Name regret?

Girl Names
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I signed up because I need unbiased opinions! We had our LO in [name_f]May[/name_f]. [name_f]Noella[/name_f] was on our list of names. While I was delivering her it snowed- I was able to watch the snow trickle down during my pushing breaks…which honestly kept me calm! [name_f]My[/name_f] husband called her [name_f]Noella[/name_f] immediately. I was so exhausted from pushing and arguing over names I settled. I announced the name to my family and received hard remarks, that still replay in my mind. His family adores the name. I came home with baby name regret…and I’m still battling the regret. Her nickname is Noey. I have discussed a name change with my husband- he isn’t a fan. He actually thinks I’ll grow to love it and regret changing it in the future.

I would keep her name but as a middle and change her first name to [name_f]Lana[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f].

Or shorten her first name to [name_f]Nella[/name_f] or [name_f]Ella[/name_f]…or change the a to an e… [name_f]Noelle[/name_f].

This may sound entirely crazy. I really thought it was postpartum making me feel uneasy. Has anyone else had this happen?

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I think [name_f]Noella[/name_f] is beautiful and personally prefer it to [name_f]Lana[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] but this is your baby and if you don’t like her name it’s worth discussing changing it. You could always just call her [name_f]Ella[/name_f] or [name_f]Nella[/name_f] as a nickname though. They would both be very natural nicknames for [name_f]Noella[/name_f]. :blush:

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I like [name_f]Noella[/name_f]. I think its cool with the story you told about the snow too! Its really pretty!! Whats her middle name?

Maybe you can save [name_f]Lana[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] for her future sister?

Its up to you and your husband. But [name_f]Noella[/name_f] can have a lot of pretty nicknames too like [name_f]Ella[/name_f] or [name_f]Noelle[/name_f]. Maybe a new nickname would inspire you to like it more?

Its a very personal decision. If you want to change it you certainly can but im just saying I really like [name_f]Noella[/name_f]! I like [name_f]Lana[/name_f] and [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] too but [name_f]Noella[/name_f] has a lot of charm as you usually hear [name_f]Noelle[/name_f]. I really love the “a” ending!

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I think that if you’re questioning it now, you’ll probably have that niggling away at you for possibly forever.
I’d change it if you can’t stop feeling unsure/unsettled about it and that niggle won’t budge. I’m personally not a fan of [name_f]Noella[/name_f] and prefer [name_f]Ella[/name_f] or [name_f]Noelle[/name_f] but do what you feel in your heart is right and not because other family members don’t like it.

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I would stick with [name_f]Noella[/name_f]! I’m sure she will grow into the name, and if not you can call her [name_f]Ella[/name_f] or [name_f]Nella[/name_f] as a nn!

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I absolutely love noella and I second your change to [name_f]Noelle[/name_f]. I think both names are so pretty. [name_m]How[/name_m] do you feel about just [name_f]Ella[/name_f] ? As a NN?

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Noella is so pretty. You could call her [name_u]Noa[/name_u] for short if that helps. [name_u]Noa[/name_u] sounds so sweet and offbeat on a girl.

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Noella is so beautiful, I do personally prefer [name_u]Noel[/name_u]/Noelle but I think it’s very very similar. And as mentioned above, I think it is a bit nicer than [name_f]Lana[/name_f] and [name_f]Lydia[/name_f].

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I like [name_f]Noella[/name_f] and I love the story. [name_f]Do[/name_f] you like [name_f]Noelle[/name_f]? It sounds like a good compromise

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No, its not crazy. Sorry to hear that you’re feeling that way.
I’ve been dealing with similar name regret issues from day 1. When we announced the name to our family we received some harsh remarks which have stayed with me. I thought my doubts would subside over time but three months later, I still continually question our name decision. Its tough.

I do think [name_f]Noella[/name_f] is a beautiful name. And the story behind the name is lovely.
Both [name_f]Nella[/name_f] and [name_f]Ella[/name_f] are great nickname options. I also love Nola which would work as a nickname too. You have some nice options. I hope your name regret subsides or you figure out a name/nickname that feels right.

