[name]Aster[/name] is a beautiful name that will serve your daughter well all her life. It’s delicate but not fragile, has a sweet but strong sound, and a lovely connotation.
You obviously see the value of thinking long-term; well, keep in mind that the ages at which she might possibly be teased about such a lovely name will be short and few, and mean little kids can always find something to tease about, even if a child has a tease-proof name. Plus, you don’t want to deny her and yourselves such a lovely name just because of the opinions of some theoretical petty-minded kids. As my husband and I have been searching ourselves for the perfect girl name, I’ve become convinced that considering the opinions of as few people as possible is the way to go. Other people will ALWAYS have their own history or connotation with a name, but once they get to know your little girl, they will be more influenced by that.
If you both love [name]Aster[/name], you should go for it!
I know an adult [name]Lark[/name]. She does not seem to have trouble being taken seriously, but may use her given name on resumes, I’ve never asked.
Suggestions:
[name]Esta[/name]- variation of [name]Esther[/name]/[name]Asta[/name]/[name]Astra[/name]
[name]Aliza[/name] = [name]Joy[/name]
[name]Aviva[/name] = [name]Spring[/name]
[name]Shira[/name] = Song
Orlit/[name]Orla[/name]/[name]Orly[/name]/[name]Ori[/name]/[name]Oriel[/name]/[name]Liora[/name]/[name]Eliora[/name]–variations on the hebrew word for light, mean light is mine, light of god, I have a light, and so on. [name]Orla[/name] and [name]Oriel[/name] are also words for golden in other places.
[name]Calandra[/name]/[name]Alondra[/name]/Alaudra meanings related to [name]Lark[/name].
[name]Just[/name] wanted to give you all an update and thank you again.
DH and I have decided that what we are going to do is go through this list you all have suggested of names that are reminiscent of [name]Aster[/name]/[name]Blythe[/name]/[name]Lark[/name] and pick out the names we both like.
I’m coming to terms with the fact there is may be no happy agreement here- DH just can’t love [name]Blythe[/name]- he pronounces it like “Blye” and it sort of makes my hair stand on end… and, even though we both like [name]Aster[/name], he is far more worried than I about the potential for teasing with [name]Aster[/name], thus making neither of these great choices, I suppose. He said he “will” name her [name]Lark[/name] (my original first choice), but I think it is just out of shear frustration.
So we will go through the names you listed, pick out our favorites and put them in a hat with [name]Aster[/name], [name]Blythe[/name] and [name]Lark[/name] and draw one. Probably Friday, given the insanity of this week…
and that will be her name. We have both agreed to live with that, but do we do want to add other names to the pool given that there is unhappiness about all three of our current choices.
Any other suggestions you have on names or on approaches to working this out would be great.
For reference, here are the names I have personally picked from your suggestions to be added to our pool (he has not had time to go over them yet)
One other idea is to take your new list of names, to each secretly rank them 1 (for favorite) through whatever (i.e. the number of names you have on your revised list), and pick the one that has the lowest score (i.e. the ‘highest’ combined ranking).
Another spin on this would be for you to each secretly rank each name one stars through 5 stars (5 being the highest), and pick the name with the highest combined score.
Hey, I’m all for practical solutions, so hopefully whatever method you choose will work. Good luck! Keep us posted . . .
I hope the picking from a hat strategy works for you, but I think a ranking schema (as was just suggested by prior poster) is more likely to get you closer to what you want. Anyway, good luck …
I am preparing a longer post, but I just wanted to come back to the name [name]Coral[/name]/[name]Cora[/name].
I’ve seen you write numerous times that you & DH both love this name, BUT that you HATE [name]Cori[/name] so have vetoed it on those grounds. Wait a minute, is [name]Cori[/name] even a standard nn for [name]Coral[/name]/[name]Cora[/name]? Maybe [name]Cori[/name] would come out of [name]Coral[/name], but why would you nn as [name]Cori[/name] a child whose full name is [name]Cora[/name]? It just changes one letter and doesn’t make the name any shorter. It just seems totally WEIRD to me to think that [name]Cori[/name] would be a potential nn for [name]Cora[/name]. I think you should strongly reconsider [name]Cora[/name]. I think [name]Cori[/name] as nn for [name]Cora[/name] is highly unlikely. [name]Cora[/name] needs no nn. It is so sweet & short.
