What's your take on middle names?

Birth Announcements
21

Well my parents didn’t get too creative with middle names, I have my dad’s middle name [name]Don[/name], (mine is spelled [name]Dawn[/name] though) and my sister has my mom’s middle name, [name]Ann[/name].

I, however, have decided I want my children to have 2 middle names. I decided this because my materal grandmother was named [name]Frances[/name] [name]Norma[/name] [name]Jean[/name] and my paternal grandfather is named [name]Ronald[/name] [name]Donald[/name] [name]Dale[/name] (there’s a story about how he got his name, if you are interested just ask and I’ll tell), each have two middle names. Since it comes from both sides of my family I would like to pass it on to my children.

I also plan to use the name [name]Jean[/name] as one of my future daughters’ middle names. I want to pass on [name]Jean[/name] because my maternal grandmother was [name]Frances[/name] [name]Norma[/name] [name]Jean[/name] (which I previously mentioned) and my paternal grandmother is [name]Deanna[/name] [name]Jean[/name]. I also would like to incorporate names that I just simply like.

I guess for me, I don’t have a real good idea about what a middle name should mean. I just know I want my children to have 2 middle names and that I want to carry on the name [name]Jean[/name].

I hope this helps a little bit and I didn’t completely confuse anyone.

22

My middle name is not the same as my grandmother’s name but it includes a variant of it that was chosen in part to honor her or it was coincidental and nice that it did, so I would say variants are honoring someone. Not everyone in my family has this, so it’s not like it was a tradition, it was merely considered and chosen above the other names on the list, which was supposed to be [name]Elizabeth[/name]. [name]Elizabeth[/name], as I understand it, was chosen against due to the fact there was a relative my father had a bad association with. Not to not honor exactly, he just disliked the name due to the association.

I also like a variant of my mother’s name and if she chooses to believe it’s an honor, I wouldn’t stop her. I just like the name.

My philosophy is a middle name can be anything. My least favorite are the ones that don’t mean anything to anybody, and also the fussy indecisive kind of middle name or series of middle names because you never think you’re ever having another baby in your whole life and those names would be “wasted” if you don’t use them. They are wasted if you use them all, they are not wasted if you never get to use any of them. But if you’re having more kids, save some of your favorites for them.

I treat a middle name as a very good place to put a special name, my philosophy on the first name is that it’s a tag, a label, a tool. Doesn’t mean it can’t be real nice, but I like short, easy to spell names because they are going to use that every day for the rest of their life, it’s not a beautiful song that stands out in daycare but it serves them their whole life. I think the middle name is better for that. What does the V. stand for? Something original, significant, substantial, personally favored. I like the structure of my own name, short label [name]Karen[/name], secret middle name, longer, prettier, significant sort of. People have to get that out of me. I don’t want them calling me that, I don’t think it’s practical, but I like it there. More than you asked.

Also, if you start honoring people, you might get stuck when someone doesn’t get honored because they aren’t your favorite (but may be your spouse’s especially most favorite) or their name is too ugly.

If you’re not having enough children to honor everyone equally, such as each child has up to 8 grandparents and step-grandparents and according to you and your spouse’s upbringing in these tricky times when divorce means twice as many parents, steps may mean more to you than some of your biological parents. Ok, even 4 is a lot, especially if you have to flip a coin on the first child of who gets honored and who has to wait until next time, if there is a next time, and this is not including extra people like aunts and uncles and dear college friends, with maybe special priority to folks who have died ahead of people who are still alive.

I like honoring people who matter, and I think in the equation, the baby is also a person who matters - honor them with a good name, no matter where it came from.

23

I had another thought, which I was going to write it in another thread but I didn’t actually have any suggestions to add, and also from the celebrity weird weird names thread. It’s a good idea, I think, to pause how the middle name will sound “as a word with other words” (especially if it turns their first name into something yucky or offensive) but in general, don’t overthink it. Nobody is going to call them their whole name in life unless you love it very much and insist on its use.

First and last name. Not that the middle name is an afterthought, but I don’t necessarily go with the philosophy that you should choose the middle name that’s most fluid with the first and last names. Most people go by first and last name in life. That should be what matters primarily.

Hypothetical example:
If you love the name [name]Margaret[/name] in the middle but the name [name]Rosalie[/name] just “goes better,” you should almost always still choose [name]Margaret[/name], unless it’s really bad and makes the First-Middle-Last into something heinous. If you love the name [name]Pilot[/name] and you think it would be neat for his middle name to be Inspektor, kids at school aren’t going to call him [name]Pilot[/name] Inspektor. Same for [name]Moxie[/name] Crimefighter. It’s just a cool middle name. (which I think is too unusual to copy!, but makes an adequate example).

I’m also thinking, and I think this goes against most people, that you don’t need to hyper-feminize middle names to offset a more unisex or (perhaps stolen) masculine name on a girl. I do think it’s good for girls and boys in the same family to have some distinction whether they are a boy or a girl, a unisex girls name and a boy-boy-boy name, or vice versa. But most people, (I don’t think, and I could be totally wrong about this) don’t opt to be known by their middle name or search for some practical nickname among the (forgive me) slop some people think up to name their kids. Or they shouldn’t. If you’re a little weirded out by the first name you want to give your child and that they may have trouble and want to use their middle name, that’s called a warning sign. The only thing that is good for is if you are naming the baby after one of yourselves and because father goes by his first name, junior might go by the middle name, but that name is pre-chosen.

I just had to get that off my chest.

24

I think middle names are a great place to honor family. Most people in my family have middle names that mean something. My first name, [name]Melissa[/name], was very popular when I was born, but I was given a family surname as a middle name rather than the popular place holders of the time, [name]Leigh[/name], [name]Lynn[/name] or [name]Anne[/name]. This creativity always made me feel a little special, and moreso that it had history in my family. My older brother has my mothers maiden name as his middle name. I intend to honor family or important people in my life in some way when I name my children. It could be the first name and then get more creative with the middle or vice versa. I dont think my family has the best first names floating around to chose from, but I wont be afraid to use my great-grandmothers maiden name if I thought it worked.
I thinkmiddle names could just mean something to the parents. A favorite place, anniversary month, artist, songs etc. Something that has a story to go along with it. I like it when names are something more than “I just like how it sounds.”

25

I support middles as wild cards. It’s great to honor family if that works for you but there’s no need to be tied to it. There are many names I appreciate in my family and people I would love to honor–too many for it to look like I’m not playing favorites, which always makes me uncomfortable. Because I haven’t started a family right away, I doubt I will be having enough children to honor many relatives. On top of that, if we have a boy, my husband wants to name him [name]Zadok[/name] and I told him I would be more comfortable with that as a middle name. That’s part of the purpose of middle names, too :wink:

26

there’s got to be two middle names no matter what anyone says, to me!
love your kids’ names:)