Attn please: Nameberry site owner(s)

I was wondering if you ever give advice to anyone who is in dire need, as I can understand if you do not make a habit of it since there would be ALOT of people who would want your input, as you are the baby name gurus of our time. I highly respect your opinions/advice on names in your books. I am so desperate now that I am reaching out to you. I was just wondering if you have a moment if you could tell me what you think of changing a baby’s name at over 2 months old and what your take is on my situation. I totally understand if I do not hear back from you, and I thank you for taking the time to even read this post and/or consider my question!


Hmmm…probably not something I would want to do. [name]How[/name] do you explain to everyone that you changed your mind? And do you explain to your child that his/her name used to be this but now it’s that?

You are not alone. There have been at least 4 poster I have seen in the last year that have changed their babies name as late as 4 months. If you want to do it do it sooner than later.

I think Rosenkrantz and Satran are going to have to include a chapter in their next book on this (apparently) not uncommon problem: “Beyond [name]Sariah[/name] and [name]Silas[/name]: What To Name Your [name]Baby[/name] After You Decide Not To Go With The Birth Name.”

Sorry. That sounds as though I’m making light of your dilemma.

But I am wondering – is this a new problem in human history? If so – why now? If not – how did people solve it before? I suspect that people just started calling a kid by his loved nickname without much fuss, but maybe I’m wrong.

[name]Bonnie[/name]- You have addressed several very important points. And for what it is worth, even though I know you were not trying to make light of my name changing situation nor others, I couldn’t help but have a good laugh at the potential title of a future book. I think it is the first time I have really truly been able to laugh about this.

Jhansi: I have considered what other people may think and having to explain this to my child as well, but I am so sick over this that I am beyond caring now. As my emotional and physical health are SERIOUSLY starting be affected by this.

If it’s upsetting you that much, just change it. Your child is only 2 months old, and there’s no point having some feeling of discord with the name you chose putting a damper on this time for you or your family. If there is a name you would prefer to use that you’ve already decided on, I’d just change it now and be done with it. Then you’ll be at peace. It’s certainly not an unheard of thing to do this early on–I’ve read countless stories of it on the internet. And I’ve known people personally to change the name of an adopted child after a time, once it started to feel to them that the original name just wasn’t ‘right’. So go ahead and do it, especially if you already have something else picked out that you’re going to feel better about. At this stage your child doesn’t know the difference–but by 7 months or so, that won’t be the case.

[name]Don[/name]'t over-complicate things. I realize this is a very emotional issue for you, but you will feel better when all is said and done. Go ahead and change the name to what you [name]LOVE[/name]. Send out cute little announcements to friends and family. Laugh about it. Enjoy your new little " ." Good luck!

Are you [name]Soraya[/name]'s mom? [name]Just[/name] thinking abt you last night. I read the Kite Runner for the first time and so, came across my first [name]Soraya[/name] outside of yours. The character in the novel is such a lovely, selfless person and I thought it was a great connection for the name. Anyway, thought abt just finding an old post of yours and telling you that I really think you made a good choice, but looks like you needed to hear it anyway.
I repeat: You made a good choice. But if it’s causing you this much stress, maybe you just need to choose an entirely new name that won’t bring up all this emotion for you.

I agree with the previous 2 posters for sure. You are supposed to love your baby’s name. Who gives a flying fish what other people think about you changing it! If they don’t understand, its their problem. Its not right to be upset with your name choice. Find the name you love and change that sweet baby’s name! Good luck to you sweetie!

A good friend of mine changed her little girls name when she was four months old. She felt just like you seem to: sick over the situation. She spent months trying to make the name feel right, but she and her husband eventually realized it just wasn’t working. So they had it changed.

Before they had it officially changed, they called her by the new name for about a week, to make sure it was absolutely what they wanted. Then they sent out “re announcement cards” :slight_smile:

I agree with the other berries, hun. It is so much easier for you to make a quick fix now then to regret it, and wish it different in the future. My friend always jokes about how she can’t wait to tell her daughter that her name was almost [name]Josephine[/name] (now it is [name]Seraphina[/name]) :slight_smile:

Thanks so much [name]Layla[/name]! U r exactly right! That is how I feel…like my husband and I have been spending the past 2 months trying to make the name feel right and it is NOT working! [name]Hence[/name] why I have been on here agonizing and agonizing! It is the first thing I think of in the a.m. and the last thing I think of in the p.m.! If it was so right of a name, I do not think any person in their right mind would be posting on here over and over again and leaving the computer on ALL [name]DAY[/name] just to check the responses like a maniac! So glad to hear I am NOT alone even if I am a minority!