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I don’t think it’s crazy at all! I think if you don’t love it yet it’s unlikely you will. Naming a child is such a hard thing and I can relate to the post-labour exhaustion - I probably would’ve given in to anything then as well (thankfully I loved my partner’s top choice!).

I think shortening [name_f]Noella[/name_f] or moving it to the middle spot is a great idea if you can convince your husband. I personally think [name_f]Nella[/name_f] or even just [name_f]Nell[/name_f] are both gorgeous, as is [name_f]Ella[/name_f]. I can’t say I love [name_f]Lana[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] but I do think [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Noella[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Noelle[/name_f] would be nice.

One thing I will say is that I think Noey is an absolutely gorgeous nickname and it makes me think of [name_u]Noa[/name_u], a name I love. I wonder if your partner (or you) would like that? It’s similar to [name_f]Noella[/name_f] and allows you to keep Noey as a nickname…

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Noella is beautiful, and she will be respected! If you do want to change it, wait until she’s older so she can give you feedback, because she might like her name.

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Welcome Melly07.

It must be really difficult to regret a name, and my heart goes out to you.

In my opinion, [name_f]Noella[/name_f] is a beautiful name. It feels kind of magical when paired with her birth story! If I saw [name_f]Noella[/name_f], [name_f]Lydia[/name_f], [name_f]Nella[/name_f], [name_f]Ella[/name_f] and [name_f]Lana[/name_f] on a list in here, my vote would go to your little one’s current name without hesitation.

I wonder if some of your difficulty with it is that people you love reacted strongly against it? I know comments from parents, grandparents and siblings are difficult to block out :frowning_face:.

The challenge I see here is that her dad does love the name and isn’t too open to changing it. So in a sense, one of you would have to “lose” in this matter. If her name stays as is, you will “lose” the chance to love the name of your little girl. If the name is changed, he will “lose” the name he and his family have embraced.

I don’t think anyone can tell you what to do in this respect. However, if I could suggest one thing it would be that you can affirm in a gentle way that you do not think you’ll grow to love the name and you doubt you’ll regret changing it (if that’s what you believe). It’s fine for him to stand by [name_f]Noella[/name_f]’s name, but no one can really tell us what to feel or how we’ll feel in the future about something that is currently bothering us.

With that clarification, perhaps you could take it from there. Maybe if he sees that you are firm on the matter, he will give in an inch and a new discussion can take place. If he hears your position as is, and he still doesn’t want to change her name, introduce the idea of the future. Maybe you can pick a name that is fully on your camp for another child in the future, or you can determine a nickname for her that is to your liking (such as [name_f]Nella[/name_f] or [name_f]Ella[/name_f]).

If I may, I will share with you my experience with my son’s [name_m]Felix[/name_m] name. We became [name_m]Felix[/name_m]’s foster family only a few days after his birth. I did not love his name. It reminded me too much of [name_m]Felix[/name_m] the cat. Obviously, as foster parents we had no authority to change the name, and the thought did not cross our minds because that’s not what foster parenting is about. Then we were considered as first candidates for an adoption and we couldn’t say yes to it fast enough. Technically, we could have changed his name, he was still a small toddler, but it didn’t feel like a fair or loving welcoming into the family so we kept it. A couple of years have passed, and I am happy to report that while I don’t think I would have gone with [name_m]Felix[/name_m] on my own, now I adore the name, because it’s my son’s name. I cannot even say that he has my “least” favorite name or the name that gives me pause, I truly love it. It’s 100% him and his biological mom named him well. I even get him [name_m]Felix[/name_m] the cat merchandise.

You don’t need to make peace or settle for [name_f]Noella[/name_f], I just wanted to share to let you know that names do work their way into our hearts.

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You’re not crazy; name regret is common. I would go with [name_f]Ella[/name_f] or [name_f]Isabel[/name_f] “[name_f]Bella[/name_f].”

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[name_f]Noella[/name_f] is not particularly a name I would have chosen, but it grew on me the more I read your story. It’s different and very feminine. You can always call her “[name_f]Ella[/name_f]” as a nickname, without legally changing it. It’s very much a personal decision, but if you can’t stop thinking about it and it bugs you, I’m sure you guys can come to some agreement. [name_f]Lana[/name_f] and [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] are both beautiful, but are not as one-of-a-kind as [name_f]Noella[/name_f].

