname does not have anything to do with wanting to “cut ties” with our father or “start a new life”, it’s purely just because we really do not like our name. Our dad doesn’t mind us changing it, but I did get the impression he was a little upset that we could be “cutting” a really obvious connection with him.
Now the questions are…
There is a surname which our family was “supposed” to have but for some long-winded reason we don’t. We don’t hate it, but I don’t love its ending (-scott). Is that enough to turn it away? It would still keep a really obviously connection for our dad so there wouldn’t be any hard feelings there.
A family surname. Now. We have some realllly ugly surnames in my family (both sides), think Piddle… (not exact name but close enough it may as well be). The only “family” name we could use that would have significant meaning is from my mum’s side. I don’t love it. It’s fairly long (our current name is 5 letters, 1 syllable, this one would be 10 letters, 3 syllables). However, it’s the town my father (and us) grew up in and he still lives there today.
Something completely new. But I still want it to have some meaning or connection with my dad (Not too fussed on the connection or meaning with my mum as she’s currently doing the same thing).
Any thoughts or suggestions you have (obviously does not have to be actual names, unless you want to) would be massively appreciated. Thank you so much in advance.
I legally changed my surname due to a lack of connection with my Dad’s family after he passed away. I still wanted to honor my dad with my surname, but I didn’t want to have the same name as his family anymore.
Since my family is of Gaelic descent, I decided to change my surname to my dad’s middle and put O’ in front of it.
The best part is, it’s totally invented and unique to me. I have never met a single other person with my surname.
So that means “of” and my dad’s name. I think most cultures have this so you could do something similar in a way that is meaningful to you.
I think it would help us if you gave use some names you like or are thinking about using. That way we can understand you and your style better
Would you like your new surname to sound similar to your old one? Would you like it to have like a characteristic connection to your dad? What about your mom? Do you like word names as surnames? (I have family friends that when they got married they changed their last name to Waters). Do you want to stick to a certain culture? Etc
If you still want ties to your current surname, could you use some of the same letter? Something like [name_m]Smith[/name_m] to Smoke. You could also use your fathers first or middle name, or a version of the name. If his name was [name_m]Graham[/name_m], you could use that, or use [name_m]Grayson[/name_m], or [name_m]Beckham[/name_m].
I like the idea of picking something totally new to you that still really resonates and is connected to your Dad. Maybe his birth month? I really liked @jasminew solution maybe you could do something like that? Like Mc"Dadsname" or "dadsmiddle"son, or another prefix that means “son of” like [name_m]Fitz[/name_m]. Using his birthplace is a good suggestion, or maybe even the street name of where he grew up.
I know this is your choice, but it seems a major concern to you is maintaining a connection with your dad, so does he have a preference for any of your options? That might help narrow things down. Also are you and your brother changing your last names to the same name? Does he have a preference?
Sound like your options are:
Name your fam was supposed to have
Town/ mothers fam name
A name that’s say your father’s first/ middle of his father’s
A name as mentioned above with a culturally appropriate prefix
A -son name with Your father of grandfather’s name (ex Kolson, [name_u]Jameson[/name_u], [name_m]Thompson[/name_m])
A profession name (ex. [name_m]Miner[/name_m], [name_m]Tolliver[/name_m], [name_u]Mason[/name_u], [name_m]Fletcher[/name_m], [name_m]Baker[/name_m]…)
[name_f]Do[/name_f] you have any father, grandfather appropriate profession names?
A location name (ex. [name_u]Alcott[/name_u], [name_m]Bramwell[/name_m], [name_m]Brooks[/name_m]…)
Did you grow up somewhere really specific, huge brook running through the yard, lovely old cottage?
There are lots of ways surnames historically have been placed.
Something you are religiously connected to ([name_m]Saint[/name_m]?, Location? Word?)
I wouldn’t just pick a name I liked because I liked it though.
I’m sure you’ll find something perfect everyone can agree on.
