Namer's Remorse

General Name Discussion
41

[name]Sailor[/name] seems like a great name to me, until she’s about 10 then I think maybe not so great. It looks lovely written down but I just can’t see it working for a 30-year-old applying for a position as a top lawyer along with people called [name]Grace[/name] and [name]Veronica[/name]. I also find it difficult to imagine an old woman tending to her garden when her neighbour walks past and greets her ‘hello [name]Sailor[/name]!’.

As to the name changing, I can’t see it being too difficult. My cousin changed her name a few years ago and I don’t think she had any trouble. If you like [name]Sailor[/name] maybe just move that to the middle name position and have [name]Chloe[/name] or [name]Ava[/name] (I see these are the ones you like) for a first name to use on formal occasions. That way you can still call her [name]Sailor[/name] but if she’s not so keen when she’s older or it doesn’t seem to fit well then, she can use her first name.

That’s just my advice though and I see lots of people have posted other helpful suggestions too. [name]Hope[/name] everything goes well for you and your daughter:) Good [name]Luck[/name]!

42

I do like my daughters name. However, I love my daughter and I want to protect her and do whats best for her. With that being said I’m worried that her name will not age well, she may get made fun of, because after all it is a bold name, and I worry someday if she does become a doctor or a lawyer perhaps, will her name sound professional enough? Dr. [name]Sailor[/name] [name]Smith[/name] does that sound professional or am I just putting to much into her name?

43

Wow, a lot of advice and a lot of conflicting thoughts here! Thanks for weighing in, [name]Jillian[/name]'s mom – I remember when you went through your own namer’s remorse. I think this problem can be particularly intense when you and your husband have had difficulty on finding a name you both love so end up with a compromise.

I think the name [name]Sailor[/name] is very distinctive and attractive, and I actually prefer it to either [name]Ava[/name] or [name]Chloe[/name]. [name]Ava[/name] is SO popular that I really think it and its variations are going to be the [name]Jennifer[/name] of the next decade – you may go through all this upheaval to change the name to that and end up having a whole different kind of remorse.

On [name]Chloe[/name], [name]Linda[/name] may disagree with me, since it’s her own daughter’s name, and it is absolutely gorgeous, BUT also shooting up in popularity AND frequently misspelled and misunderstood, so people will rhyme it with flow and and call her cole or even chole (to rhyme with bowl). Again, a name ripe for namer’s remorse!

Here’s what I think: If you and your husband can agree full-heartedly on a new name for your daughter, then make the switch and don’t look back.

If you CAN’T find another name you really truly unconflictedly love more, stick with what you have rather than making the switch and finding yourself STILL conflicted.

44

I second [name]Pam[/name]”s advice ” exceptionally well written.

I also love the name [name]Sailor[/name]. However, we”ve all had those names we love but wouldn”t use in the end because we feel it”s ”too out there.” [name]Sailor[/name] seems to me to be on the borderline - I honestly feel it is a real name that is feminine, strong, and pretty and I actually don’t make any sailing connections in my mind. But it’s easy for us to say we love it, not all of us may have the courage to use it. I have always felt that when I have children I want to pick both first names and a middle name that I would be happy with them using as a first name. That way I would get two names for the price of one. If they weren”t happy with their first name they could go by their middle name and it wouldn”t upset me because I would have put equal thought into their middle name. Perhaps, if you find a name you like but are reluctant to completely change her name ” give her a new middle name that you would be happy with her going by if say, when she enters high school she wants something different.

Let me digress with a little true story:
My partner was named [name]Ryan[/name]. His parents had another name picked out, but after using an unusual name for their first child and getting grief from relatives, they decided to use a more common place name. At 15 my husband found out what his name was supposed to be and loved it, so they legally changed his name to [name]Ryder[/name] ” what it was supposed to be in the first place. This was 10 years ago and now his name”s popularity is increasing. He”s much happier as [name]Ryder[/name] and honestly it suits him better, but 25 years ago it was fairly uncommon. We never know which names will suddenly become popular. [name]Sailor[/name] could be all the rage in 20 years.

So in conclusion, I would definitely keep [name]Sailor[/name] in one form or another because it was the name you first gave her, and in one way or another you and your husband identify her by it. I agree with [name]Pam[/name] that if you find a name you both love equally or more then use it as a first name and keep [name]Sailor[/name] as a middle name. Or you can keep [name]Sailor[/name] as a first and add a new middle that you would be comfortable with her going by if she chooses to when she”s older. (I have to say, like others, it is growing on me)!