Oh [name]Layla[/name] , 1 more thing! I have yet to even send out her birth announcements! I usually have them out at 6 weeks! So THAT alone tells me ALOT!


[name]How[/name] perfect that you haven’t sent out the birth announcements yet! (That is NOT to imply a hindrance to changing her name if you had sent them out.)

We have all been virtual witnesses to your efforts to make the name [name]Soraya[/name] work, and to the fact that it has not. I would make sure you have extra cute or pretty birth announcements on which to proudly present the name of your daughter that feels right to you and brings you the most joy. Wishing you all the best.

Hey, Janda!

I know I’m not [name]Pam[/name] or [name]Linda[/name], but I agree with the majority. We’ve seen you struggle with this decision since [name]Soraya[/name]'s birth - maybe even before! - and it just sounds like it isn’t settling. That isn’t right. Maybe [name]Soraya[/name] isn’t a name you are going to grow to love again, and maybe you are settling. Maybe [name]Mara[/name] isn’t right, either. Maybe you need to start again, actually. It might be a good idea to just think about what your daughter looks like and acts like, and put a name to her face. Or, maybe you just go fishing for the perfect name again, now that you’ve met her! Or, it could be that [name]Mara[/name] or [name]Amara[/name], regardless of how close they are to Navarra, are the right names for your daughter. [name]Just[/name] go with your gut and don’t let this bother you anymore, okay?

Take care,

[name]Lemon[/name] :slight_smile:

Oh sweetie! Nothing is worth that! (S)He is your child! Call her (or him) what you like. Maybe I’m easy-going, but I can’t imagine serious people will care or do anything but respect your wishes and feelings. And the rest do not matter.

Jhanda, I’m so sorry that this whole process has been so stressful for you! I’m tempted, like [name]Lemon[/name], to advise that you start over. [name]Soraya[/name] and [name]Mara[/name] must be so caught up in the stress of the moment that you can’t really judge either name objectively any more. My advice would be to make a new list, of other names that you love, and see what you can come up with. Perhaps you’ll find THE name on that list, or perhaps you’ll find that none of them compares to [name]Mara[/name], or to [name]Soraya[/name], for you - in which case you’ll know that name is right for your daughter.

Also, I thought I’d recommend Swistle if you want to get advice from a sort of authoritative entity - Swistle [name]Baby[/name] Names is a blog a little like an agony aunt column, and you could write in with your name-related dilemna and she will post a reply on her blog, plus readers can give their (always very respectful, that I’ve seen) opinions and thoughts in the comments section. Here is the link :

I so hope that you find the right name soon and get to start enjoying your named baby girl! [name]Auburn[/name]

Change it, change it, change it. Two months is nothing. We changed at over six months and it caused me serious sleepless nights. I refuse to apologize … it just took that long. We couldn’t – ok I couldn’t – find a name that suited my daughter. It was as simple as that. It took a [name]LONG[/name] TIME. It has to last 100 years. [name]Don[/name]'t beat yourself up… it’s not supposed to be easy – that’s how you end up with a baby named [name]Neveah[/name], [name]Michayla[/name] or [name]Brittney[/name].

I know exactly what your friend was going through – I went through the same thing. It’s a terrible feeling. People think you are mentally ill – just name the baby, they tell you. It isn’t that easy. The guilt is overwhelming!

Apologies to anybody who named their daughter those names, however, I don’t think there are many on this site. Seriously, though – I know exactly what you mean – I lost sleep, I agonized. I cried. It was awful. But in the end, after endless searching, we found a name that suited her (I think). You’ll never be 100% sure. [name]Remember[/name] that there will always be a bit of name remorse, a teeny-tiny amount. If you can find a name that you like 98%, go for it and don’t look back! There is no perfect name! I wish you all the best because I know exactly what you are going through. xoxo [name]Lilibet[/name]