Have you ever felt guilty about liking a name? Either a name that you has a bad meaning or connection? [name_m]How[/name_m] do you deal with it?
Im loving [name_m]Cohen[/name_m]. But [name_m]Ive[/name_m] heard that its not a good name in the Jewish community. Or its like the name [name_u]Messiah[/name_u]… Or like [name_m]Jesus[/name_m]… What do you think? Is is that bad?
I have read that it’s quite offensive to give [name_m]Cohen[/name_m] as a first name. I like it as well but it seems to be a no-go. ”
All the good names are offensive or something! Ugh!
Perhaps search your own family tree for a more personally meaningful surname…
There was a long thread on this recently, you may want to search it. I an still rather unable to see why it is considered offensive, and I am pretty conscious of potentially offensive names and put a lot of effort into being socially and culturally aware and unoffensive.
I don’t think you need to feel guilty for liking it. I like the name [name_m]Adolf[/name_m], and I’m sure that is VERY offensive to many (for good reason) and for that reason I would never use it, but I don’t see any reason to feel guilty for thinking it would be an appealing name without the associations.
I’m under the impression that [name_m]Cohen[/name_m] is a title in the Jewish community (like Your [name_f]Honor[/name_f] for a judge), so it is not something you would want a person named.
This discussion was also happening on Reddit a while ago. Here is a link: http://www.reddit.com/r/namenerds/comments/32j4cb/is_cohen_offensive/
The [name_m]Cohen[/name_m] thread, if anyone’s still interested. The reviews seem pretty mixed. I really think it’s an individual choice. I wouldn’t personally use a name that’s so controversial; on the other hand, I don’t think anyone deserves to be insulted, harassed, or beaten down by a religiously inclined individual just because they loved the name and decided to use it.
Sound:
[name_f]Ottilie[/name_f]: so many people hear it as “odd-ily”.
[name_f]Mina[/name_f]: others just hear mean
Meaning:
[name_f]Cecilia[/name_f]: The name is so beautiful to me, but the meaning not so much. (I’d still use this one in a heart beat)
[name_f]Perdita[/name_f]: Besides meaning lost, the association with a the Dalmation
[name_f]Romilly[/name_f]: “man of [name_m]Rome[/name_m]” 
Besides [name_f]Cecilia[/name_f], I’ll probably use them as names for pets. That way I still get to say them but without the potential for name regret.
Honestly, no I’ve never felt guilty about liking a name. [name_m]Even[/name_m] if I like a name and others hate it, well…hey, it’s all our opinions. People on here used to rave about [name_f]Clementine[/name_f]. [name_f]Do[/name_f] I like it? Not really. [name_f]Do[/name_f] they have to feel bad for liking it? No. I kind of like the name [name_f]Jemima[/name_f]. Call it a guilty pleasure name, if you will. Some find it offensive. [name_f]Do[/name_f] I? No. [name_f]Do[/name_f] I feel bad about liking it? No. I do feel that we do bear some responsibility to be mindful of any painful history or associations with a name, in that we should realize that what name we like could be painful for someone else to hear. Does that mean we can’t use it? Not necessarily.
All that being (rather draw-out) said, you can like a name. It’s not wrong. Many people on here have GP names that they love but for whatever reason, cannot/ will not use.
I like [name_f]Cecelia[/name_f] (and it’s variants), [name_f]Claudia[/name_f], [name_f]Desdemona[/name_f] and [name_f]Mallory[/name_f]. They all have negative meanings. But most people don’t know that. That’s enough for me.
I [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] [name_f]Lolita[/name_f]… [name_u]Forever[/name_u] ruined
If it’s the sound of [name_m]Cohen[/name_m] that appeals to you, how about [name_u]Owen[/name_u] or [name_u]Rowan[/name_u]?
Before I even opened this to look at it, I knew it was going to be about [name_m]Cohen[/name_m]. Gag. It is so played out. Either you care that people are offended, or you don’t. It’s up to you. It has been debated SO MANY TIMES. If you feel guilty about it, that might be a red flag to move on. Probably shouldn’t name your kid something you feel guilty about because it will be with you for the rest of your life.
I dont like [name_u]Owen[/name_u] or [name_u]Rowan[/name_u]. I think [name_m]Cohen[/name_m] will just be a GP name.
I don’t feel guilty for simply liking names. There are a long list of names that I like but wouldn’t use because they would be inappropriate.
Perhaps Cowen or [name_m]Coen[/name_m]? Different spellings, same sound?
See, that’s the part of this debate that gets me. [name_m]Say[/name_m] you used [name_m]Coen[/name_m] or Cowen to sidestep this issue. If you yell out “Cowen” on a playground or in a restaurant, someone who’s inclined to be offended is still probably going to hear [name_m]Cohen[/name_m] and give you a nasty look - because how could you possibly differentiate unless you saw it written down? Is [name_m]Cohen[/name_m] problematic and Cowen not, even though they sound basically the same?
As a child, I doubt it would make much difference. However, it’s possible future employers could be offended when the name pops up on a resume and the spelling would make a difference there.
That’s also what I thought, but I just recently discovered that [name_m]Cohen[/name_m] is supposedly pronounced co-HAYN. Which makes Cowen/Cowan and [name_m]Coen[/name_m] much more plausible for actual use. Also, in response to the original question: [name_f]Lilith[/name_f]! It’s my favorite of the lil- names. But what associations…
I like the name [name_m]Aryan[/name_m], but it’s unusable in [name_u]America[/name_u] and Europe due to the negative Nazism association. It’s too bad, because I really like the sound of the name. (Interestingly enough, the name [name_m]Aryan[/name_m] ranked somewhere around #860 on the official social security top 1000 boy’s names of 2014 list. It kind of makes me wonder if that’s a combination of kids of Iranian American parents, kids of racist parents, and kids of parents who thought, “Eh, screw it. I like that name, so that’s the name he’s getting.”)
While I can’t use the name [name_m]Aryan[/name_m] (not even for a pet or fictional character), I consider it a guilty pleasure. But do I feel actually guilty about liking that name? No I don’t.