I really urge you to give [name]Cora[/name] a little more thought. Or if her name is [name]Coral[/name], with [name]Cora[/name] as nn, why would she need another nn (ie [name]Cori[/name])? I know you are particularly concerned bc your son ended up with nn [name]Gabe[/name] from [name]Gabriel[/name], which you didn’t want. But [name]Gabe[/name] is kind of the the really obvious, standard nn for [name]Gabriel[/name]. [name]Cori[/name], for me, is not a nn at all for [name]Coral[/name] or [name]Cora[/name]. Moreover, it’s a boy’s name (at least for me). [name]Just[/name] a thought …
I really think you would be safe with [name]Cora[/name] (no nn) or with [name]Coral[/name] (nn [name]Cora[/name]).
I’m glad you have a plan and a date set!
One thing I would suggest is that since you came up with this plan because you said you are not finding [name]Aster[/name], [name]Blythe[/name], or [name]Lark[/name] to be THE name and that they all have some “negativity” associated with them, I would probably not put any of these three names in the bag at all. (It just seems like if you should pick one of them, you might end up back where you started). On the other hand, if you can’t imagine doing the random selection without these names, you might not be as ready to give up on them and go along with this plan as you thought you are . . .
I would also probably eliminate [name]Juno[/name] since it could be a nickname for [name]Juniper[/name] and by having both in the bag it seems like you’re unfairly increasing the odds of ending up with a [name]Juno[/name] (unless that’s your intent). I also happen to prefer [name]Juniper[/name] to [name]Juno[/name] as the full name
I also want to add another vote for including [name]Cora[/name] in the list; it’s just such a wonderful name, and it sounds great with [name]Miriam[/name], and matches well with [name]Gabriel[/name], and as others have said, I don’t think there is a real danger of getting it turned to [name]Cori[/name] if you don’t want that (though I could see a potential “[name]Cor[/name]” issue).
Finally, I have to agree with the idea of making your random pick a little less random by ranking your choices, just to ensure that no one feels disappointed in the end (though I think the best thing is to simply take any name off the list that would leave either of you feeling disappointed in the first place).
I think you have some great names on your new list (I especially love [name]Bryony[/name]!)
Thank you for your thoughts… hm… I wonder if it is a location thing, because I grew up with a friend [name]Coralyn[/name] and she was ALWAYS called [name]Cori[/name] and there is a little girl at my son’s school named [name]Coral[/name] who is also called [name]Cori[/name].
I also can’t imagine WHY in the world someone would butcher the lovely [name]Cora[/name]/[name]Coral[/name] to [name]Cori[/name], but it seems to happen around here, for whatever reason…
BUT your suggestion has caused me to pause and think about it some more… I had assumed [name]Cori[/name] was the logical nn because I’ve seen it happen twice, but perhaps it isn’t the logical nn like [name]Gabe[/name] is…
what does anyone else think? If we had a [name]Coral[/name], would we automatically have a [name]Cori[/name]?
Honestly, for whatever reason (probably the friend [name]Cori[/name] growing up) the distaste for [name]Cori[/name] has been so strong that I haven’t ever seriously considered this name.
I think that if you used [name]Coral[/name] as a full name with [name]Cora[/name] as the nickname, she would already have a nickname and so it would be much less likely for her to be called by yet another nickname.
For a nickname to stick, I think it has to be at least partially condoned by the person with the name and/or her parents. I have a slightly similar situation – we named our daughter [name]Laura[/name] (one of the few names my own husband and I could agree on, btw), even though I HATE the nickname [name]Laurie[/name]. My daughter is 8 months and so far only one person has called her [name]Laurie[/name], and that was my friend’s spanish speaking nanny.
Also, nicknames ending in “i” and “ie” have really fallen out of favor recently, and will continue to trend downwards, so I don’t think the jump to [name]Cori[/name] would be that automatic, particulalrly if you affirmatively discourage it.
What I wanted to say is that I don’t think you should lose focus on your criteria for a name. Here are the criteria you gave before.