I wish you the best of luck.

Ps. Sorry for the long post.

45

I like [name]Sailor[/name], I really like the way it sounds. And it’s lovely that it has a special meaning for you as well!

Maybe give yourself another month to see if you fall in love with it again and your fears subside a bit? [name]Every[/name] parent worries that their child will be picked on, I think we all understand your fears - if only we could ensure it would never happen. But I think many more kids will love your daughter’s name than will think it’s ‘weird.’ I bet plenty of little girls would be jealous that they don’t have a name like [name]Sailor[/name] - it’s cool.

If you still feel nervous after a month, it will be just as easy to change as it is now. I hope things get better for you!

46

First of all, I’d just like to say that I can’t even begin to imagine the frustration and pain you must be going through over this situation, and my heart goes out to you, your husband, and little Miss [name]Sailor[/name] [name]May[/name]. [name]May[/name] you all find some relaxation amidst this turmoil and confusion.

I do like the name [name]Sailor[/name], even as a person who generally favors classic names for the most part. That being said, I totally understand your fears about the potential lack of professionalism expressed by the name [name]Sailor[/name], something that could hinder your daughter in her future endeavors. You know what? I think that is ridiculous. When I really think about it, I have a hard time picturing [name]Aiden[/name] on a grown man, too, but that didn’t stop thousands of parents from using the name. In a decade, names like [name]Aiden[/name] and [name]Avery[/name], [name]Skylar[/name] and [name]Sailor[/name] will be the names of the adult generation, so that is not of concern. In the future, if [name]Sailor[/name] becomes a doctor or lawyer or actress or whatever, she can go by her full name (first and middle) as a means of establishing some authority and presence.

[name]Sailor[/name] is cute, spunky, but more importantly, of significance to you and your husband, which I love. If you want a name with more substance, perhaps change the middle name. Something like [name]Sailor[/name] [name]Jane[/name] or [name]Sailor[/name] [name]Margaret[/name] would anchor the unique name with a classic favorite, giving it stability, staying power, and an added degree of professionalism for the future. Or, if you and your husband both find a name you really love and agree on, change it, and keep [name]Sailor[/name] as the middle name. I’d really follow [name]Pam[/name]'s advice here, because she is the expert and her advice is excellent. As for [name]Chloe[/name] and [name]Ava[/name], I agree with her, but I do think [name]Olivia[/name] [name]Sailor[/name] is darling. I know [name]Olivia[/name] is getting popular, but it still has that elegance and classicism that sets it apart from the [name]Ava[/name]'s and [name]Bailey[/name]'s of today’s preschools.

Again, I wish you the best of luck in your decision. You never know, [name]Sailor[/name] could fit your little princess like a charm! Take a couple weeks to get to know your daughter as a little girl, embracing and understanding her personality, and see if this fits in with your vision of [name]Sailor[/name]. If it does, then there is no reason to change it, as some people will object to any name you choose. If you show [name]Sailor[/name] that you love her name and her, then she has no reason to feel self-conscious about it. Empower your daughter and embrace her name, whatever that may be…

47

I love this advice!

48

I can imagne how you must be feeling! But I don’t think it is wrong to ask your husband this. She will be your child forever and you’ll might keep this bad feeling. So I think you should either change her name or maybe use [name]Sailor[/name] together with her middle name?

49

I just wanted to fill those in, whom were so helpful. My husband and I did decide to change our daughters name. We decided to change her name to [name]Audrey[/name]. For me [name]Audrey[/name] executes everything that I was looking for in a name, traditional, timeless, and feminine. But most of all my hushand and I both love the name [name]Audrey[/name]. Thank you again and God Bless.

50

Thank you SO much for letting us know what you decided upon.

I am very happy that both you and your husband have found THE name for your baby girl. [name]Audrey[/name] is a lovely name but I am dying to know if you kept [name]Sailor[/name] in the mn spot.

51

To echo [name]Rollo[/name], thanks for the update! I think that [name]Audrey[/name] is such a beautiful name, and I hope that you and your baby girl are doing well! :slight_smile:

Best wishes to you! :slight_smile: