ok ok … even if I never have real closure, I’ll stop harassing people here with my neurosis No more on this. People have definitely been super supportive. And this thread did help. Especially Missusaytch’s suggestion to go find meaning for [name]Ruby[/name]. But not just that - everyone. Thanks.
[name]Ruby[/name] is in my lap right now, sucking on a frozen strawberry in one of those mesh baby feeders. [name]Red[/name] sticky mess dripping down her face. [name]Just[/name] thought I’d give you a visual.
Oh man, I wish I could use [name]Ruby[/name] one day. But I live in Germany, the pronunciation would get messed up and it sounds kind of ridiculous with a [name]German[/name] lastname and without roots that somehow explain why I chose an English name. So here it comes: I envy you. I envy you cause you could use this wonderful name (and I’m not even a fan of stones or whatever, the sound on it’s own already makes it wonderful to me).
You could go for a very classic, ancient, special middle name.
[name]Pam[/name], I reread your response too … and I really really appreciate it. The point about her loving her name - that is so reassuring to me. Who cares whether the other “moms” think I named her right. If she’s going to love it, I did good!
That said, do you offering naming consulting? If I could have gone back and hired you (assuming I knew about it) I would have! You have a great site here, and I think if you offered some consulting service - more than just an email, but say a phone conversation … the recommendation would be worth a lot. I think there are plenty of people like me who need some “authority” on names to validate. I would have paid mutliple hundreds of dollars for a 1-hour consult that ended in a definitive recommendation. Easy. And you deserve that! I’m sure there are many people who are just stuck and would love an authority. I know there are naming services, but I always figured they take your money and just spit back some generic top 10 list. It’s too late for this baby, but if/when I have another, I would totally hire you for a consult if it was a service you offered!
When I named my son it was ‘the one’. No questions asked. It ticked every box, honoured amazing people and still fits him perfectly. I never felt that way when we named our daughter. We named her with the perfect middle name (a name that we couldn’t use as a first name) and used a name that we loved but that wasn’t ‘the one’ for her first name. We had a lovely short list and despite searching and searching just never found ‘the one’. [name]Don[/name]'t get me wrong I absolutely adore her name. It’s exactly right for her. It’s amazing but I just felt like is wasn’t perfect. For the first 6 months I looked on Nameberry to see if I missed something and it has taken me a while to realise that ‘the one’ didn’t exist. People who know me and know I love her name probably wouldn’t be able to understand that little niggle that was inside.
Her name wasn’t ‘the one’ when I named her. I’ve made her name ‘the one’ since. Two things really helped me. Firstly, I found out after she was born that her name is actually the name of her great-great grandmother. Finding that family connection helped. Maybe find something about [name]Ruby[/name], a meaning, it’s history, the birthstone and someone you love that is born in [name]July[/name] . Find something that helps tie special meaning to it.
Secondly, my daughter has a perfect middle name that honours her wonderful, gentle and amazing great-grandmother. We have taken to calling her by her first and middle name rather than just her first name., [name]Alice[/name] [name]Pearl[/name] rather than just [name]Alice[/name]. Maybe finding a middle name that you have a connection to would help you too, then you could call her [name]Ruby[/name] …
I love [name]Ruby[/name] by the way. I am born in [name]July[/name] so the birthstone meaning is special to me.
I hope you find some peace to enjoy your little girl and her adorable name.
Hey [name]Riva[/name],
everyone here has talked about what it means to them as mothers but I thought I’d put my two cents in as a daughter.
My mom was a single mom too, she was so overwhelmed with being a new parent (and really in denial that I was a scorpio -> seriously she didn’t have anything prepped and stubbornly told the doctor I would just have to wait another day, or preferably a week, to be born so I’d be a Sagittarius -> I was born on my due date. She’s not usually superstitious but for whatever reason this was a big issue for her — anyway…) she just gave me a first name. [name]Alexandra[/name]. Then she was worried it was too masculine and not cute enough and toyed with calling me [name]Sandy[/name] instead -> I’m really glad that didn’t stick.
Another thing that she pushed aside at the time was having me baptized. I wasn’t baptized until I was 8 with my baptism I also got two middle names. I never had any before then. I still think it was one of the coolest experiences I ever shared with my mom. I got to help pick out the church, minister and my godparents. But what I loved most is that my mom gave me the choice to choose my own name. She gave me all the reason she love [name]Alexandra[/name] but also told me I could pick something else if I’d like and [name]Alexandra[/name] could become a middle name. It didn’t. For middle name choices she gave me a short list of 5 options for each of the two I was going to pick for myself. I got to choose all on my own. It was really cool. It gave me a whole different appreciation of ownership over who I was and really bonded me with my mom.
So… I think as long as your little [name]Ruby[/name] is registered with and has health insurance (which you seem to have taken care of), I don’t think you need to worry about giving her a middle name now. You could spend the next few years coming up with combos you really like and then when she becomes a “big girl” allow her to make her first “big girl” decision by choosing her own middle names -> with your guidance of course.
In the mean time… don’t fret about it and enjoy your beautiful little girl.
Agree! All of those middle names are beautiful with [name]Ruby[/name]. Follow your rules with the mn; the end result will be perfect for your dd. Now breathe. Forgive yourself. Make peace. Complete the birth certificate. And move forward.
I like [name]Ruby[/name]. It seems that you do too since you’ve called her that for 6 months. If I were you I would keep [name]Ruby[/name] as her first name and you could give her a middle name that “fits” all your requirements or a family name. Good luck and don’t stress too much. Fill out her birth certificate for one year, haha :). LOL
Firstly, I think [name]Ruby[/name] is a beautiful name.
But I really wanted to offer my experience… I had some name remorse about naming my second daughter [name]Laurel[/name]. Not that I didn’t love the name but more because I felt like after all the naming hype that it was a little letdown. It’s taken me a bit but I was hooked on the name as soon as she started using it herself! She’s 18 months now and constantly says her name and points to herself. It comes out something like roar-well which is so darling there is nothing to not love about that! So in time, I really think you will grow to love your choice. Good luck.
[name]Ruby[/name] is beautiful!!! [name]Every[/name] connotation to me is so pretty. I think [name]Ruby[/name] can be cute, sophisticated, sweet, vintage, classic, red, precious etc… This child is obviously [name]Ruby[/name]. I agree with pp that you could choose a lovely Greek/Latin middle name. There are millions of names out there. I think most people think oh, should I have chosen that? I didn’t get to name my daughter the name I wanted and had to compromise with my husband. Although I love her name, 2 yrs later, I still am a little sad tht I didn’t get to use what I wanted. But again, I love her name and can’t imagine her as anything else. Vitamom is right, hearing them say their name is precious!
I think you should love the name, and you do. It is important, but it is just a name. She is [name]Ruby[/name]. [name]Love[/name] it and embrace and move on to the many other heart wrenching decisions you will have as a parent. Good luck!
[name]Hi[/name]. [name]Ruby[/name] is a beautiful name.Its one of my all time faves. I think [name]Laurel[/name] would be a good middle name as it has a greek background and goes lovely with [name]Ruby[/name]. You should have no doubts about her name
My 5 year old daughter is [name]Ruby[/name], and she loves her name as much as I do! She also gets tons of compliments on it. I’m sure she’ll love it. Maybe [name]Ruby[/name] [name]Ariadne[/name]?
No more on this. People have definitely been super supportive. And this thread did help. Especially Missusaytch’s suggestion to go find meaning for [name]Ruby[/name]. But not just that - everyone. Thanks.