I’m sorry that your family was so negative towards it, but at the end of the day, she’s your baby and her name should make you smile, not anyone else! :blush:

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There are so many nicknames possible with [name_f]Noella[/name_f], and many are very cute.
[name_u]Noa[/name_u]
[name_f]Noelle[/name_f]
[name_f]Ella[/name_f]
[name_f]Elle[/name_f]
Noelie

Maybe you can find one that helps you with your comfort level.

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I have to agree with @VioletMoon… [name_f]Noella[/name_f] wasn’t a name that had crossed my radar before, but the more I listened to your story, the more I loved it. Using a shorter version of the name, such as [name_f]Ella[/name_f] or [name_f]Elle[/name_f] would be a great way to give her a different name without having to legally change it.

Good luck in deciding, and may whatever you decide make you smile when you hear her name.

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Maybe this is an unpopular opinion but I don’t think it’s fair that your husband started calling her [name_f]Noella[/name_f] right after you gave birth and that just became her name. It doesn’t sound like you were in a state to really consent to what name she was given. It’s not fair that he says you’ll just ‘grow to love it’…

You are absolutely not crazy and can change her name. I think go back to the drawing board with your list of names to see what feels right. Your husband should respect that - he chose a name without you, and now you should agree on one together.

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Honestly naming is soooooo hard I completely understand why you’ve struggled naming your daughter and I think name regret is common.

I think [name_f]Noella[/name_f] is a pretty name it feels unique but familiar and has a crisp image attached. I think of snow and frost on the ground essentially crisp wintry days which is apt for when she was born. I think [name_f]Nella[/name_f] & [name_f]Ella[/name_f] definitely work as a nickname for [name_f]Noella[/name_f]. From your list my favourite is [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] I just think [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] is vintage, romantic and upbeat which is my style but [name_f]Noella[/name_f] from the names mentioned is a close second.

I agree with others I think it’s unfair that your husband pushed [name_f]Noella[/name_f] onto you when you had just gone through a major experience ~ giving birth is not easy ~ therefore most likely unable to actual add valid input into what you want to name your child. I think if you want to change her name DEFINITELY speak to your husband and say to him look [name_f]Noella[/name_f] was sort of pushed onto me and I’m not happy with the name. Ultimately I think the major issue and the reason why your feeling like this is because the decision was inadvertently taken away from you.

Good luck

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I’m going to give the perspective of a child whose father choose their name while mom was out of it from giving birth. [name_f]My[/name_f] name is not common, so I won’t post it, but it is what it is. [name_f]My[/name_f] parents had agreed on a name all along for a little boy, only to find out the week before that I may not be the little boy they were expecting.

They quickly had to regroup and come up with a new name for the girl they never planned on. [name_f]My[/name_f] mom chose [name_u]Lee[/name_u] for the middle name and they agreed on changing the first name to a similar (feminine) variation of the first name they had fallen for. They just couldn’t decide on a spelling (first or middle). [name_f]My[/name_f] father “solved” all of that by announcing the name and spelling to all the family while my mom was asleep after giving birth. Needless to say, she wasn’t happy.

It eventually grew on her, so much so that when I wanted to change it, she made me a deal to wait and see if I still wanted to at 21. If I did, she would let me go ahead with my name change. I never ended up going through with it.

Yes, my mom eventually was fine with name, but I never found out how long it took for that to happen. I do know she had more trouble with the fact that her husband went behind her back to get the spelling he wanted. Unfortunately he is not the type of person that is willing to listen or talk things out. Nor was he one to take credit for his choice, blaming her for it for over 30 years — oddly enough, he also can’t spell the name correctly 90% of the time. :thinking: :woman_facepalming:

Though I posted earlier offering a perspective of how to keep the name you have given your daughter and giving her a name you love at the same time, I won’t say one way or the other which direction is the better option.

Whatever you do, I would start by sitting down and talking over your feelings and your perspective with your husband. Then find a solution that works for both of you. Whatever you two decide, make sure you’re both happy with the decision and the name makes both of you smile. :grinning:

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