A. They are light and airy
B. They are happy
C. They are naturey
D. They are uncommon
E. They are soft
F. They are short but substantial
G. They communicate a feeling of joy and freedom of spirit
H. They non-frilly, but still communicate femininity
Now I don’t know how you would rank these various criteria in terms of importance, but assuming you treat them all as equal, here’s how I would score the names on your list (and a few more that have been suggested):
[name]Lark[/name] ” meets criteria A, B, C, D, E, G (maybe F) ” score 6 (or 7) out of 8
[name]Aster[/name] ” A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H ” score 8/8, but nn worries
[name]Blythe[/name] ” A, B, D, E, F, G, H ” score 7/8
[name]Freya[/name] ” A, B, D, E, F, G, H ” score 7/8
[name]Juno[/name] ”A, B, D, E, F, G, H ” score 7/8
[name]Juniper[/name] ” A, B, C, D, E, G, H ” score 7/8
[name]Bryony[/name] ” A, B, C, D, E, G, H (maybe F) ” score 7 (or 8)/8
[name]Gwyneth[/name] ” A, B, D, E, F, G, H ” score 7/8
[name]Ara[/name] ” A, B, D, E, F, G, (maybe H) ” score 6 (or 7)/8
[name]Carys[/name] ” A, B, D, E, F, G, H ” score 7/8
[name]Coral[/name] ” A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H ” score 8/8 but nn worries
[name]Asha[/name] ” A, B, D, E, F, G, H ” score 7/8
[name]Eliora[/name] ” A, B, D, E, G, H (maybe F) ” score 6 (or 7)/8
[name]Phoebe[/name] ” A, B, C, E, F, G, H (maybe D) ” score 7 (or 8)/8
[name]Calla[/name] ” A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H ” score 8/8
[name]Naomi[/name] ” A, B, E, F, G, H ” score 6/8
[name]Aria[/name] ” A, B, E, F, G, H (maybe D) ” score 6 (or 7)/8
[name]Luna[/name] ” A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H ” score 8/8
[name]Bliss[/name] ” A, B, D, E, F, G, H ” score 7/8
[name]Joy[/name] ” A, B, D, E, F, G, H ” score 7/8
[name]Celeste[/name] ” A, B, E, F, G, H (maybe D) ” score 6 (or 7)/8
[name]Acacia[/name] ” A, B, C, D, E, G, H (maybe F) ” score 7 (or 8)/8
[name]Aura[/name] ” A, B, D, E, F, G, H ” score 7/8
[name]Echo[/name] ” A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H ” score 8/8
If you draw out of a hat, you might want to just put the high scoring names in (those that receive an 8/8 or at least a 7/8). The best scorers are: [name]Aster[/name], [name]Bryony[/name], [name]Coral[/name], [name]Phoebe[/name], [name]Calla[/name], [name]Luna[/name], [name]Acacia[/name], [name]Echo[/name]. Of course, I know some of these names weren’t on your list to begin with!
P.S. What would bother you more, [name]Cori[/name] as potential nn or A$$ teasing? To say it again, though, to me [name]Coral[/name] is NOT [name]Cori[/name]! [name]Coral[/name] doesn’t even need a nn. Or come up with a totally different nn like [name]Ray[/name]?!
Of course not. I give you this: My name is [name]Karen[/name]. It has always been just [name]Karen[/name]. [name]Coral[/name] or [name]Cora[/name] is a short name. I have never been called [name]Kari[/name] (even when I really wanted to be). It is definitely to me, not self-evident that a nickname will come up at all. [name]Cora[/name] or [name]Coral[/name] is, to me, exactly likened to [name]Karen[/name] in the way that it shall have no nickname unless you establish it yourself.
It may be so different a time and place from my experience, so I don’t know if there is an epidemic of -y-ing to names, so I don’t know if I’m just blowing smoke here, but it seems to me, it is not going to be any issue at all. Some names do “invite” people to shorten despite wishes, like [name]Thomas[/name] or [name]David[/name] or [name]Susan[/name], but I don’t think [name]Coral[/name] or [name]Cora[/name] is susceptible, and just kick them in the booty if they do. I cannot guarantee this fact, I can just tell you it’s really your choice. The [name]Cori[/name]'s you know of were likely tagged that by their parents - see the many examples here of parents listing intentional nicknames for their children before they are born. This establishes the expectation that people will call your child what you want them to be called, rather than what they might shorten the name to themselves.
***Caution: she may want to be called [name]Cori[/name] and encourage her friends to do so, once she has control of the issue. It never worked for me, but she may prefer [name]Cori[/name]. I’d let it go.
I tend to agree that picking out of a hat isn’t the best, especially if several names included in the draw are ones that one person seems to absolutely detest (was it you who said you stopped asking about [name]Juno[/name]/[name]Juniper[/name] because your DH hates it???)
About [name]Cora[/name]/[name]Coral[/name], I also agree with deirdre that I don’t even see where “[name]Cori[/name]” would come from, esp. with [name]Cora[/name]. The names are short enough as is, and if you insist on full names at home it’s much less likely that your daughter would be comfortable with classmates and friends shortening her name, she’d be more likely to also insist on her full name. JMO.
[name]Just[/name] to add my two cents about [name]Cora[/name]/[name]Cori[/name] - I think you will have control up until the point where she is old enough to pick what she likes. Unfortunately, I do think around that time names ending in an i have a bit of an advantage - myself and everyone I knew went through a phase of writing our names with an i and dotting it with a smiley face or a heart. It’s the only time in my life where I’ve gone by [name]Gabi[/name] rather than [name]Gaby[/name]. That said, it was just a phase. Funnily enough, my mum (who prefers my full name to [name]Gaby[/name] anyway) is now the only person who still uses [name]Gabi[/name] but as long as it’s spelt with one B I don’t mind it.
So just something to consider - but as I said, it’s a short phase girls can go through, and if you love [name]Coral[/name] or [name]Cora[/name] I wouldn’t let it put you off.
I actually like the draw out of a hat idea. As long as you both feel you can live with anything that goes IN the hat, I quite like how it has an element of fate about it, almost as if she’s picking her own name. But as I said, you both have to be able to live with it, and the rating system pthers suggested may be more practical.
Good luck! I feel like I already know your little girl with her [name]Blythe[/name]/[name]Lark[/name]/something else personality, and I’m really looking forward to hearing what name you choose. I think at this point, once the decision’s made, you’ll both totally fall in love with it and won’t be able to imagine her called anything else!
I’ll add another vote to [name]Cora[/name]/[name]Coral[/name]. It’s one of my absolute favorite names, and in all the time I’ve had it on my list, I’ve never thought about [name]Cori[/name] as a nickname. In fact, one of the reasons I liked it was that I already have a son [name]Toby[/name] and I didn’t want to have two "ee’ ending names for my children…too cutesy for me. [name]Coral[/name]/[name]Cora[/name] seemed perfect because it woud either end with L or A, but never an E sound.
Think about it!
I also think that you should only put in names that you both like. Putting in names that either one really detests would just cause more problems.
I, too, love [name]Cora[/name]/[name]Coral[/name], and don’t think that [name]Cori[/name] is the automatic nickname. I know of two Corinnes, for example, and both of them have always been “[name]Corinne[/name],” without any nicknames.
I think [name]Carys[/name] is best, now I know you’re considering it. It means beloved and has a lighter feel to [name]Coral[/name] plus also not being a plant that lives in the sea:) You’re very bold just picking one out of a hat like that! Good luck and I hope it’s one you really love in the end:)
Its really funny- I should have clarified in my previous post- my DH DID ask me to stop begging for [name]Juno[/name]/[name]Juniper[/name] (this was before she was born). and I did stop. But, then he saw it on these lists you all have been making for me and said, “you know what, I really like those names now!” I asked him what changed and he said he didn’t know, but he really does like them now. We’ve talked about names enough that I know he’s being honest, so I’m happy about that
In that case, I am going to be hoping [name]Juno[/name] comes out of the hat! SUCH a gorgeous name. But honestly, I think all of the names on your shortlist are lovely, and convey the same feeling. Good luck! (And I hope you’re feeling better?)
